Britney’s Asstacular New Look
You know, it would just be easiest to label this photo “Celebrity Mommy Fashion Don’ts” and be done with it, but truthfully? The thing that most strikes me about this photograph of the ever-inspiring Britney Spears is not that it is very possibly the most egregious violation of sartorial aesthetics in the history of the world (yes, including loin-cloths made from the hide of the Sabre-Tooth Tiger - which, you know, were pretty cool before prehistoric PETA started hurling Woolly Mammoth blood at anybody who wore them - and also including that creepy swan dress that Bjork wore to the Oscars that one time). Nor is it the fact that Ms. Spears is so determined to show her nether regions that she now goes around without panties or pants, which causes one to shudder at the prospect of how she’s going to pare down her skin coverage next. No, the thing that most strikes me about this photograph is that it demonstrates, incontrovertibly, that Britney Spears’ post-partum ass is really no better than my own. Youth, a gazillion dollars, and a team of personal trainers has not given this girl a superior ass, and that, my friends, has really made my day.
o.k- I gotta say it, we could call this photo “bad-ass mother”. roll drums… any laughs? Perhaps some groans?