Show Me the Mommies!
Seventeen weeks to go. Seventeen effing weeks. That’s like, a thousand weeks in pregnancy weeks by the way. (Pregnancy weeks are like regular weeks except every day that passes seems like ten because they’re so damn LOOOONG. Seriously. Is it still Wednesday? It feels like last Wednesday. Or would it feel like next Wednesday? I don’t even know anymore.)
…Twenty-three weeks pregnant? Sha! More like twenty-three YEARS…
I recently wrote about my new obsession with HGTV but that’s like, soooo last week. This week I’m all about Discovery Health. The other night, while flipping channels, AKA, my new favorite SEVENTEEN-WEEKS-LEFT hobby, I came across this show, which shockingly was EXACTLY what I was looking for. Screw nesting. I want BIRTH STORIES! Show me the MOMMIES! Preferably in labor!
“Oh my God, Hal! You should get a job on THIS show! It’s about women giving BIRTH!”
“Uh… Yeah, Bec. Sounds fun!”
And then, about five seconds later:
“Gee… Everyone in this show is so familiar for some reason…Weird”
And then I realized that duh! Of COURSE everyone in the show is familiar. The show takes place in my doctor’s office. At my new-improved (sorry, Cedars) hospital.
“Look Hal! There’s our receptionist! And my favorite nurse! Whoa! And there’s that one chick that couldn’t figure out my insurance card!”
Los Angeles is funny like that. You turn on the television and look, there’s my house in the background of that commercial! or Hey! I met that guy on Nerve personals, back in 2001 and now he’s on THAT show?
I should have known it was only time before my doctor’s office got its own TV show.
Holy shitbitch! There’s the ultrasound machine I saw my baby on for the first time. And the scale they weigh my pregnant ass on every month!
Needless to say, I’ve been TIVOing the show like a motha. I mean, I have seventeen-years until I birth this babe, I might as well get acquainted with the birthing rooms I’ll soon be laboring in and the dude who will most likely be administering my epidural. Being that it’s on TV and all.
Thank you Discovery Health Channel and Viva Los Angeles!
***
Love, love, love that dress!
And I’m digging the comforter too . . . I think I want to be your shopping buddy
So are you going to be on this reality show???
Oh God no. That would be a little much for me. I didn’t even want my mother in the delivery room with me. I think it’s a very private, personal affair, something for both parents to bond over. I can’t imagine having cameras in the room. Oy vey.
Not to mention the small fact that my doctor isn’t even on the show. Just his office and his staff which is inexplicable, really. I know he shares his office but I’m pretty sure it’s with one other doctor, not with three. TVLand, you confuse…
And re: the dress, I wish I could send you a link. I got it on sale at a boutique in San Diego last Christmas. It’s not even maternity but it’s been a great bump dress fo sho. Comforter and bedding all from this set at Anthropologie:
http://www.anthropologie.com/anthro/catalog/productdetail.jsp?_dyncharset=ISO-8859-1&_dynSessConf=3658635019893105081&id=79502&parentid=SLEEP_BEDDING_DUVETS&pushId=SLEEP_BEDDING_DUVETS&popId=SLEEP_BEDDING&sortProperties=&navCount=7&navAction=poppushpush&fromCategoryPage=true&selectedProductSize=&selectedProductSize1=&color=whe
Ha!! I love that about Los Angeles. My perinatologist has been on Oprah a bunch of times. I never watched Oprah until I was on bed rest desperate for entertainment, and when I saw him I thought, well, if he’s good enough for Oprah, he must be good enough for me.
I watched Discovery Healths birthing programs like a freak when I was pregnant. Its so addicting. Everyone told me not to though, that it would freak me out for the birth. But it did just the opposite.
And THANK GOD I did watch them. I didn’t take any birthing classes. I read (read: flipped through) one birthing book. So when I was in the hospital and they told me my stats and what was up, I actually understood things. Thank you Discovery Health!
Also check out ‘Clean House’& ‘The Baby Diaries’ while you’re nesting. It was like porn for me.
“I didn’t even want my mother in the delivery room with me” – I can’t think of anything worse than my mother in the delivery room with me
Funny story though. LA is nuts.
Awww, I’m not far behind you! I’m 13 weeks with a Bean right now (my first!), and I’m obsessively recording Deliver Me and Bringing Home Baby and A Baby Story on my DVR already. I’m definitely not going to see my doctor’s office on TV, but I live in Colorado, not sunny LA.
Oh, I was addicted to TLC’s baby story. I watched it and cried and envied… I always want to know what’s coming. You know? I’m not always the most physically prepared – but dammit, mentally prepared I am.
Did you guys know it’s BABY WEEK on Discover Health? It’s like Shark Week but WAAAAAAAAY better OMIGAWD. I’m TIVOing every single show like a mad woman.
Also, Discovery Health should hire me as its publicist.
I think we share the same brain! I am a couple weeks ahead of you and totally over being pregnant. I want results- in my arms- stat!!
I know what show you are talking about, and I saw my doctor on it- she is an patient and OB herself! Totally crazy! Only in LA!!!
i am a few weeks ahead of your in operation birthing a girl (7 weeks) and you are so right, each week is like 4 million times too long. all i can do now is dream about margaritas.
i live in santa monica and i swear everytime i turn on the tv i see this town, its nuts, esp how friggin skinny everyone is (esp when you are so pregnant).
Not pregnant, but I still love those shows.
And watching them prepared me for the c-pap with Quinn. Didn’t do much to prepare me for the vent, but I did learn a lot.
You look great. Is she doing flips yet???
Heh. I’m 14 weeks and want my results NOW NOW NOW. Whoever invented that 40-week thang, get with the program; in the age of instant messaging and the tummy tuck, we need to re-engineer that process down to 20 weeks. Or 10. Without the morning sickness.
Thank you.
And yeah, I want that dress, too!
Since we moved from LA, watching TV, movies, commercials, etc is like looking at a scrapbook. It’s SO WIERD! It doesn’t make me miss it, though, and I’m happy to be away from that awful air quality. I just really miss the mexican food.
You know you’re in LA when you’re dodging Jay Leno (jaywalking) in your grocery store parking lot- all I wanted was milk!!!
Totally not prego, nor have any desire to be in the near future, but was quite obsessed with any tlc “a baby story” in college. We would always mute the “baby flying out of the va-jay-jay parts”. It was too much to fathom for a few college girls…and we wondered what our dorm-mates were thinking. Now, I won’t watch it, for fear just watching it will make me with child.
You think LA is bad. It’s a joy to see how Vegas is depicted. Who knew the drive from Hoover Dam to the strip is only three minutes? The last time I drove it, it was nearly thirty!
You may think you’re huge, but you look skinner than me — and I had my last one 15 months ago!
Wow, where has the time gone? (23 weeks for the non-pregnant feels more like 23 days, I think.) And yes, that dress is AWESOME! You look gorgeous.
Man, when I was on bed rest I watched TLC constantly – “A Baby Story” and “Bringing Home Baby” and feeling all superior, because I was going to have no drugs and breastfeed for a million years unlike those suckers. Then my birthing class teacher was like, “Who watches those crazy unrealistic shows?” all disapproving-like. No one else raised their hands, so I was embarrassed to. And I know they are crap – but they are also crack.
I love “How Clean is Your House” on BBC America. It’s 80 million times better than it’s American counterpart, and it makes me wish I had time to clean my floors.
You’re one of those beautiful pregnant chics that the rest of us despise! Ok- not only does every day seem like a year when pregnant, but at least you have something to show for it at this point (cute belly). Raise your hand if you love the first 3 months where you’re not really yourself, but you’re not really showing yet either, so instead of ‘glowing’ and pregnant, everyone just assumes you wolfed down one too many big macs. precious.
I wish they would film TV shows in my doctor’s office – I would love to be able to watch a place I actually go to on TV. It’s so… meta. Ha! I love saying that. Seriously, though, I think all that Disovery stuff was created just for the pregnant. I don’t watch TV, but when I was pg, I saw SO many episodes of A Birth Story and cried every time. Porny preggo goodness.
LOVE, LOVE, LOVE that show! I also obsessively watch “A Baby Story” when I was pg with my now 2 year old.
Before I gave birth, I refused to watch the birthing shows. I didn’t want any preconceptions. But AFTER I gave birth, I was addicted to “House of Babies,” “Runway Moms,” and “Babies: Special Delivery.” It was like some kind of weird post-mortem because I’d had a c-section.
Okay, I was obsessed with birthing shows when I was pregnant! Both times. What is it about them?
The funny thing is that all the women on that show, grunt quietly when they’re having a contraction, which I find hysterical because I was like this screaming lunatic when it was me.
These chicks are quiet about their pain, man. They don’t want to get me on this show…
Kim
PS Just got your book. Looking forward to the read…
You’re so right! I think that’s what happens when you stick a camera in the face of a birthing mother. Ayayayay. And “House of Babies” was in my lineup from TIVO last night. I think that’s my favorite baby show so far … Soooo GOOD.
So you picked Good Sam? That’s where we had Ronan and girl – that place is FABULOUS! They treated us really well and I felt very safe knowing that they are in the top ten and had a NICU unit on site, so no separating me from baby! Thankfully we didn’t have to use that facility. I was very happy with our choice and the staff was wonderful.
Good luck and continue to have a great pregnancy. You are looking great gal!
I think you have to be the most-cutest pregnant mom I have ever seen!
Thank you! And yes, Good Sam and we LOVE it. LOVE LOVE LOVE my OBGYN (anyone need a GREAT OB in LA, talk to me.) I love the nurses in his office and everyone I’ve met on site has been great. I also love that my OB’s office is AT the hospital. In the past I had to shlep back and forth from Century City to Cedars in Bev Hills so this is really awesome. I really wanted to stay at Cedars because I had a great experience there (minus my old OB being horrific) but I changed to good Sam because that was where the amazing OB was and so far I’m loving it! Glad to hear you had a great experience there, Melanie!
I don’t do the birthing shows, but I love “Bringing Home Baby.” Suckers. Actually now that I’ve had one I like the birthing shows better ’cause they’re all, “I’m going to have a peaceful water birth and let him breastfeed until he can say, ‘Mother, I’m going to kindergarten next week and I think I’d like to wean.’” I just like saying “Suckers!” when they’re all, “AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH” and “Breastfeeding is hard.”
You’re an adorable pregnant lady! How’s Archer with it all?
Archer’s great so far! He seems to understand what’s going on but changes have been pretty minor thus far. No baby gear in the house yet, but he did take one look at the infant carseat over the weekend and say “For baby?” which was pretty cute.
Last year during my 2nd pregnancy I got to see the Nat’l Geographic’s inside the womb story. WOW! They should bring that back.
Those shows are so addicting. Once I delivered I stopped watching. Who needs to see “Bringing Home Baby” when I was living it? lol