Grey’s Anatomy Tackles Mother Vs. Baby Issue
You might have been tuning in to the final airing of the Grey’s Anatomy/Private Practice special for an update on Little Grey and McSteamy, but I had to know what happened to the pregnant chick – would they lose her, or the baby?
In case you’re not a fan (or just haven’t settled in with your Tivo to play catch up), neurosurgeon Dr. Derek Shepherd has spent three episodes operating over and over on a pregnant woman’s brain while his ex-wife has stood by to keep tabs on her child in utero.
Last night, it all came to a boiling point (as did other issues on the show – but I’ll leave those revelations to your Tivo), and patient Jen’s husband is clear – if it comes down to my baby or my wife, pick my wife. Bring back my wife.
It reminded me of my husband – who made it clear during my pregnancy that if anything were to go wrong during delivery (not that there was any risk of that), he said he didn’t care what happened. As long as I walked out of there with him. Fortunately, it never came to that. Our daughter, the light of his life, was delivered after an average thirteen hours of labor and natural childbirth with no complications. She was perfect. I was serviceably healthy (really, does any woman look perfect after childbirth? Wan, yes, perfect. . . I think not).
Pregnancy isn’t nearly as risky as it was back in ye olden days, but there are always risks – especially when you throw in a C-section, which is, after all, major surgery. Did you and your partner ever have this discussion during pregnancy? Dads, did you worry about her safety going into the delivery room?
Image: ABC
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I would definatly want my baby to live. I know it may seem selfish, because I already have one child and should be around to take care of him, but he has a father to do that too, and a single/remarried father is perfectly capable of taking care of a child. When I was pregnant I made it perfectly clear to my partner that I would not be able to live with either him or myself if he sacrificed my babies life for my own.
I’d have to go with saving my life as a priority – I have two wonderful daughters who need their mother and my husband agrees 100%.
Yep – not a word. For the reasons another_ mom already said.
Anywho – I’d pick the child over me anyday – my husband knows that and I hope he’d respect it.
As an editor, I just can’t stop myself from weighing in about “irregardless.” It might help if you think of it as a double negative. Because of the definition of “regardless,” there is no use for “irregardless.” You can’t use “irregardless” to mean “regardless,” — they’re not interchangeable. As an editor, we don’t allow it to be used, ever. That said, I’m also a believer in the theory that, “the language is what the people use,” but my love of our language is tarnished when I hear words like, “irregardless” or “ain’t” or the like.
However, Sarah, I would never hold it against you to use whatever words you want. This is a comments section of a blog, not a term paper; we all make mistakes in day-to-day word use!
Also worth noting: anyone who lives in the Raleigh, NC-area should check out the restaurant Irregardless Cafe, off Hillsborough Street. It’s delicious!
Hey Sarah- If you’re going to use the common dialect argument (as in Miriam Webster’s def. of irregardless)then I hope you defend words such as “ain’t” and “ho” for their statures as a word as well. The definition you cite states that it is used in speech and some prose, but didn’t come into formation until the 20th century. That pretty much means that the frequency of people using the incorrect word forces the dictionary companies to reevaluate it. It still doesn’t mean it’s the best choice.
Actually, my sweet L, irregardless is a word.
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/irregardless
Always verify before you decide to goose-step all over another person’s word usage.
My husband’s reasoning was that I can always have another baby but there wouldn’t be another me. Luckily we didn’t have to face that but he made it absolutely clear who he would have chosen.
Your doctor will not and cannot sacrifice you, the mother, to save an unborn child. It is against their ethics. They always choose the living, breathing patient over one wiht the potential to be living and breathing. Your partner does not have the authority to sentence you to death and you cant ask the doctor to let you die.
I agree 100% with anonyme. I wasn’t ready to die for someone I didn’t know. Now I totally would die for my daughter, but not then. My husband was actually quite worried I would die and told me many times if it came down to me or her he would pick me, which was reassuring.
Sarah, the word you should have used is ‘regardless’, not ‘irregardless’ (there’s no such word!). Sorry to be the grammar police, but that is one that especially drives me crazy.
My partner didn’t have to think twice. He said he would pick the baby over me, because I’ve lived my life. I still don’t know how to feel about that one…
We never discussed it with our first, as far as I remember. However, we now have two kids. If in the future it comes down to me or the unborn baby, we would both have to choose me out of obligation to our other children. I think that it is incredibly noble for a woman to sacrifice her own life for her child, but I do think that the picture changes some when there are other children involved.
I feel like you’re not supposed to say this, and so I’m not giving any of my usual internet comment handles – but I have voiced the opposite decision. I want my husband to want to save me first – as the guy on Grey’s last night said, there are many ways to be a parent, and I am not ready to die for someone I have never met, at least not in this hypothesis.
We discussed it, because who doesn’t like discussing unlikely hypotheticals?
I made it clear that, as the adult, I am capable of making a choice. The baby is not. Therefore, I can choose to give my life for my baby, if it comes to that.
I told my husband that that was my decision, should he be called upon to voice it for me. That way, I have freely made a decision about my own body that can be carried out even if I am not able to express it.
My husband almost had to make that decision after a horrible case of preeclampsia, preterm labor and hemorrhaging.
I however, told him to save our daughter, I’m still not sure if he would have made that choice in the final minutes.
Luckly though we both came out of it healthy, it took a few months but it’s all better now.
Irregardless of your opinion on this matter, states like ND are working steadily to make sure that women 2nd class status in this country.
In a few years, not saving the baby will be considered homicide.
What a wonderful thought.