If you've been hanging out here at the SD for a while then you probably know that my younger son has Down syndrome . His name is Eric and he'll be four next month. Want to play ball with him? It's been quite an amazing journey with him, as

I do judge Arthur Miller, in the same way that I judge anybody who chooses to turn their back on their child just because they have Down’s syndrome. I make no apology for my comments, in the same way that thousands of people across the globe make no apology for their bigoted views towards people with Down’s syndrome day in and day out, particularly in the media. I can speak from experience, as I too have a child with Down’s syndrome. I feel that it is disgraceful that society has allowed itself to get to a stage where a whole group of people are discrimintated against in this fashion. If this was an ethnic group we were talking about, there would be outrage, and quite rightly so. Why is it deemed to be acceptable for people with learning difficulties and in particular Down’s syndrome to be seemingly erradicated from life, before it has begun? This to me is evil, and no I am not some sort of pro-life activist. The medical profession are largely prejudiced towards people with Down’s syndrome and in my experience offer you no positvity towards your unborn child. This I feel is unforgivable, as I am certain that they intentionally avoid enlightening you to the joys that your child with Down’s will bring, and instead it seems, are determined to deter you from continuing with your pregnancy. Unlike Karen, I don’t feel ambivalence towards my child, quite the opposite in fact. I love my daughter unconditionally and in doing so, I am glad that she has Down’s syndrome because if she didn’t, she wouldn’t be the individual that she is, and I wouldn’t want to change her for the world. I used to respect Arthur Miller, oh how differently I now feel towards this man who couldn’t love his own son. Shame on you Arthur Miller! To all the people out there who feel he may have been justified in feeling the way he did, ask yourselves this. If you had a child who was born without any disability and they were breezing through life, only to ecounter an accident that left them brain damaged in some way, would you just abandon them?

What a beautiful essay. While I do think there are things that are “right” and “wrong,” I agree that we never know the whole situation until we are there.

I totally know what you mean about “mourning” your expectations. Although I am blessed to have a beautiful and now heart healthy daughter, I too had to mourn my expectations those first few days so I could embrace the gift she is.

Oh, and your son is adorable.

Beautiful, Karen.

wow. thanks for sharing your account.

It’s lovely to see articles with depth and compassion on here. This one stands out. I hope to see more articles like this on this site in the future!

Every time I see pictures of your son I want to smother him with kisses. He is THAT adorable. Thankfully, I have an office that affords me some privacy, otherwise it might look weird — me and the monitor and all.

I was going to cover this on FameCrawler but wasn’t sure what angle to take.

Nicely done.

I’m assuming (haven’t read the article yet) that this was done back when it was considered the “right thing to do” and it was thought that children with downs or other disabilities didn’t have a chance for a “normal life”. I think when speaking about these parents you have to also remember that they were often persuaded to put their children away by medical professionals and relatives who had no concept of the true nature of these disabilities. In essenence: it was a decision made out of ignorance.

My cousin was born in the early 60s and suffered a brain injury rendering him “retarded”. He was put away and later died in his 30s in this institution (and it was a “nice” private one too that cost a ton of money). I can’t imagine what my aunt, uncle and cousins must have gone through (aside from their divorces, drop outs, feelings of inadequacy, etc) and how different their decisions would have been had they had him 10 or 20 years later. It haunts me that a young man, with no other issues than a brain injury, should die so young. I think it’s a reflection more on the care these poor children and adults suffered rather than their specific maladies. I’ve since learned that children with mental retardation, can and do live long lives and can be loving and loved and supported.