What to Expect in the Bedroom When Your Wife Is ExpectingScott Neumyer
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Your wife will still be hot
Before she got pregnant, I had an absolutely beautiful wife with an amazing body. It was as if I had scored a trophy wife, only mine had brains and a fantastic personality and a great sense of humor. After she got pregnant I still had a beautiful wife with an amazing body, brains, a fantastic personality, and a great sense of humor. Only now I had all that, plus my wife was carrying our baby, making her body that much sexier. This shifted my (admittedly voracious) sexual appetite into overdrive.
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You get to try new positions
If your sex life pre-pregnancy has been mostly vanilla, you're probably in for a bit of a surprise during pregnancy. When women get pregnant, they tend to grow in a lot of places that make your normal, everyday sex uncomfortable, annoying, and sometimes painful. Now's your chance to break out the Kama Sutra and try all those positions you've been begging to try for years. Oh, and do your best to impress her. If you show her how good you are in these positions while shes pregnant, there's a good chance shell want to continue to use them (and explore even more options) after pregnancy.
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She might not want it at all and then all of a sudden want it all the time
Pregnancy can cause your lady's hormones to go completely haywire. All of a sudden her moods are changing, her body can'ttolerate foods she previously loved, and she has zero interest in sex (both physically and emotionally). My advice here is to wait it out without pushing the issue. Though some women have no libido in the first trimester, they may feel sexually supercharged in the second trimester. Its a bit of a toss-up, so don't nag. Just wait and watch.
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Use every available chance to have sex
After childbirth, parents have very little time to themselves. (Just a heads up: This usually lasts for, oh, about 18 years, at least.) If you're going to keep your sex life fresh and full of lovin', you're going to want to take advantage of any possible free time to get frisky. In the shower. In the kitchen. In the closet. In the line at the supermarket. Wherever shes willing to get it on. Experiment. Be free, young parents. Those windows of opportunity will be far and few between once baby arrives, so be sure to take full advantage.
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You may have to stop or use a condom, but you're not going to hurt the baby
Yeah, yeah. We've heard it before, guys. You're so big you're worried you're going to hurt the baby. Well, you won't. The baby is protected by the amniotic sac and all that jostling isn't going to hurt it. Promise. One thing to keep in mind, however, is that male semen contains substances called prostaglandins, which can sometimes cause Braxton Hicks contractions (near the end of pregnancy it can even help induce labor). After your lady experiences these for the first time, she may ask you to wear a condom, pull out pre-ejaculation, or stop sex altogether. If she does ask for either of the first two, I suggest you comply immediately otherwise, you're pretty much guaranteed to receive the third suggestion.
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Youll still dig sex after childbirth
If you're still digging sex during pregnancy, chances are good that you're still going to dig it after childbirth. If you're worried that things are different down there, you're an idiot. Get over it, treat your wife like the Queen she is, and give her the attention she deserves.
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Don't worry if you take a few weeks off
Its an exhausting few weeks (at least) post-childbirth, and sex is usually the last thing on your mind when you're tired and haven't showered. Those first few weeks are hard, no question but once you find a rhythm in your daily routine, you'll find it gets easier to make time for intimacy. And trust me, being a team player now will definitely benefit you later.
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Be sensitive to your wife and listen to her
I can'tstress this enough. She may be having postpartum issues. She may be having self esteem issues (if you think you were the only one worried if things are different down there, you're wrong). And she may just be worried about being a new mom. Its normal and it gets better. Be patient-- it'll make your relationship and your sex life better.
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Adding some time constraints can add a little fun to your sex life
Finding time for sex is hard when you have a child (think about it this way: Pretty much any time they're home and awake is now off-limits), but those constraints can also make it adventurous and fun. Sneaking off with my wife during my kids short nap time makes me feel like were high school students sneaking around while our parents are at work.
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Remember that she carried your kid
You have a woman who has now given you the greatest gift you could ever ask for. I mean, it may not be a gift you'll want immediately after the first one, but its an amazing feat. The woman I fell in love with has turned into a stronger, more powerful, can-do-anything-now-that-shes-given-birth woman with a glow about her that never stops shining. It doesn't hurt to remind her of these things.
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Wrap it up
Your kid is here and hes amazing, we know, but if you're not ready to repeat the whole process in nine months, use precaution. I know, I know. You've been waiting for weeks (and maybe even months), but don't let one hasty (read: horny) decision turn into another huge responsibility. Though some say women can'tget pregnant while breastfeeding, if you're not planning on having another child right away, be safe and use some form of birth control. I don't think I need to explain to you how having two toddlers at the same time will affect your sex life, do I? Didn't think so.
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