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Reminiscing: The Comfort that Comes from Experiencing a Family of Three Again

threefamilyBefore the existence of Vivi seemed like a real thing, we functioned as a tightknit family of three. The three of us were together for six years, and over those six years, a dynamic grew between the three of us and we eventually believed it would always just be the three of us.

With Vivi’s birth, we realized the three of us would eventually become the four of us and that just seemed weird. In fact, it still seems weird when I think about it. So many of the little patterns that we follow were formulated around the preferences of the three of us. Plus, all three of us have been around for the entirety of our time together as three.

Adding Vivi to that mix has thrown things off a bit. Although I can’t picture our family without that little girl who loves to run from room to room with her one arm swinging and her belly poking out like she owns the joint, sometimes things feel more comfortable when it is just me, Casey, and Addie. But eventually those moments will fade away into the distance never to be seen again.

Before Vivi was born we used to spend evenings in the winter playing various games. Some of our favorite games were Candy Land, Chutes and Ladders, and Monkey Memory Match. Addie once beat me at Candy Land seven times in a row. I was sure the kid had sold her soul to the Candy Land gods by the time her seventh win rolled around. Casey has dominated at Monkey Memory Match. That lady has the perfect mind for such a game. The only times we’ve ever beaten her consistently is when she was pregnant with Vivi. Chutes and Ladders has taken a back seat to those other games.

It was during those times where our dynamic of three was on full display. Vivi has never participated, but there will come a time when Vivi will join in and we’ll have to figure out how to convert our dynamic to fit a foursome. Although trivial, it will be a bit difficult to decide who gets to roll first or who gets what color of figurine. It is those little moments of watching Addie decide who will go first and who gets what color (and the whys, those are always entertaining) that I will remember well into my 70s.

The other night we gathered to play a game of Candy Land after Vivi went to bed. As we sat on the floor playing our little game like it was just the three of us again, it felt comfortable. And then I realized those moments of it just being the three of us are going to go away in the next year or two never to be seen again, and that makes me a little sad.

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