I’ve been pretty fortunate that I didn’t have to change the first poopy diaper for either Addie or Vivi. Though, I would have rather been the one to change Vivi’s first diaper than have her born meconium stained like she was.
That was the plan: I would be the one to change Vivi’s first diaper since Casey had that responsibility with Addie. The first diaper is usually full of quite a bit of tar-looking stuff and is one of the grosser diapers that has to be changed throughout infanthood. I wasn’t looking forward to that moment.
The nurse told us after we arrived at the hospital that Vivi was meconium stained. I had no idea what that even meant, but apparently it meant that Vivi had her first poop while still inside the womb. It looked like we had an anxious pooper on our hands.
A few hours after delivery, Vivi pooped again and it looked like Casey had given birth to a perfectly healthy baby girl. All that changed a few days after leaving the hospital when we realized Vivi hadn’t pooped in days.
We started anxiously anticipating Vivi’s next poop because that would have to mean she was alright. Day six went by and nothing. Then day seven and eight passed, but still nothing. Nine, ten, eleven and twelve were the same. By day fifteen, we already had Vivi’s intestines x-rayed and had set an appointment with a gastroenterologist.
Our days were filled with worry. It was heart wrenching to look at that little body and wonder what could be wrong and whether whatever was wrong would cause our baby to suffer in the future. We began to pray that Vivi would poop and be alright.
Then our prayers were answered. Vivi pooped. Then she pooped again and again and again. We had never been so happy to see poop. Or change poopy diapers.
It was during that string of successful poops that Addie and I had our worst diaper changing experience. When I change diapers, I do everything I possibly can to keep from touching the poop. I just can’t handle it. That means that Addie is always my assistant when it comes time to changing Vivi’s diaper.
I have Addie hold a plastic bag where I can put the dirty wipes when I am done with them. That way I don’t have a mound of dirty wipes that my hand can accidentally brush up against, and it also keeps the mound of dirty wipes from rolling over onto the diaper changing table, which would then require being scrubbed and scoured before I could use it again.
I took Vivi’s diaper off and got her all clean when Vivi decided she wasn’t done pooping. She pooped again right there on the new diaper before it had even been fastened to her. Okay, I thought. That’s not so bad. This baby needs to poop, it’s a good thing. I cleaned her up again, but before I could put the new diaper under her butt, Vivi decided she still wasn’t done. A two foot stream of poop shot out of that baby and landed all over the changing table. I quickly moved the baby to another spot in the room and covered her butt with another diaper. There I stood for what seemed like an eternity as Vivi pooped again, and again, and again.
Addie has never let Casey or I ever forget about that diaper changing experience. For the next year of Vivi’s life, Addie asked after each poopy diaper change whether Vivi squirted poop again. That poopy changing experience has become the diaper changing experience that all other diaper changing experiences are measured.
Easily the worst diaper changing experience of my life.