Herland
Why are there so few male teachers?
by L. J. Williamson
August 11, 2008
Marsiglio's opinion is that teenage boys should be encouraged to babysit just as teenage girls are. Teenagers, who developmentally at a very egocentric stage, says Marsiglio, need opportunities to develop an appreciation for caring for others. In his work with male youth group volunteers, Marsiglio found that the skills they acquired by working with children — patience, sensitivity, appreciation for the diverse personality types of different kids — would not only help them to become better fathers, but also make them better able to contribute to society as a whole. "Developing those skills is something that transcends the family. It extends to the public domain."
So how does Bowin respond to parents who insist that male employees not change their children's diapers? "I tell them that they need to find another place to put their children," she says. "We believe that all of our teachers are respectful to children, and we do not discriminate on the basis of gender, just as we don't discriminate against someone who black, or someone in a wheelchair."
Yet eliminating gender bias isn't a top priority for everyone. "If I'm accused of being sexist, I don't particularly care, if it means that the odds are higher that my kids are safe," said one blog poster. "I don't care being accused of sexism or paranoia. Better safe than sorry," echoed another. "I will not sacrifice my children on the altar of political correctness," said a third.
But Marsiglio sees the issue as a larger one. For him, having more men taking care of children isn't just about curbing sexism, but about improving the welfare of all children. "When you have gender equity in the larger society, with both men and women invested in children's lives, children will benefit more than they would if only half the population has a strong commitment to them." How will my son ever learn that fathers aren't the only men in the world who are supposed to care about children?Of course, children may have committed fathers at home, but that's not a holistic picture. "It's important for children to see men nurturing children in public settings; those lessons in the context of a public setting can be very powerful," Marsiglio says. Children will grow up more confident and supported, he adds, "if they feel that a wider diversity of people are looking out for their best interests. But if you only have half the population focused on kids, kids have fewer opportunities. If males who want to become involved with children are looked at askance, then males will be less likely to want to spend time with kids, then society overall will suffer from that."
I'm grateful that my children have a caring, committed father in their lives. But he's just one man. Without role models, I wonder, how will my son ever learn that fathers aren't the only men in the world who are supposed to care about children? Worse yet, will he internalize the message that because he is male, he is not capable of being entrusted with the care of children? I want my son to know that there are real options for men between the simplified extremes of good father and evil predator.
Article photo: Dionna Raedeke
©2007 L.J. Williamson and Nerve Media
About the Author
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L.J. Williamson is a writer from Los Angeles. Her complaints have been printed in The Los Angeles Times, Salon.com, and Utne, to name a few. She lives with her husband, Monkey Man, and their two children, Fifi Bird
and Sugar Guy. Her website is ljwilliamson.com. |
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