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10 Dumbest Things Said to Me While Out With My Kids

By Devan McGuinness |

I go everywhere with my kids and it’s actually a rare thing to see me out without them. During the summers when the kids are home and the weather is nice you can often find us around our neighborhood, walking and playing outside. We are also frequent visitors to our grocery store, often going every day.

There is no doubt that when I am out with the kids (especially when they were younger) that we would bring some attention to ourselves. I used to walk around with my double stroller and my youngest carried in a wrap around my chest. Now I have three lively kids bopping around me, walking running, full of energy, and happy.

People love to chat with us and the kids bring smiles to the faces of those we greet at the store early in the morning. It’s cute and fun but sometimes people speak before thinking — or at least I hope that’s what’s going on. People really say some strange things to us while out in public.

Click through to read the 10 dumbest things people have actually said to me while out with my kids:

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Stupid Things People Say to Moms

'Did You Plan To Be This Busy?'

I'm asked this question more times than I should be. I don't know if people wonder if my kids are "unplanned twins" or just unplanned. Maybe I look like a person who has no idea how 'sex' works ...
Photo Credit: Accustomed Chaos

:: What is the dumbest thing someone’s said to you while out with your kids? ::

Read more from Devan on Accustomed ChaosUnspoken Grief
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You Look Great in Your Sweatpants: 10 Things Any SAHM Would Love to Hear

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About Devan McGuinness

devanmcguinness

Devan McGuinness

Devan McGuinness is the writer of the lifestyle blog Accustomed Chaos. After surviving 12 miscarriages, Devan founded Unspoken Grief, a resource and support site for perinatal and neonatal loss. Read bio and latest posts → Read Devan's latest posts →

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14 thoughts on “10 Dumbest Things Said to Me While Out With My Kids

  1. Maija @ Maija's Mommy Moments says:

    I am a “relatively” young mom too – 3 kids and I am 32. My eldest is 8 and my youngest is 2 1/2. People ask me all the time how old I am, why I haven’t quit my job yet (since they don’t think I could make more than what daycare costs) oh and my favourite – have I figured out how birth control works yet.

    I’ve been asked all of those questions more than once.

    I have 3 kids, I work full time and yes I understand that birth control is available from my doctor. What’s the big deal????

  2. Becca says:

    While some of these are judgey and/or offensive, in a lot of cases I think you’re being somewhat oversensitive.
    - You must have been young – is a compliment. They’re saying you look young and pretty and even you acknowledge in the next point that it’s not very common these days to have three children (not toddlers) before you turn thirty.
    - I don’t know how you do it – should be taken at face value. They’re admiring your energy and the interaction they see you engage in with your children, and they’re admitting to you that they don’t think they would do as well.
    “Things people say to me that make me angry” seems to be a fairly popular topic, one that every mom blogger gets to eventually, and most of the time I’m left wondering what I could possibly say to a mother that wouldn’t upset her in some way. I feel like outright ignoring all mothers and children that I don’t know already is the wrong response, but this really seems like a can’t win situation.

  3. Nicole says:

    I can relate to most of these as I have 4 kids under 4 :) They are 3, 2, 1, and 1 month old. I get the “Are they all yours?” and “You must have your hands full” comments all day long. People also ask me if the older ones are triplets which I don’t understand at all since maybe my oldest 2 could pass for twins, but the 1 and 3 yr olds are not even close in size! I go everywhere with them and don’t really think it is a big deal, but apparently it is to a lot of people. We live in an expensive area of NJ where 4 kids (forget about 4 kids close in age) is very rare. I just smile and say we are thinking about having 5…that always leaves people not knowing what to say. :)

  4. Tobbie says:

    You are quite the prize.
    How much time have you spent being critical of others,when that time should have been spent enjoying EVERY minute that you have with your children.
    You obviously are too young (as you mentioned far too frequently), to appreciate even HAVING , not one, but many children.

    Who gives a shit what anyone asks you.

    Grow up, you have far too much time on your hands (which is ironic considering how much responsibility you claim to have), to be “blogging” about what people ask you.

    What a very sad example of what type of mother (term used loosely), that you are.

  5. Jess says:

    Wow Tobbie! Harsh much? I’m offended by your comment and it wasn’t even directed toward me. Being irritated by the things people say to you in public does not make a person a bad mother. This blog is a format for mothers to express all stages of motherhood. You make it seem as though mothers who do anything other than raise their children, are bad parents. Get it together Tobbie! While I will admit that all of the above statements don’t bother me in the same way, I can appreciate the discussion. As a mom of two beautiful girls (8 yrs and 2 mos) I also get asked a bunch of nonsense. I.e., “wow, you sure did wait a long time,” and “oh the baby must be a mistake.” Really!?

  6. Devan McGuinness says:

    @Nicole — Ha! That is a good response to people – i might start using that

    @Tobbie — i love you too….

    @Jess — i am convinced people talk before they think things through.

  7. Elsa says:

    I agree dat there r people who just doesn’t know when not 2 talk n 2 keep their opinions 2 themselves. I’ve had 3 csections n d surgery tech has d nerve 2 not whisper, but blatantly comment 2 my nurse why I’m not getting a tubal ligation. Hello- I can hear u! N no, I did not elect d csections, d 1st 2 were emergency due 2 d baby’s well being n d 3rd is due 2 d hospital not allowing a vbac after 2 csections. I can handle my 3 kids, thank u. N yes, d Judgy mcjudgersons can shut it when asking what 2 buy my kids. They deserve a treat every now n then…so if I want 2 buy them each a chocolate bar….I can definitely do so. Mind u, this person does not have children!

  8. deborah says:

    my sister and i are used to get “Are you twins?” all the time. We are only 21 months apart

  9. Ashley says:

    I agree that you’re overreacting to many of these. Especially about looking young and people being in awe of how you do it all. Learn to take a compliment!

  10. mom2four says:

    Well I guess if someone almost 30 with three kids is crazy then book me a spot at the looney bin now! I’m only 27 and have FOUR. 6,4,2, and 6 weeks. I’ve only heard the “I don’t know how you do it” but it was quickly followed by a “I know I couldn’t handle it, kudos to you!” so I took it as a compliment. For me, the dirtiest comments are in the grocery check out or on a forum somewhere when someone learns that my little family is on assistance. Yes, I planned my youngest two children, no, we weren’t on assistance when I conceived. Yes, people actually do lose their jobs and things go downhill where a bit of help is needed. This doesn’t make me a mooch on society or one of the welfare mamas that just pops out kids to stay in the system. My youngest was born on 12/29, my husband lost his job in September. In November, some legal crap started that has made a HUGE dent in our savings and forced us onto assistance. People are WAY too judgemental, especially of large families (and honestly, I don’t see four kids as a “large” family anyway. I’d love to have six!).

  11. melissa says:

    I love your article! I get the same questions….Mine are 5,2,and 1 and I get the question “are they triplets”….what? Or “are the two oldest twins?” I’m “young too!” I was 23 when I had my oldest!
    Ignore others mean comments…I just hope they aren’t raising their own children with SO much hate!

  12. Brandy says:

    I’m 32ish myself with 3 (7, 4 1/2, nearly 2) & I get many of the same comments when I am out. How I react depends on my mood… & my day. But I have to share that the worst comment EVER was a woman who looked at my kids, looked up at me and said with a disgusted look in her face “3? I’m SOOOOOOORRY!” (in reference to the kids.) My response, as I pulled them all closer to me & away from the hideous monster in front of us & responded “Well, I’m not!” Some people don’t realize how much their words can hurt… and I’m sorry for the rude comments we each have received. To Becca: remember HOW you say something is more important than WHAT you say. :-) If you sincerely are complimenting a busy mom, she’ll know it! Don’t give up talking to us!! We need encouragement, too!! :-)

  13. Genevieve says:

    Wow, I would not take offense at any of these, half of them are said in jest and half are compliments! someone saying ‘you are a crap mother’ I would get angry about but what you listed? Never. Grow up

  14. April says:

    Oh dear, I get some of these as a mom of twins. The “I don’t know how you do it” or the “Do they have the same dad?” because mine look nothing alike to be twins.

    The keeping your husband happy one is pretty forward as well!

    Some people!

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