10 Hilarious Careers for Moms

I got my first job when I was 15. I worked in a little boutique selling overpriced kids clothes. Since that entry into the working world, I’ve worked at a library, a horse stable, an amusement park, a doctor’s office, a bookstore, various arts organizations, a public health non-profit and now, at my laptop in my living room tapping out blog posts. I’ve taught in a college classroom, raised money, actied in children’s theatre, managed Congressional communications for a lobbying office, and been a research assistant.

And of course, I’ve been a mom.

I’ve been a stay at home parent for the past two years and will likely keep at it until my younger child is ready for kindergarten. But knowing I’m in this for the long haul doesn’t stop me from speculating what I might do when I return the working world eventually. Sure, I could call my old contacts and see what sort of opportunities are out there in my field. Or…I could explore uncharted territory. I could use the many skills I’ve developed from being a mom – skills in the areas of disinfecting surfaces, dodging Lego obstacle courses, and convincing unwilling children to do horrible, horrible things like picking up their clothes – and translate them into a brand new career. Often, as I go about some mom task, I think about what kind of career would be a good fit for what I’m doing.

I’ve come up with 10 hilarious careers for moms! Click through and see them all!

  • 10 Hilarious Careers For Moms! 1 of 11
    career

    Click through to see them all!

  • Alligator Wrestling 2 of 11
    alligator

    Skill: Wiping a baby's nose

    Holding a baby's arms down with one hand, while dodging flying feet to lean in and get to a nose that's whipping from side to side is JUST LIKE wrestling deadly reptiles.

    Photo credit: photo stock

  • Hostage Negotiator 3 of 11
    swat team

    Skill: Getting kids to try new food

    The delicacy and precision a mom has to use in phrasing a description of a new dish to a picky child is rivaled only by FBI hostage teams. One wrong word and it can all fall apart.

  • Film Critic 4 of 11
    movie

    Skill: Previewing tv and movies before letting kids watch

    Remember in the 1980s when Tipper Gore was outraged by some lyrics and started a whole movement to let parents know about controversial content? Yeah, I get that now.

    Photo credit: photo stock

  • Celebrity Chef 5 of 11
    chef

    Skill: Preparing meals kids will eat

    Any mom who has followed the specifications of a picky and mercurial toddler while also getting adequate nutrition into meals can certainly handle the gluten-free, raw-food, vegan, organic whims of a celebrity.

    Photo credit: photo stock

  • Bus Driver 6 of 11
    bus

    Skill: Shuttling kids to activities

    Driving a bus would actually be better than driving kids because there would be less whining.

    Photo credit: photo stock

  • Life Coach 7 of 11
    guru

    Skill: Cheering on kids

    "Way to go! You can do it! Get up! Try again! WOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" 

    Photo credit: photo stock

  • Crime Scene Technician 8 of 11
    crime scene tape

    Skill: Cleaning up bodily fluids

    If you can hunt down every drop of splashed urine in the bathroom of a potty training child, you can analyze splatter patterns.

    Photo credit: photo stock

  • CDC Director 9 of 11
    haz mat

    Skill: Managing and controlling family disease outbreaks

    I don't know why all Presidents don't appoint moms to head the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Armed with Lysol and hand sanitizer, a good mom could end cold season as we know it.

    Photo credit: photo stock

  • Dolphin Trainer 10 of 11
    dolphin

    Skill: Bath time

    Dolphins probably listen better than kids at bath time. And you don't have to try and dry a dolphin off afterwards.

    Photo credit: photo stock

  • Drill Sergeant 11 of 11
    drill sergeant

    Skill: Directing mornings so every gets out of the house dressed and on time

    "Grab your lunch! Put on your shoes! Hit the potty! Now GO GO GO TO THE CAR!!!!!"

    Photo credit: photo stock

     

Read more from Rebekah at Stay At Home Pundit The Broad SideFollow Rebekah on Facebook and Twitter too!

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