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7 Years Later – I Found My "Focus Photo"

I never had a birth plan, because I’m simply not a planner and I was afraid I’d fixate on this one specific plan and then be devastated if things didn’t go the way I’d hoped.

Actually, that’s not entirely true, because I’m pretty sure the first words I uttered, each of the three times I arrived at the hospital, were “When can I get my epidural? Soon, right?” Because although I intended to be easy breezy about my labor, the one thing I knew FOR SURE was that I wanted an epidural. So, that was my plan: Get an epidural ASAP.

I didn’t bring special music with me, I didn’t have a doula, I never took lamaze classes and I never had a focus item. You know, something you can look at and focus on while you’re having a contraction. Lots of women bring pictures of their other kids, their pet, that Gucci bag their husband promised to get them as a “push present.” Something they love that they can stare and think about that will take their mind off of the pain.

But now, almost 7 years after the first time I gave birth, I feel like I need an item on which to focus.

The big boys are constantly fighting about, or whining about, something. The baby is constantly all up in my grill, or trying to climb something, or diving off of something. I often find myself having to stop, close my eyes, and take a deep breath before I absolutely lose my sh*t.

And then, the other morning, I walked out of the kitchen and found them sitting together. Nicely. There was no kicking, no shoving, no complaining, no arguing. They were even touching! It was a bit of a miracle, so I grabbed my camera to capture the moment for posterity.

Of course, it didn’t last forever and soon enough they were back to pushing each other’s buttons and fighting again.

It’s certainly not the best picture of the three of them, but I don’t care. I’m thinking about having it blown up and then mounting it above the fireplace. That way, when they’re driving me insane, I can sit and focus on it while I do my counting and breathing techniques in an effort to get through the pain of hearing them squawk at each other.

Ah, motherhood…sometimes it’s just like being in labor. Except you can’t get an epidural.

Top Photo Credit: iStock Photo

Read more from Meghan on MeghanGWine and From Demo to Dream.

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