A few blogs back, fellow babble blogger Buzz Bishop penned the blog: Who Looks After Your Kids When You Die? I have a will. I have life insurance. I have a guardian selected to look after JD in the event of my untimely demise and I made this choice based purely on the chick flick, Raising Helen.
Shameless and oh, I am not kidding. Kate Hudson plays single, NYC gal, Helen. She works as an agent at a modeling agency. She parties. She has one-night-stands. She is the last person you’d leave your kid to, but you know what? She is fun, she is loving and she is engaging—her two nieces and one nephew love her. This is why I left JD to …
Uncle Brian. Or should I say, Raising Brian. Helen uses the toaster’s reflection to put on lipstick. I’ve witnessed Brian use a hair dryer to blow up an air mattress—enough said. Still, this was not an easy choice. I felt bad after the will was signed and sealed. I love both my bros.
Here’s the thing: Brian is my soulmate of sorts. We speak the same language, live calm, harmonious lives and Brian is the cool uncle. He spends hours building Lego towns with JD. I tell him to cook a nutritious, delicious meal and instead he takes JD to Burger King and the next day molds, then simmers 40 Swedish meatballs at 1 AM—this is fantastic and strange—AND I LOVE IT. I love that Brian has Disney’s Robin Hood on his computer and more for him, than my kid. He disciplines JD without yelling or getting rattled!
In all honestly though, Carlo’s life is more together than Brian’s—I mean he has a fancy pension. (Probably not as big as Mitt’s—OH!) But this is why I have life insurance and, of course, child support filed with the court. Financially, my child will be taken care of regardless if I’m dead and not bringing home the reduced fat turkey bacon. Besides, Brian has an awesome job. Other than Carlo or Brian, I’d have to leave him to friends (Hi Amy & Ed, hi!). My parents are … old-ish and not in the best health. I can’t leave JD to them. It’s just not appropriate.
In the past five years JD and I have traveled (with Carlo to Hawaii and Bri to California), we have visited museums, we have spent hours laying in the grass at the park, we’ve hiked, we have read, danced, sang, went to plays, planned play-dates and xyz and frankly, I think Brian is a better person to lay in the grass with and describe clouds to.
JD and Bri in California at Aquarium of the Pacific (Bri is carrying my diaper bag. Love him)
Carlo carrying a sleepy JD through the airport in Hawaii. I was having a meltdown about the 11- hour flight home to NJ. True story. Yes.
Brian is Helen. He’s crazy, he’s fun, he’s all over the place. Carlo is Jenny (Joan Cusack). He’s by the book. He’s strict. He’s tidy. Carlo will visit and tell Brian all of the things he is doing wrong and Bri will learn from Carlo’s wisdom, because Brian is rational.
Carlo will play as much a role as Brian, the ink on the will, is my safety net. In many ways I chose Brian to raise JD … because I feel, Carlo has raised me some (he’s always helped me and never let me down) … so we’ll pass the torch to Brian. Sniffle.
But what about JD’s dad? I didn’t alert him to my will because he hasn’t met or visited JD. He has every, legal right to fight for custody of JD if I kick it. And then my insane Italian family will take him to court. But I will be dead, in heaven with Nanny, Brandy and Katelyn—so they can figure it out.
Bottom line: I armed my baby with a rad guardian and money for life, college and investments + five years of blogs to date that showcase our love story. And 6021 images to date, as well. I’m also leaving JD my desk I wrote Rattled! on. OK, this is getting morbid. I must stop typing.
Raising Brian. That’s all.
Fun fact: I stayed out on Sat night with my friend after our date. Bri stayed at my condo with JD. They had pizza and watched a movie. He texted me Sunday morning at 7:15 AM as I was getting ready to come home. “Please don’t die. I woke up to 300 rainbow sprinkles on the living room rug. JD was covering them with a blanket and when I caught him, he said, “Please don’t tell my mom. So, don’t tell him I told you this.”
See, Bri is the cool uncle. It was our lil secret. I’m still finding sprinkles btw.
Who will look after your kids?
More from me!