At What Point do You Check on Other Peoples' Kids?

If we’ve made it this far into parenting we’ve all had other peoples’ kids at our house. And chances are those kids have done something out of the ordinary, gross or strange. I know my kid is guilty of several things under the watchful eyes of another, including losing a tooth and getting pinkeye. But my question is mostly about kids of another gender, in my case boys. I don’t have boys. I didn’t grow up with boys. I don’t get boys.

To prove how much I don’t get boys I will admit to being completely unaware the boys could pee sitting down until I asked someone at 18 how boys went to the bathroom if they had to take care of #1 and #2.

Addie has had little friends sleepover who have wet the bed, not quite made it to the toilet in time and thrown up. I can handle it for the most part. But the other day she had a little boy over to play who went into the bathroom and didn’t come out for a really. long. time. I wouldn’t have noticed but the bathroom is right next to the kitchen where I was getting dinner ready. Addie knocked on the door and asked what was taking so long and I told her to leave him alone.

Then I started to wonder what he was doing in there.

Who knows what happens in the bathroom with 7 year old boys.

I started to wonder if I should check on him. But what if it was something boy-ish? Would that be weird if I attended to him? Did he need help but he was too scared to ask me? Should I call his mom? Should I ask if he needs anything? Obviously this boy and I are not tight aside from exchanging pleasantries when he comes over or when he tells me about his own baby brother. He finally came out after about 15 minutes, washed his hands and went on his merry way playing with Addie. I forgot about the “situation” and went about my duties. It wasn’t until later when Cody used the bathroom that I remembered what had happened earlier.

Turns out the kid had multiple things to attend to in the bathroom and one was done in a seated position while the other was performed standing and resulted in some serious missing.

Why didn’t he just sit it all out? I asked Cody. What resulted was a conversation that made me even happier that I get to be a girl and potty train girls.

The…mess…was cleaned up and I’m left wondering if maybe he has to sit at home but decided to go all maverick at my house with the standing? Maybe he has a stool? Maybe he was nervous?

I DON’T GET BOYS.

I don’t even know if I should tell his mom or not. That would be a weird conversation, but maybe it’s something she’d like to know? I don’t want to embarrass the kid, but at the same time I don’t want to have to don a hazmat suit to take care of the aftermath when he comes over to play. I like this kid, he’s nice to my kid.

So what does one do in such a situation? Am I the only mom out there that is *this* clueless about boys?

(Disclaimer: I have never seen a boy go to the bathroom. Ever. Not my husband, not a boyfriend, not nobody. And that is the way it shall remain until forced against my will to deal with such a situation.)

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