I did it to save money, plain and simple. My bloggy sistah Danielle wrote about whether preschool should be free; my pocketbook is going to go with a resounding yes on this one. My greatest fear was that I’d suck at homeschooling. Now, three months later I’m here to proclaim that I indeed suck at homeschooling.
I think I figured out why:
1. Home is where the Wii is. And the iPad. And the TV. And the toys. And the snacks. – Every day I’d prepare a beautiful and fun (or so I thought) lesson. BooBoo would begrudgingly sit down and the floodgates of irritating questions would open: How long do we have to do this? Can I play the Wii? Can I have a snack? Are we done yet? Every letter trace, every number game, every craft project was viewed as some malicious form of child abuse. Who knew making a hand-print wreath could cause such psychological damage? Not I.
2. Home is lonely. With his brother in school all day, BooBoo was lonely – so very, very lonely. A few weeks ago I asked him to draw a picture of himself with his friends to which he replied, “I don’t have any friends.” Yeah, that stung.
3. Home is where Mom is. I don’t want to say it’s me but it is. BooBoo has shown a million times over how good he is at following directions and behaving properly for anyone other than his mom.
4. I didn’t have a solid plan. Successful homeschooling begins and ends with an educational plan and truthfully, I didn’t spend the time or energy to create one. I needed to create opportunities for my child to socialize and engage with other children and surround myself with a homeschooling community.
I began to notice my once social and happy son becoming a withdrawn child who wanted to stay in his jammies indoors all day long. This just wasn’t my kid.
It was clear that BooBoo needed preschool; it no longer mattered if we could afford it.
Last week I licked my wounds, accepted the truth and enrolled him in preschool three days a week part-time. I’m choosing not to view this decision as a personal failure, but rather a change of plans. I’m already beginning to see glimmers of his formal social self reemerge, proving to me that I made the right decision.
To those of you who homeschool, I bow down. It takes a special person with unwavering commitment to the cause. Maybe I’m just not that mom, but maybe (just maybe) that’s OK.
Have you done homeschooling? Sound off!
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