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Motherhood Means Always Being the Vomit Parent

file5671284825281If I had a dime for every vomit story I had with my three children, chances are I would be a lot more well off than I am now. Between the grocery store, our local diner,  multiple episodes in the car, and of course just in the comfort of our living room… there is a story for everyone!

But the other night when we had, yet again, a vomit emergency in our house I realized something. No matter who tries to help your child when they are sick, whether it is a father, stranger, or even their grandfather, they only want one person.

Mommy.

And by default, magically I am the parent always dealing with vomit. Mommy McVomit should seriously be my new name.

Sometimes I can sub out the task of clean-up to someone else, which is pretty sweet because that is probably the worst part of the incident itself.

Years ago I used to be worthless when it came to sick kids. Seriously. I feel bad looking back on the way I handled our first flu bug, which was nothing short of a clip from a Hollywood movie.

I remember thinking of Vince Vaughn in Four Christmases screaming

“I’M GONNNA DO IT TOOOOO!  OH MY GOD!  I’M GONNNA DO IT TOO!”

While holding back my tears and trying to control my own gag reflex. I certainly was not cut out for the gross part of motherhood.

But years later, I guess vomit is just something I am used to dealing with. My husband will try and step up to take on the project when someone comes down with something, but everyone always wants to snuggle up with mommy when all is said and done. Which I don’t mind. If there is one thing being the vomit master has taught me, it is the amazing immune system you can build. HA! (Talk about finding a silver lining, right?)

No matter how upset I may be about a three-year-old vomiting down my back during dinner (Yes, that really has happened to me. Straight down the back!), or what kind of a scene we may make in the produce department of the grocery store (Yes, extremely gross and embarrassing as well!), I’ve just come to deal with the fact that being a mother means always being the parent dealing with vomit.

When your children get sick, do they prefer one parent over the other?

Photo Credit: Morguefile

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