My Children Each Have a Favorite Parent — And I'm Okay with ThatMeghan Gesswein
My boys, these crazy kids who run my life, totally play favorites when it comes to my husband and me. It’s funny because I spend my days being very careful to not play favorites, even though, at any given time I am likely to really like one of them better than the others. This is especially true of the baby when he’s napping, or of my oldest when he’s quietly watching a video on the iPad, or of my middle guy when he’s, for a moment, not being a complete pain in the a*s.
But while I am careful to not let my preferences show, the kids have no qualms whatsoever about openly preferring one parent over the other.
Zachary will, without question, choose me over his father for pretty much everything. He is quick to kiss, hug and snuggle with me first (and often last), and will openly admit to “liking” me more. His older brother, on the other hand, is obviously a daddy’s boy and will often choose a seat next to dad, ask to join his dad on outings, and will agree with his dad about most topics without giving it a second thought. The youngest is, as of late, a nice mix of the two. Being a baby/toddler, he’s spent the vast majority of his almost two years preferring me, for obvious reasons. Lately, though, he’s discovered the joys of his dad and, when we’re all together, spends equal amounts of time on both our laps.
If we wanted to, my husband and I could easily resent the boys, and even each other, for their perceived slight. But the reality of the situation is that, even though they might currently prefer one of us over the other, they obviously love us both to the moon and back. We know that our relationship with each of them is solid, and it is likely that over the years, their preferences will switch back and forth between us as often and as easily as the wind changes its direction.
As we ride the crazy wave that is this thing we call parenting, we’ll take the ups with the downs, and make sure our kid know that we love them all no matter what, even if they might not feel exactly the same way about us all the time.
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