My Kids Have No Idea What Boredom Is
One thing I remember about childhood is being absolutely bored. I had lots of fun, too. I climbed trees and swam in ditches and imagined things, like friends.
But even in a rather idyllic childhood there were (what seemed like) large stretches of boredom.
I don’t think my kids have ever truly been bored. They fast forward through commercials and watch any show or movie they like on demand.
People my age reminisce about getting up early for Saturday cartoons but my kids would never do that. It doesn’t even make sense other than as some quaint old-timey ritual because now cartoons are always on.
I loved my grandparents and I enjoyed visiting them but the time period after dinner at their house was so painfully boring I took up reading Reader’s Digest at the age of 8. That’s literally all there was to do. There seemed to be nothing on their TV and no toys to play with except for an old ukelele that belonged to my mother which was only brought out on rare occasions. I remember sitting and staring at the walls of their house for, like, 5 hours.
Now grandparents are fun and have toys and try to win over their grandkids with treats and activities. My mom has a whole basement full of more toys for my kids to play with when we visit than I had my whole life. I know this because my old toys are a part of this collection–a very small part.
School was boring too. They didn’t care what your “learning style” was. They weren’t trying to teach us in our preferred way of learning. Learning was your problem. The most thrilling thing you had to look forward to was a film strip. That’s pictures that don’t even move, folks. It’s kind of like cave drawings and it was the highlight of our week. And if you couldn’t pay attention, if there was some kind of attention deficit on your part you certainly didn’t get to take drugs. That, too, was your problem.
My kids’ schools are equipped with Promethean boards. If I had seen one of those at my elementary school I would have had no choice but to believe in magic. Teachers feel like they have failed if kids today are bored in class. I was bored in class every day of my school career.
Which is all to say, what do you think the implications on our kids will be? I know my attention span has shrunk. My capacity to wait has disappeared. I pass time–seconds, actually-checking my phone so I don’t get bored. I wonder what the effect is on kids who may never actually feel boredom.
What do you think? How will the constant stimulation play out as our kids get older?
More of my writing at Kid Scoop:
10 Things to Stock Up on For Sick Days
Read my blog, Every Day I Write the Book
This is a great point! When I was a kid, my school had a “gifted-and-talented” program, but that only lasted about an hour out of every day. So, yes, I remember being bored much of the school day — and I remember complaining to my mom about it. Her response: “Well, you should still listen to the teacher because it’s good to review things, even if you THINK you already know them. You might be doing something wrong and not even know it. Plus, the review helps it stick in your mind better.” In other words –if I was bored, it was my fault for having a bad attitude! Also, guess what: When you grow up and get a job, you’ll be bored during meetings. Having a good attitude and realizing it’s not all about you are great skills for kids to learn.
Interesting thoughts. I too spent what seemed like a lot of my childhood bored and feel that my kids are rarely asked to wait for anything or just be still. It worries me (when I remember) that I belong to a religion that highly values stillness and contemplation and yet during the week they rarely see me (or any other adults?) model this. Lately I’ve been forcing myself not get out the phone when I “don’t have anything to do.” It is hard, especially if you are in public waiting for something, you feel like the least important person in the world just sitting there staring like an idiot while everyone else is clearly doing highly productive work on their phones.
Tangentially, I also resorted to regularly reading Readers Digest at the grandparents house out of desperation (their tv only received Lawrence Welk.) I blame it for my irrational fear of wildlife because they always had stories about miraculous escapes from wildlife danger.
I think one of the great things about boredom is that it fosters imagination and problem solving. In the long run, i don’t think its really beneficial for our kids to not experience boredom. Why is it that we must constantly be “entertained” ? I fear it will lead to an increased amount of disappointment in adult life, and no ability to handle delayed gratification. Persistence, patience, long-term goal oriented thinking (as opposed to immediate gratification), are what make successful adults. Furthermore, constant media is simply passive entertainment. Its nothing more. We are training our kids (and ourselves, for that matter) to rely too heavily on pre-manufactured input, as opposed to critical thinking. That cannot possibly bode well, IMO.
Great points, Jelena.
Great topic! I was bored a lot as a kid. I remember one summer in particular when my mom had jury duty for over a month. We were used to a mom who stayed home, so this was the first time us kids were on our own. And, we didn’t have cable or anything like that, so we only had the three basic t.v. channels. During that month it was the Iran-Contra hearings! We about died of boredom.
I fear my kids don’t get enough boredom in their lives. Only at church, really. I do believe it lends itself to an increased desire for instant gratification and tons of stimulus. Yikes!
I agree with Jelena. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my own “free time” and how I spend it – if I have a small moment, I usually whip out my phone to check SOMETHING, and by the time I’ve checked all my somethings I either have something to do or I can just make the rounds again. I feel a need to stop finding disctractions, actually sit with my own thoughts, and feel comfortable in my own skin (sans entertainment). It isn’t that easy, that’s for sure. The few times I’ve actually done this I feel like I’m grasping at straws for a decent thought process outside of judging/laughing at tweets/grams/statuses/pins.
I know exactly what you mean, Mary. I do the same thing.