On Feeling Like a FailureMeghan Gesswein
This mothering thing? Is really hard sometimes. It’s a challenging job on a good day, but my typical lack of patience coupled with the amount of sleep I haven’t had had in the past few months is making it even more difficult than usual.
I have no patience with my kids lately. Not all of the time, but enough that I’m starting to feel guilty about how much time I spend annoyed with them. It doesn’t help that the 6 year old’s penchant for drama is only getting more pronounced, the 4 year old has developed a knack for lying, and Oliver, the 1 year old, has been screaming for, what seems like, every second of the past month.
It is beginning to wear on me.
I like my children. I adore my children. Even when I’m so mad at them I can’t see straight, I still love them more than any other person on the planet. But lately, there are times that I’ve thought about throwing my hands up in the air and walking out the door without looking back. Not for forever. But a nice, quiet meal followed by an evening of uninterrupted TV time, no tushies to wipe, and a full night of sleep is pretty darn inviting.
My kids, as good as they are, are always going to be challenging in one way or another. I am always going to be lacking in patience. Hopefully one day soon I won’t be utterly exhausted.
I know I can’t be the only mom out there who is feeling overwhelmed. I know I can’t be the only mom out there who feels like she needs a break. But sometimes it feels like I am, and it makes me feel like I’ve failed my children somehow.
I know “this too shall pass” but lately I’m wondering…when?
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