Raw Sewage Isn't Exactly What I Had in MindMeghan Gesswein
Which is to say that in my mind, I wasn’t hoping that every toilet and shower in our house would back up on Saturday night and result in a nasty, stinky mess. I’m not a fan of candles or scented oils, but I can assure you, if I was going to pick one, it would not be “Eau de Raw Sewage.” I’d go with “Wet Dog” or “Rotten Eggs” first. Obviously.
It wasn’t a completely horrible situation, though. It actually turned into a somewhat fun adventure.
It all started when the toilet became clogged in the bathroom that we all use. Then the shower in that same bathroom stopped draining. Because it was super convenient, and these things always happen at the same time, I suddenly had to pee like it was going out of style. Fortunately for me, there’s a bathroom in the garage. A bathroom that I normally avoid using at all costs because it’s a) gross and b) the walls are potentially going to fall down at any moment (it will be completely removed eventually), but desperate times call for desperate measures.
As soon as I opened the door to the garage I knew we were in trouble. There was a…stench. Upon further examination we realized that every toilet and shower in the house had backed up. And because we’re in the process of remodeling the main and master bathrooms, there are no toilets in place in those locations, so there was nothing to contain the overflow. Raw sewage was flowing down my hallway.
My oldest son freaked out. He was worried that he had caused the back up (he’d been the last one to use the toilet), but he was more concerned that our entire house was going to be flooded in poo. Which, I totally don’t blame him for. All of the news footage he’s ever seen of flooding has been horrific and in his anxious little mind, the sewage was going to continue to flow and overtake our entire home.
After calming him down and reassuring him that the damage would be psychological and not physical, putting our wet/dry shop vac to good use (may it rest in peace), and spraying the floors with an entire bottle of bleach, we decided that our only option was to pack up and have a sleepover at Grandma and Grandpa’s house. They have heat and working plumbing, so it was an obvious choice.
It was fun to make little beds with chairs and blankets, and then hunker down in the living room for the night. The next morning we returned home and were relieved to find that things had improved. The stench was gone and there were no obvious signs of any back up. We called a plumber and he had the clog removed and our pipes running smoothly within 20 minutes.
It was certainly not the greatest of circumstances, and aside from having to get up close and personal with raw sewage, it turned into a pretty fun evening. It’s certainly a story that we’ll be reminiscing about for years to come.
Photo via Morgue File
Read more from Meghan on MeghanGWine and From Demo to Dream.
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