Of course, this is a gag card, but I don’t doubt some rightfully-so pissed off single moms waiting on child support arrears to show up, or those that are fed up answering the questions: “Do I have a dad?” and “Where does my dad live?” or “Can I call my dad?” might send a little something sweet this Father’s Day.
Maybe a handprint of the child’s hand (that’s gotta burn). Maybe a “F*ck you, f*cker!” love note. A dirty diaper Fed-Ex. (This isn’t my deadbeat dad gift guide FYI.)
I don’t send anything to JD’s father. Two reasons:
Uh, he never sent JD anything in his life.
JD never asked to send him a Father’s Day gift. If he ever did—we’d discuss.
So, I was at Target this morning buying some household provisions and two gifts for birthday parties JD is attending this weekend. (There goes my weekend!)
After getting some Ninja Turtle art kits, I stopped for gift bags and tissue paper, then found myself perusing the Father’s Day card section.
I was drawn to a little boy and his father with the surf breaking at their feet. The sun was setting. It made me smile and I picked it up, because I wanted to get it for my brother Carlo Jr., who is JD’s Godfather and a straight up father-figure to my son.
Even though JD, doesn’t call Carlo by the dad moniker, the image just seemed appropriate. We spend the summer at Carlo’s condo down in Bradley Beach, NJ and if I looked through the 6,000 photos on my computer, I could probably find one like this, ah:
Then I opened the card. And realized it wasn’t the best choice for my awesome big brother.
Have a nice weekend! XO
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