I used to be a pretty carefree and easy going person. I would drop anything for a good time and would get to the important stuff later on. People and relationships were always more important to me than tasks. In fact, task-people bugged me. Why can’t they just chill a bit and enjoy their life? But no, they were always on to the next task, tediously checking off item by item and finding their own personal satisfaction with each check. It never looked very fun and they never looked very happy.
This morning my daughter was trying to tell me a funny story about her friends, but she only had 2 minutes before carpool came to pick her up for school and she didn’t have her shoes on or teeth brushed or backpack ready. I was rushing her along and honestly not listening to a word she was saying because she needed to get moving. I was more worried about making the carpool late than I was my own daughter.
Oh my gosh people…have I become that dreaded task person? Do I care more about what needs to be done that who I’m doing it with?
How did this happen? Where did that carefree person go?
Yesterday, I wanted to be “funny, fun, carefree mommy.” But my toddler decided to wake up at midnight and play around until 4 in the morning. My son forgot to lift the lid to the toilet resulting in an ocean of pee drowning the entire floor. Later, my naked toddler peed on the newly cleaned carpet, while simultaneously my son choked on something and spit all over the same clean carpet. Carrot juice got spilt on homework, my daughter called home sick from school, and the hits just kept coming. I was laughing but only to keep from crying. Maybe that’s how it happens. Between tired and pee, it’s hard to be funny and carefree. It’s days like that I find myself mumbling…Seriously?
Seriously. Motherhood is serious business but does it mean that we have to be so serious all the time? Did I have to bury my fun self to become a mother?
This was a topic of discussion last night when I had some friends and fellow mothers over for our monthly Power of Moms Learning Circle (get-together). We discuss motherhood and topics relating to it. This month’s topic was all about staying true to our “fun selves.” The nine of us laughed for hours and shared our own secrets on how to not take life so seriously and keep it fun for everyone, including ourselves. Let’s face it, when mom’s happy, everyone’s happy!
Here were their secrets. If you’ve become too serious, take notes!
1. Find ways to have fun with your kids. One of my friends does “Donut Tuesdays” with her kids. They all look forward to Tuesdays. Kids are fun! They can definitely help us ditch our serious side.
2. Schedule time for fun with friends, spouse, partner. We all agreed that we need to go on dates and spend time with our friends and loved ones. It’s not easy to do sometimes because we’re busy, but it’s worth it.
3. Ditch the to-do list once in a while and replace it with a to-be list. Include people you want to-be with in your day and include the person you want to-be on that list. If the task list doesn’t have to be done, ignore it once in awhile. Turn up the music, play Little People on the floor with your kids and stop scrubbing the scum on the tub.The scum isn’t going anywhere, it will welcome you with open arms tomorrow, I’m sure. Kids on the other hand, will be gone one day.
4. Do something that you love. Hey, we all have our things we like to do. So, do them! And if you don’t have a hobby or something you do besides work and rear children, than find one!
5. Ditch the, “But I’m tired and I’m too busy” mantra that keeps you from having fun. No more excuses.
6. Laugh about the crap that happens instead of gripe. So what? You have to swim in an ocean of pee sometimes, could be worse!
So, stop being so serious and have some fun with whatever you do in the day. And if you’ve become a task person like I have, put “Have fun” and “Stop being so serious” on your list!
Has motherhood made you too serious?
Read more from Mandy at mush.
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