It was Show and Tell Day at my son’s kindergarten class this week. The assignment: bring something that represents your family.
He wanted to bring a Lego piece. He wanted to bring his Darth Vader mask. We settled on him bringing an Eiffel Tower. I proposed to my wife at the top of the Eiffel Tower, and he was there. It was the place our family became a little more ‘official.’
Had the theme been more wide open, my son could have brought his rock collection. On each of our family’s travels we try to collect a small stone or pebble from the adventure. The collecting has expanded to include my globetrotting retired parents, who brought home my son some stones from their safari in Africa.
Reddit had teachers sounding off on some of the terrible tales kids have told during Show and Tell assignments.
Here are some of the worst:
Show And Tell 1 of 15Teachers and students confess to some of the worst items kids have ever brought for Show and Tell.
Balut 2 of 15"I taught science in a particularly diverse area outside of DC. To have some fun teaching inherited vs environmental traits, I asked my middle school students to bring in some food from their respective cultures to share with the rest of the class to show that our tastes in food are environmental. One Vietnamese student brought in warm, shelled, fertilized chicken eggs (Balut) to share with the class. He and I cracked a couple, showed them to the class, and ate them. I had one kid promptly faint, 3 kids start crying, and the rest sat in stunned silence or awe. It got the point across, though, and I don't remember anyone missing questions relating to traits that year.
I had seen them before on TV and this sweet kid came in with them to show the class. I really didn't want to eat one, but I wanted the kid to feel comfortable. His intent was not to gross the class out and was genuinely excited to share with the class. I didn't want him to become the kid that ate weird sh--, so I joined him. The taste wasn't all that bad from what I remember. But the texture. Oh god the texture." - Authigenic
Image via Wikipedia
Piggies 3 of 15"My uncle is a farmer, and when I was in preschool, he brought in a lamb and a baby pig for me to show and tell. The pig ran EVERYWHERE and the lamb took a shit on the carpet. My classmates thought it was a riot, and my teacher was pissed. I don't think that preschool even does show and tell anymore." - DJHashMaze
Image via Kabsik Park
Brains 4 of 15"When I was in the 6th grade I had a biology project dealing with the nervous system and the brain. One of my sister's classmate's parents who lived a few houses over from us were both nuerologists. Long story short they loan me an actual human brain contained in what was essentially a heavy duty medical ziplock bag. Anwyay, I showed up to class with my poster board and a shoebox containing a fucking HUMAN BRAIN in my backpack. After the initial reaction from the class the teacher let kids come up and touch it (through the plastic)." - Opfailicon
Image via Hatchibombator
Goldfish 5 of 15"We had show and tell on Fridays every other week. I brought in my goldfish every show and tell for two years." - PenelopePeril
Image via Tim Olson
Snake in a Pillowcase 6 of 15"So, I'm in school as a kid, and this guy Jimmy brings in a bag. This pillow case looking thing, nothing that sticks out as too special.
Then he reaches in the bag, and out comes the biggest snake I've ever seen. Now, this could be because I was a little kid, but christ on a cross. It's like the thing could smell the fear in the classroom, cause it tried to fight its way out of Jimmy's hands. He said he found it at the bus stop that morning, and had the bright idea to grab a bag and bring it to school.
Best part? Same kid did the same thing in seventh grade. Pillow case, snake." - ElPrezidenteReagan
Image via Mikelehen
Vibrating Stick 7 of 15"Some kid brought a little "vibrate-stick" in one day when I was back in 1st grade. I now know it was a [sex toy]." - Douteux
Image via Rachel Kramer
Shotgun 8 of 15"In Kindergarten, I brought in my .410 Pump-Action Shotgun. The office had to make sure it was unloaded, and they held onto it until Show & Tell. My parents had to drop it off and pick it up, I wasn't allowed to carry it around school.
And yes, if you must know, I grew up in Texas." - ronearc
Image via Emily Allen
Baby Sister 9 of 15"When I was in kindergarten I brought in my eight-month-old sister (my father brought her to my school and took her home after). I pulled her around the classroom as she sat in a plastic red wagon. Looking back that was an odd show-and-tell idea." - thatboatguy
Image via Liz Marie
Polaroid 10 of 15"Just asked my step-dad for his best memory. He said a kid brought in a Polaroid of his mom giving his dad a [sex act]. I miss Polaroids." - Drizaya
Image via brianbgv
Hornet’s Nest 11 of 15"When I was in 3rd grade a girl brought in a "empty" hornets nest. Turned out it wasn't completely empty hilarity ensued." - CanonHead
Image via Jason Hollinger
Bud 12 of 15"When I was in 2nd grade everyone had to give a report on a state and mine was Missouri. My "famous resident" was my uncle and my "state product" was Budweiser. I brought a full can." - wewaysawin
Image via shht
Other Bud 13 of 15"I was raised by hippies. In kindergarten, we were supposed to bring something "special" for show and tell. The only thing I knew of that was "special", was "daddy's special herbs" that I wasn't supposed to touch. So, I put a little plant in my backpack, and presented "daddy's special herbs" at show and tell.
I remember my teacher asking me "what kind of herb" the plant was, and I remember saying "...the special kind". Luckily, my teacher had no idea what the plant was.
I felt really lame that day, for bringing a plant to show and tell. When I got home, I got the only spanking I ever received. In fact, 28 years later, I'm still in trouble for that show and tell assignment." - Strawberry_Poptart
Image via R0bz
Punch Me 14 of 15"I don't remember this very well but according to my parents and my aunt and uncle, my cousin brought me in for show and tell when I was 5 because you could punch me in the stomach and I wouldn't cry. After he hit me all the other kids asked if they could too. The teacher nearly had a heart attack. I think my cousin was 10 at the time." - McTokesalot
Image via Richard North
Eiffel Tower 15 of 15Looking through that list, my son bringing a model of the Eiffel Tower isn't all that bad! lol.
Image via Buzz Bishop