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To Hopeful Girls on Valentine's Day: Boys Are Oblivious

samwithturkeylegMoms, tell your daughters this for me. If they are in grade school (or watch TV commercials) they may start to have romantic notions about Valentine’s Day. I certainly did.

Every year I eagerly anticipated Valentine’s Day and hoped a boy (any boy, really) would give me something special. Every year I was disappointed. Your daughters will be, too. And here’s why. For boys, Valentine’s Day is not about love—It’s about candy.

I never knew this until I had sons of my own. I never had brothers, so I had no idea that boys were so oblivious. They don’t think about girls as much as girls think about boys. Because I never got any special valentines, I thought no boys liked me. And they didn’t! But that’s OK. They would later.

I have a 15-year-old son and a 10-year-old son and I can NOT BELIEVE I was ever in love with 12-year-old boys when I was 12 and—more than that—I expected them to reciprocate. This notion horrifies me now. You mean, those boys I fantasized about marrying had just started to wear deodorant and still watched cartoons like, every day?

It’s so weird that every year I hoped to get a Valentine. It was disappointing then, but now I know that boys just don’t do that or think like that. They are completely oblivious. It would have made me feel better to know that when I was a kid. I’m sure there is someone—probably someone very nice—who is in love with my son and thinks that maybe he will give her a special valentine. He won’t. I hope she has brothers and understands but if she doesn’t, here’s what I would tell her: Don’t take it personally.

Maybe there are some romantic little dudes out there. Maybe your daughter will get roses or a sweet note. But if she does, I’d be worried its from an oversexed boy who watches way too much TV. I’m just saying. Happy Valentine’s Day.

Read more of my writing at Babble and at my blog, Every Day I Write the Book.

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How I Scared My Kids with a Fanciful Valentine’s Day Creation

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