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What Parents of Only Children Want You to Know

The moment you have your first child, people are forever asking when you’re going to have another. As an only child, I’m insulted by the implication that having one child is somehow unnatural.

I always thought I’d have one child. One child felt natural to me and my heart yearned for nothing more, that was until I suffered a miscarriage from an unplanned pregnancy. I wouldn’t be the first woman to admit a miscarriage changed her heart, and mine did, resulting in the blessing of a second child. But that’s just my story.

Whether by choice or by circumstance, plenty of people have only children. As difficult as it might be for people with siblings to understand, having one child isn’t unfair, or mean, and it sure as hell isn’t wrong. Whether you’ve been blessed as the parent of one or many, every family is worthy of respect.

I reached out to parents of only children in an effort to share their voice. Check out what they had to say after the jump!


  • I chose my mental health 1 of 8
    I chose my mental health
    "I have a history of depression and the ppd I experienced after our daughter was born was enough to make the decision for me. Also, my husband was deployed from three months into the pregnancy until she was a week old. I can't/won't do it alone again. The fact that he's active duty means he can't control how long he can be home."
    via Amanda
    Photo credit: Shutterstock
  • I don’t want to start over 2 of 8
    I don't want to start over
    "Originally I wanted two kids. We had my son just after I got out of the military and my husband got out a year later. I wanted the kids to be about 2-3 years apart however, at that point, we were broke and both full time students. We didn't think it would be the responsible thing to do. Now that we are in a position to have another one, my son is now 10 and I don't want to go through the diapers, bottles and daycare again. Sometimes I wish he had a sibling but sometimes I like only having one to buy for and deal with when he is being dramatic."
    via Sandy
    Photo credit: Shutterstock
  • We made the right decision for us 3 of 8
    We made the right decision for us
    "I have always vacillated between wanting a houseful and wanting an Only. My husband and I decided, while we were expecting our son, that we could afford to take good care of, and provide for a single child. Daycare costs alone made us wonder how we could have more than one! There was a spell, about a year ago, that we wondered if we had made the right decision, and I often worry that our son will feel the pressure of parent care that I feel as an only-child, but then we end up in situations watching siblings beat the tar out of each other, or watching adult siblings fight to the relationship-death over estates and we look at each other with relief. We made the right decision for our family. We have an amazing little boy, and I'm glad he doesn't have to share us."
    via Lane The Outside Lane
    Photo credit: Shutterstock
  • Life had other plans 4 of 8
    Life had other plans
    "Sometimes you just end up single and the decision is made for you!"
    via Kadie Simply Starting Over
    Photo credit: Shutterstock
  • We’re lucky 5 of 8
    We're lucky
    "Some of us feel lucky we get to have one, because it looked like we might have none."
    @TragicSandwich via Twitter Tragic Sandwich
    Photo credit: Shutterstock
  • I can stay home 6 of 8
    I can stay home
    "One and done for me! I can afford to stay home, and put him in whatever classes and sports he wants. I wouldn't be able to do that with two kids, couldn't afford two college educations, and wouldn't be able to take two kids on vacations or travel. With one we get more freedom to live the way we want, and the best part is being a stay at home mom. 100% of my time goes to my son."
    via Frankie
    Photo credit: Shutterstock
  • It’s a personal choice 7 of 8
    It's a personal choice
    "My decision to have 1 child is not a judgment of your decision to have many. It's right for our family."
    @OttMomGo via Twitter Tales of life with a girl on the go
    Photo credit: Shutterstock
  • We dedicate time 8 of 8
    We dedicate time
    "One-and-done, first by choice, and by the time I came around it was impossible. Having her has been a huge blessing and my husband and I really dedicate TIME to her. That was something my hubby and I didn't get much of in big families."
    via Eloisa
    Photo credit: Shutterstock

Do you have an only child? What would you like us to know?

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More on Kid Scoop:

What Single Parents Want You to Know

15 Things You Should Never Say to an Adoptive Parent

8 Things You Should Never Say to a Mom of Boys

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