“Sure he’s a looker, but does he do diapers?” That’s a question that should cross every girl’s mind. Sure, it’s important if he’s financially secure or if he’s a hard worker, but the deal-breaker question should be: Does he do diapers?
Okay, so I”m exaggerating a bit, but only a tad bit.
I remember the first time I saw his light blue eyes. I was mesmerized. Seriously, I thought he was gorgeous. Little did I know that he was interested in me, so becoming friends wasn’t hard. We got to know each other and I quickly realized he was a solid good guy. He had values, determination, faith, a strong work ethic, honesty … but I still wasn’t hooked.
What kept me around was the first time I saw him around his nephews. Amigas, that’s when I knew he’s the real deal. He didn’t blow them off to hang out with me, even though I secretly wished we got some time alone. He was Uncle Ben, and he took that title seriously. I’m glad I stuck around because …
I married that gorgeous, blue-eyed man! Though I found an amazing man, husband, and father, the reality is that we aren’t the perfect couple nor are we the perfect parents. But dang, he’s a good daddy. I love that my babies’ daddy is present, involved, and a wonderful example to them. And just for the record, he does know how to change a diaper or two.
I asked some of my mom friends to share with us what makes men “daddy,” and this is what they shared. Enjoy!
What Makes Men “Daddy”:
First, I’ll chime in about my dad.
Mi papi has always believed in me. When I first started baking, he was the only one that ate my first batch of cookies that tasted like glue. Now that’s love!
He is intentional with our children. He looks for opportunities to spend time with them and invest in them. He takes them to the donut shop every Friday. He goes out to toss a football in the street in front of our house. He even volunteered to be our teenager’s cabin leader this week.
Being a big kid himself. He loves playing with the kids and playing the games and with the toys, too.
— Jaime from Frogs and Snails and Puppy Dog Tails
Things to look for in a hubby:
A heart for God
A fabulous sense of humor …
These are so important in a husband because your sons will emulate him and your daughter will look for a man like him …
— Rosemond from Big Hair and Books
He reads with the kids, and that takes a whole lot of patience.
— Jodie from Growing Book by Book
Look for patience, intelligence, and a sense of humor. DH Mike has all three, and he is a wonderful dad!
— Maryann from Mama Smiles
Look for a man who has a goal in his life (not a material one, but a personal one: spiritual, talents to develop, etc.), who has good moral values, and wants to have kids!
— Eolia from La Cite des Vents
My husband Michael is a godly father because he is here, continually, for his children. He is involved in their lives — big and small. He reads to them and prays with them every night, guiding them as they talk to God. Someone once told us “Listen to the small things from your children when they are small and they will share with you the big things when they are older.”
— Michelle from St. Lois
A good father is someone who despite being busy tries to make time for his family. It is not the quantity that matters but the quality. Even if it is a story before bedtime or a breakfast together or a simple stroll in the park once a week. Someone who is committed to his family and puts his family as a priority.
— Varya from Creative World of Varya
A good man is often a good father. Because if the man is committed, dedicated, loving, caring, patient, full of virtue and values and faith — how could he NOT be a wonderful father?
— Christine from The Mom Cafe
My favorite quality about my husband is that he’s an amazing father-figure; he’s always teaching him new things, whether it’s a new game, sport, or learning activity. He teaches him to never give up and to keep trying even when he doesn’t succeed the first time. I love seeing them together, especially when my son is trying to copy and be just like his daddy!
— Jackie from I Heart Arts and Crafts
My husband told me (and I agree) that it is not the woman’s role to raise kids — it is the parent’s role, together.
— Becky from Your Modern Family
A good dad loves kids and finds great pleasure in being in the moment with them, being into the things they are into. He’s also someone who is a great leader (setting a good example via his actions rooted in morals and values) and supporter (listening, comforting).
— Stephanie from InCultureParent
A great dad isn’t afraid to show emotion and affection, will let his inner child come out, is a partner at parenting, and is a great role model.
— Sara from Mom Endeavors
Caring, patient, and family-oriented. A man who takes care of his mother will be a man who will take care of his wife and children. I saw it with my own father as well as my husband.
— Carrie from Crafty Moms Share
I grew up with a dad that gave us all that we needed — education, clothing, studies — but he was always traveling. I married a man that is always by my kiddo’s side. He is patient, funny, and sometimes he is a child himself. I do not hold any bad feelings towards my dad; I suppose my dad was always worried that we had all the things we needed. But my husband is more worried about the spiritual side and soul side of my kiddos and myself. He is also a good provider.
A good father is someone who cares about his family and loves his wife and children. But I think the most important thing is that he’s a good person.
— Olga from The European Mama
I grew up in an abusive household. I would have wished for a dad that was a good listener, one that valued spending time doing little things with me. And one who was ready to see that all children have to find their own way, that they are not “wish-fulfillers” for their parents, but people who will grow and blossom in their own unique and beautiful way. I would have hoped for a dad that could not “make it all better” but one who vowed to stand by me until the light shined through. Sigh!