My Halloween was fine, I think. I was so busy running around like a meth-fueled squirrel coordinating the holiday for my offspring, that I barely remember how it went. Nobody cried and I confiscated all the Pixie Stix before my kids even realized they had them, so I call it an epic win for mommy.
It was with guilty pleasure that I spent part of my morning trolling Twitter to document other folk’s #HalloweenFail experiences. Here are my favorites:
(10) jencck: Kids are watching “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown!” Lucy’s a little b*tch. Snoopy needs to bite her in the ass. #Halloween #badmom
(9) happygoth:On a related note, “sexy” Spongebob Squarepants (Spongebabe) is an oxymoron. #halloween #costume #fail
(8) MerrickWatts: Kids like olives, don’t they? #trickortreat
(7) taniakohut : Strangest #trickortreat moment: 60-year-old woman alone who didn’t make eye contact. No costume- unless she’s reppin for crazy cat ladies
(6) jelani9: New rule: you can no longer #trickortreat when you have facial hair. Kid knocking on my door looks like Isaac Hayes.
(5) jelani9: Seriously, if you’re old enough to have razor bumps, it’s not #trickortreat, it’s panhandling.
(4) jimmyfallon : Went to party dressed as The Unabomber. My friend went as Ethan Hawke in “Before Sunrise.” No one knew who either of us were. #halloweenfail
(3) MumsnetTowers :”A sign saying, ‘Sacrifice volunteers, please ring bell’ normally does the trick. ”
(2) hausofblonde : It happened. Jim-jams have now been seen by a group of teenagers. I knew it. #trickortreat #fail
(1) ChickyMara: I personally feel that Crunchie bars and Crispy Crunch are inappropriate for children #halloween #badmommy