10 Ways New Year's Eve is Totally Different After You Have Kids

Photo Credit: Photostock

I was never a huge fan of  New Year’s Eve, so it doesn’t bother me that I’m missing out. For some people however, this is the biggest party night of the year. But unless you’re one of those lucky few with either a doting granny around the corner or a live-in nanny — going out on New Year’s Eve loses some of it’s luster after becoming a parent.

I remember how exciting it all was when I was younger, but now? Staying up too late just means paying for it extra hard the next morning. And it’s expensive. And it’s freezing out. And who wants to wear a tiny dress and then stand around outside? And isn’t your mother coming tomorrow?

I know. I’m practically a geezer. Maybe if I didn’t have three adorable howler monkeys to deal with, I’d have more energy for making New Year’s Eve a night to remember. It was really fun about ten years ago when I was still in my twenties, before I became an old fogey a mommy.

Here are ten ways the whole experience is different, before and after kids.

  • Making Plans for the Big Night 1 of 11
    Making Plans for the Big Night
    Before: So many parties, so little time.
    After: How the hell are we going to find a sitter on New Year's Eve?
    Photo Credit: Michel Marcol.
  • Picking the Right Outfit 2 of 11
    Picking the Right Outfit
    Before: I want to look sexy, but not slutty. You know what I mean?
    After: Can you see my Spanx? No? Good.
    Photo Credit: Ambro.
  • Getting Ready 3 of 11
    Getting Ready
    Before: Clear my schedule, I need a pedi and I should get my brows threaded.
    After: Three minute prison shower while the kids are watching Dora.
    Photo Credit: Stuart Miles.
  • Transportation 4 of 11
    Before: Limos are fun, but they're so expensive. Let's just take a cab.
    After: We're gonna look awesome rolling up to da club in the Odyssey.
    Photo Credit: Damian Brandon.
  • Dinner 5 of 11
    Before: Oysters and champagne? Or bar food? Something heavy to soak up the drinks later? What do you feel like?
    After: Four bites of mac and cheese that was left on your toddler's plate.
    Photo Credit: Simon Howden.
  • The Main Event 6 of 11
    The Main Event
    Before: WOO HOO! This DJ is bad ass!
    After: It's really loud in here, right?
    Photo Credit: photostock.
  • Midnight 7 of 11
    Before: I'll be smooching. (crossies!)
    After: I'll be sleeping. (crossies!)
    Photo Credit: photostock.
  • Getting Home 8 of 11
    Getting Home
    Before: I really don't remember how we got home.
    After: We couldn't find a sitter so we never left.
    Photo Credit: xedos4.
  • The Morning After 9 of 11
    The Morning After
    Before: Sleep til noon, then hair of the dog.
    After: Up at dawn, then walk the dog.
    Photo Credit: Suat Eman.
  • Resolutions 10 of 11
    Before: Next year, I'm going to be more responsible.
    After: Next year, I'm going to be more spontaneous.
    Photo Credit: Ambro.
  • More Before and After Kids Silliness 11 of 11
    More Before and After Kids Silliness

    You can check out more silly stuff that's different Before and After Kids right here!

Read more from Julie at her blog Rants from MommyLand. Follow Julie on Facebook and Twitter for additional goofy nonsense at no extra charge. You can catch up on her posts for Strollerderby, too – where she is often slightly less stupid.

Article Posted 4 years Ago
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