10 Ways To Be a Good Friend to a Single Momcarolyncastiglia
Everybody has a single mom friend. Married couples aren’t quite sure how to interact with her and single people don’t know what to do with her kid(s). Other single moms get her, but they’re busy trying to deal with their own lives.
You love your single mom friend, but you’re not sure exactly what to do for her or how to even ask. Here are 10 ideas about how you can be a good friend to the single mother in your life. Hint: embrace her situation and stop acting like she’s an alien!
Don’t ask about her kid unless you really want to know. 1 of 10If your friend has kids but you don't, you don't have to ask her about the kids unless you're really interested. If you connect on another level or around a specific interest, focus on that. 1) Moms don't want to feel like they're boring anyone by talking about their beloved children who they work so hard to raise and 2) moms want to talk about stuff besides their kids, too.
Take her kid out for an afternoon. 2 of 10Not so much because your single mom friend needs time to herself (tho she definitely does!), but because her child needs to know the adults in her life, and you will have fun, too! I promise. Children have a way of changing your perspective on things and being hilarious all the time.
When you go out, make it affordable for her. 3 of 10If you know she's paying for a babysitter, offer to buy her a drink or pay for her movie, especially if you're childless and have a little more cash flow than she does.
Have a sleepover exchange. 4 of 10She watches your kid one night, you watch hers, you both get time to yourself and your kids get to have fun together.
Call her. 5 of 10I know, no one uses the phone to talk anymore, but since single moms can often feel isolated, calling her to check in is a great way to let her know you haven't forgotten her. Yes, you will probably hear kid noises in the background and your call will get interrupted by several "please stop that"s and "no"s, but call her anyway. She needs to hear from you.
Make plans with her in advance. 6 of 10Unlike a single person with no kids or a married person, a single mom usually cannot drop everything to come to your really cool last minute event. Ask her to do something with you a week or two in advance so she can get a sitter and has time to think about getting the laundry done/shaving.
Set her up on a date! 7 of 10Why not? If you know a guy you think she'd like and you think he'd like her, yes, by all means, at least broach the subject. Dating is often the last thing on a single mother's mind, but that doesn't mean it's not important!
Meet her someplace that’s kid friendly. 8 of 10Want to have a quick chat or cup of coffee? Meet her at the playground so that her son will be distracted while you giggle about girl stuff.
Ask her if she needs help – and mean it. 9 of 10Being well-meaning is no good if you have no plans to follow through on your offer, but if you've got some time to spare, ask your single mom friend if she needs help with a project around the house, if you can take her to the store, whatever! Little things mean a lot.
Come over to her house. 10 of 10Because leaving the house can be difficult for single moms sometimes, stop by her house to say hi, have a beer, watch one show, whatever. Single moms are people, too.
All photos via iStock.
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