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20 Truly Bizarre, Odd & Wonderfully Weird Dolls & Toys From Etsy

A Crocheted Uterus!

Dear Etsy,

I love you. I can spend hours, yes hours, just clicking away on the seemingly endless supply of handmade goods, gifts and crafts.

Yes, I can buy a wonderfully proportioned diaper cake, a finger puppet of Dave Grohl or an entire wardrobe of dresses for my American Girl Doll and/or Blythe Doll.

But you know when I love you most? When you present me with the bizarre, the weird, and the truly odd. Those hand crafted items that are truly unique and unusual that are innocently mixed in with the examples of hand-dipped candles and bottle cap art. Yes, Etsy, you really do amuse me.  How much you may ask? Check out these twenty crazy things I found on your pages. Which one is the weirdest? Good question. You decide.

Love,

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  • Condom Machine for a Dollhouse 1 of 20
    Condom Machine for a Dollhouse
    What is your child's dollhouse missing? Oh, that's it. A condom machine!
    Get it from Etsy shop MiddlemumsMiniatures
  • Headless Marie Antoinette Doll 2 of 20
    Headless Marie Antoinette Doll
    Something is missing here ... hmm. Oh! It's the head! Yes, this doll was made without the noggin as a tribute to the beheading of the one and only Marie Antoinette. Not sure if this is appropriate for your average, everyday princess-loving little girl.
    Get it from IWillFlydestash
  • Beat-up Car 3 of 20
    Beat-up Car
    Don't give your child false hopes with a toy car in the form of a Porshe or Lamborghini. Be more realistic with this rusted 1984 Chevy Citation.
    Get it from Etsy shop classicwrecks
  • S & M Bed for Barbie! 4 of 20
    S & M Bed for Barbie!
    Barbie is apparently a wee bit kinky! Love that they took to time to dress up Barbie to sell the S & M bondage bed. I guess the ropes and chains are sold separately.
    Get it from Etsy shop mydungeongear
  • Whitney Houston Finger Puppet 5 of 20
    Whitney Houston Finger Puppet
    Too soon? Apparently not to this Etsy seller. Just days after her death, this crafter whipped up this Whitney Houston finger puppet.
    Get it from Etsy shop mullishmuse
  • Helena and Her Bird 6 of 20
    Helena and Her Bird
    Meet Helena. She has a bird. Now, first I should mention that this is a felted wool masterpiece. But where would one put Helena? Something about it - although beautiful - is oddly creepy.
    Get it from Etsy shop SycamoreMoonStudios
  • Crocheted Uterus 7 of 20
    Crocheted Uterus
    Are you in the market for a crocheted uterus? If so, you're in luck!
    Get it from Etsy shop AnOptimisticCynic
  • Syliva Plath Doll 8 of 20
    Syliva Plath Doll
    What little girl doesn't dream of playing with a Syliva Plath doll?
    Get it from Etsy shop UneekDollDesigns
  • Itsy Bitsy Elf Baby 9 of 20
    Itsy Bitsy Elf Baby
    Not only is this miniature baby very accurately executed, but if you take a close look at it's ears, you'll discover that it is actually an elf. How big is this hand sculpted doll? Just 2 ¼".
    Get it from Etsy shop BalooHallow
  • It’s a Hot Dog 10 of 20
    It's a Hot Dog
    In some cultures, eating dogs is not as shocking of an act as it is here. But when you see a cute pup in a bun and covered in mustard, well it's a bit jarring.
    Get it from Etsy shop NebulousFrog
  • X-Ray Technician Doll 11 of 20
    X-Ray Technician Doll
    Doesn't every kid want a radiologist doll?!? To be fair, this is actually more a figurine than a play doll and is meant to be a present for a professional in that field. But I just like the idea of little Mary Anne playing with a x-ray technician doll rather than a Bratz one.
    Available Here
  • Child Birthing Doll 12 of 20
    Child Birthing Doll
    This item is billed as a "made to order custom childbirthing" doll and is meant to be used in educational setting. And boy, is it detailed! "The womb is knitted wool. It is rounded in the shape of a laboring women's womb. The cord and placenta are realistic imitations of the real thing. They are felted wool with different colors to show the veins and arteries. The fetus is made from cotton interlock skin, carted wool stuffing and mohair wool hair."
    Get it from Etsy shop Fairywooldolls
  • Coffin Nails 13 of 20
    Coffin Nails
    You know what every doll house needs? Coffin nails.
    Get it from Etsy shop MidnightsDreams
  • Kanye West Finger Puppet 14 of 20
    Kanye West Finger Puppet
    Oh if only there was a Taylor Swift finger puppet for him to interrupt!
    Get it from Etsy shop mullishmuse
  • Knitted Dissected Frog 15 of 20
    Knitted Dissected Frog
    For those kids who really, really enjoyed the process in science class, here is a version you can hang on your wall for forever.
    Get it from Etsy shop aKNITomy
  • Zombie Doll 16 of 20
    Zombie Doll
    Let's say it's little Maggie's birthday. She's been talking about how much she likes zombies on Daddy's iPad. So someone has the idea to get her a zombie doll. This zombie doll. Yeah, I think her interest in zombies will go away pretty quick.
    Get it from Etsy shop UnCookedArt
  • Nosebleeders 17 of 20
    Nosebleeders
    The dolls really aren't that bad. They're a wee bit creepy with their dark eyes and stained dresses. But what takes it to weirdville are the nosebleeds. Odd, very odd.
    Get it from Etsy shop strangedolls
  • Tiniest Teddy Bear Like EVER 18 of 20
    Tiniest Teddy Bear Like EVER
    Okay, this teddy bear is tiny. Like uber tiny. Like super duper tiny. It is just 1/2 inch!
    Get it from Etsy shop suami
  • Jesus Sock Doll 19 of 20
    Jesus Sock Doll
    For those families with Christian leanings there is the Jesus Christ doll ... made from spare socks.
    Get it from Etsy shop raggyrat
  • Big Lebowski the Dude Paper Doll 20 of 20
    Big Lebowski the Dude Paper Doll
    Yes, the Dude in paper doll form. What little kid wouldn't love that?
    Get it from Etsy shop claudiavarosio

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