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25 Parenting Resolutions for 2013

Something about the change from December to January fills my heart with emotions — such anticipation and excitement! But at the same time, a part of me feels slightly anxious over the uncertainty that comes with the new year. I am one of those people who like to know what’s coming. And despite my desire to know and plan, 2012 has reminded me that you can prepare all you want, but in the end, things will happen that you weren’t prepared for. Things will challenge and test you in ways you wouldn’t imagine. But life, which is often a mixture of the bitter and the sweet, the good and the bad, will also make you realize sometimes the greatest joy can be found in the unexpected, in the moments in which you dared to deviate from your plan or opened yourselves up to new things — whether it be new goals, new dreams, or new experiences.

As I watched my children cuddling with their father beside the tree on Christmas morning, I couldn’t help but think what I wanted my life to look like in the upcoming year. For me the greatest gifts I have been given are the three of them. They are my world, and in December when I learned about the tragedy in Connecticut I felt like my world was rattled to its core. Something inside me changed. I am no longer the same mother and wife that I once was. My hope is that I am now an even better one.

In 2013, my goal is to spend more time enjoying the gifts that I have been blessed with while I have them.  I am making some resolutions and writing them on paper and in my heart. I will do my best to reach them while at the same time realizing that if I fall a little short, it’s okay. Come this time 2014, I want to look back and smile knowing that even though things didn’t go as planned all the time, I didn’t just “exist” in 2013; I lived and I loved. I dreamed and I did.

So what are my goals? Check out my list of the top 25 resolutions I’m making this year.

 

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  • Be Present 1 of 25
    Be Present
    "Yesterday's the past, tomorrow's the future, but today is a gift. That's why it's called the present." ~ Bil Keane

    Ever been someplace physically but in your mind you are someplace else? I have a predisposition to worry so much that I have allowed my worry to rob me from living in the moment. This year I want to get better at reminding myself not to miss out on enjoying the present because I am consumed with worrying about the future.
  • Get on the Ground 2 of 25
    Get on the Ground
    When my oldest daughter was little, I spent more time on the ground playing, laughing, and experiencing life from her level. Life is so much sweeter when you look at it from the viewpoint of your children. Sitting down and looking at them face to face allows you to take in all the beauty that is around you, seeing things the way they see them.
  • Eat Cake for Breakfast 3 of 25
    Eat Cake for Breakfast
    Sometimes you have to break the rules — especially the rules that aren't really rules. One day my daughter and I ate a cupcake for breakfast. She thought it was the silliest, most fun thing. Sometimes it's okay to do things a little differently. We shall have cake for breakfast again this year.
  • More Loving in the Morning 4 of 25
    More Loving in the Morning
    Our mornings tend to be so hurried that we don't take the time to show our loved ones much affection, with the exception of a rushed "I love you" or kiss. How much sweeter our mornings would be if we took some time to cuddle with our children and our spouses, if we said "I love you" more slowly and looked in the person's eyes as we told them? Our mornings set the tone for our day. I wonder how much better my child's mornings are when they are filled with smiles and hugs as opposed to those hurried ones that fill our everydays. If I plan better, surely there will be more time to change the way we structure our mornings.
  • Date My Husband 5 of 25
    Date My Husband
    When our relationship is good, our children benefit from that. Nothing makes our children happier or feel more secure than seeing their parents happy and loving one another. At the same time it is important to make an effort to strengthen and preserve the relationship between my spouse and me.
  • Cultivate My Passion 6 of 25
    Cultivate My Passion
    I have found my passion. I love writing, so now my goal is to find more ways to become a stronger writer, primarily by writing more, but also by putting myself out there and opening myself up to opportunities that I may have overlooked in the past due to my tendency to underestimate myself. I've found what it is that I love to do, outside of being a wife and a mother, and now it is time for me to work on becoming better at it.
  • Put the Phone Down 7 of 25
    Put the Phone Down
    I have become addicted to my phone. I am missing out on time with my family, the beautiful, amazing people that are here beside me. I am learning that there are times when I need to put the phone away. It doesn't need to be sitting next to me at the dinner table or in my hands while I am watching a movie with my daughter. Twitter and Instagram can wait. My babies can't — or at least they shouldn't have to.
  • Stop Obsessing Over the Details 8 of 25
    Stop Obsessing Over the Details
    Last month while shopping for a holiday party for my 8-year-old and her friends, I wasted time debating whether or not I should go to another store to get plates and napkins because all of the pretty ones were sold out. The next morning while texting my friend about my dilemma, it hit me that plates don't matter. Happy children do. Yes, details are nice, but in the end my child isn't going to be concerned over the fact that I didn't get the fancy plates or use glitter on the gingerbread garland. She's in it for the fun.
  • Let My Children See Me Cry 9 of 25
    Let My Children See Me Cry
    I always worry about my oldest daughter seeing me cry. She is sensitive, and I don't ever want her to worry about me, but the reality is that sometimes I get sad. Sometimes things — both happy and sad — move me to tears, and through my tears she can learn that it is okay to cry. Despite what some might say, crying doesn't make you weak or a baby. It makes you human. My tears can be an opportunity to teach my child a valuable lesson or help facilitate some great conversations between the two of us. Additionally, when she cries she will be reminded that for some of us, and for some situations, the most appropriate way to express what is felt is with tears.
  • Volunteer with My Child 10 of 25
    Volunteer with My Child
    My daughter has been involved in donating to various causes, whether it is her clothing and toys, Christmas gifts, food to the food pantry, or our recent endeavor, filling the cup for the World Food Program. But, she has yet to experience volunteering with me. I want my daughter to learn that she can make a valuable contribution to this world simply by caring enough to help and then actually helping. I want to further instill this desire to make the world better and then provide her with opportunities to do it. I also want to provide her with an example of such.
  • Send More “Thank You” Cards 11 of 25
    Send More "Thank You" Cards
    We say thank you often but sometimes a written note goes a long way. This was reiterated when my daughter and I took a moment to write a "thank you" letter to her school. Everyone was so grateful to know that we appreciated them and were grateful for the role they play in her life.
  • Tell Myself that I am Beautiful in Front of my Children 12 of 25
    Tell Myself that I am Beautiful in Front of my Children
    For my children, particularly my oldest, when they look at me they will see a reflection of who they are. I have worked to not be as hard on myself — particularly around my daughter — but avoiding putting myself down is only a part of it. My baby needs to hear me say I am beautiful, I love my brown skin and my thick thighs, I love my wrinkly stomach because it was once home for her and, later, her baby sister. And as hard as it is to find shoes sometimes, I love my size nine feet and my larger hands, hands that will always hold hers perfectly.
  • Take More Candid Photos with My Children 13 of 25
    Take More Candid Photos with My Children
    I am guilty of allowing the fact that I am self-conscious to prevent me from taking photos with my children. My husband teases me and says that I always have the same pose. Not every photo needs a do-over. My husband calls it the "natural" shot; you know, the one where my face is scrunched up and my eyes look kooky because I was in the middle of a sentence, the ones that I find so unflattering. These are photos that capture moments and tell a story about our lives, a story that wasn't filled with perfection but thankfully filled with love. So much love — and some kookiness too.
  • Practice Self-care 14 of 25
    Practice Self-care
    Taking time for me has turned out to be easier said than done. This year I want to get better at taking care of myself, whether it's going for a walk alone, skipping less meals, taking a nap, or getting a pedicure more regularly.
  • Take More Risks 15 of 25
    Take More Risks
    A lot of time we mothers want to go with the safe choice. We don't take risks because we fear the impact a poor outcome could have on our families, but it's okay to put ourselves out there sometimes. You never know what can come forth out of your willingness to try something new or different. Dream big and then have the courage to reach for your dream. I am doing more reaching this year.
  • Cook Something Different 16 of 25
    Cook Something Different
    Tacos and spaghetti do not have to make an appearance on our menu each week. I hate cooking, but I love sitting around the dinner table with my family laughing, talking, and eating a nutritious meal. I am going to challenge myself to cook things that I haven't cooked before.
  • Put Some Holes in the Wall 17 of 25
    Put Some Holes in the Wall
    I am notorious for taking photos or getting photos taken, and yet none of them ever make it onto the wall. This year I want to get more photos off of my hard drive and on public display in my house.
  • Learn Something New 18 of 25
    Learn Something New
    There are so many things that I want to learn to do this year like how to sew, decorate a cake, and use my camera in manual mode. Rather than saying to myself, "I wish I could____" or "I always wanted to learn how to ____," I am going to actually learn how.
  • Say Hello 19 of 25
    Say Hello
    In November 2012 I signed up for my very first blogging conference. It takes place in the spring and while I am excited, I am also extremely nervous. I hide behind my laptop because it feels safe. I don't have to worry about being the girl no one talks to. I confess that I went so far as to ask my mom and my husband to come with me, but I am working on becoming more brave. I am learning to put myself out there — at least a little bit. If people don't like me, life goes on. In the end I get to go home to a family that loves me. I am realizing that I lose nothing by saying hello. Instead it's the exact opposite; I might walk away with a friendship that I didn't have when I arrived. In 2013 I am saying hi more often in hopes that someone might just say hi back.
  • Dress Differently 20 of 25
    Dress Differently
    I tend to wear the same clothes and buy things from the same color palate. This year I am going to change it up from time to time, whether it's with a fun accessory or statement piece.
  • Go With the Flow 21 of 25
    Go With the Flow
    As I previously noted, sometimes things don't go as planned. Certain situations will require me to regroup, rethink, and move on.
  • Let Go 22 of 25
    Let Go
    All of the baggage that I hold onto is taking up an awfully large amount of room in my mind and my heart. I am learning to let go of some things so I can have more room for the things that really matter.
  • Get Silly 23 of 25
    Get Silly
    Back before I got all wrapped up in the responsibilities that come with being an adult, I spent more time being playful. I found joy in making the people I loved laugh, especially my little person. Seeing the faces of my children light up when I say or do something funny is one of those small things that makes a big difference. I believe that laughter is good for my soul, and I need to spend more time doing it.
  • Say What I Want 24 of 25
    Say What I Want
    I have got to stop expecting people to read my mind, particularly my husband. If I am expecting something, wanting something, or in need of something, I need to open my mouth and say it.
  • Be the Change 25 of 25
    Be the Change
    Ghandi was on to something; we must "be the change" we wish to see. If I want my loved ones to be kinder and listen more then I can make more of an effort to set an example for them.

 

What are some of your resolutions for 2013?

 

Photos Source: iStockphoto

Read more from Krishann on her personal blog His Mrs. Her Mr. Krishann is also a contributor for The Conversation and The Conscious Perspective. Follow her on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest.

More from Krishann on Mom:

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