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25 Things Stock Photography Taught Us About Love

shutterstock_70144996Bloggers spend an inordinate amount of time perusing stereotype stock photography. And while finding that perfect image to represent our message is hard, finding an image that doesn’t insult the intelligence of mankind can be even harder.

Like a caricature of real life, stock photography is best known for absurd, extreme, and epically cheesy situational poses designed to convey a very obvious message.

If you think love is complicated, fear not! Stock photography has got it all figured out. Check out the 25 things stock photos taught us about love after the jump!

Interpretive love gestures 1 of 25
Interpretive love gestures are just another way couples prove their love for each other. You should see how my husband and I interpret "Why do I have to do everything around here!" using only our middle fingers.

Image credit: Shutterstock
Glossy magazine sex 2 of 25
Look at us so hot and ready to have sexy sexy sexual sex. First, let's pose a while in this moody light and gaze in different directions.

Image credit: Shutterstock
Let's get it on everywhere 3 of 25
Honey, I know I can't feel my lower extremities but you look so hot in that Lands' End wool sweater that I simply must have you right now. Literally. In this pollution-emitting vehicle with snow chains. While I wear a striped turtleneck.

Image credit: Shutterstock
The double hand hold 4 of 25
Couples in double love hold double hands across the table don't cha know.

Image credit: Shutterstock
Meadow love 5 of 25
Young couples notoriously lie down in meadows wearing Ralph Lauren while bluebirds sing them a Coldplay melody.

Image credit: Shutterstock
Blame it on the sexy rain 6 of 25
Despite the weather forecast, she wore a tank top and denim mini skirt. All the better for getting caught in the sexy rain and engaging in public soft porn, my dear!

Image credit: Shutterstock
The New Mr. & Mrs We So Crazy in Love 7 of 25
Hipster love at its stock photography finest! These white Ray-Ban-wearing, Vespa-riding, balloon-holding newlyweds are out redefine modern love one kooky stunt at a time. Take that, Grandma!

Image credit: Shutterstock
Come on now, in the middle of the road? 8 of 25
Isn't this what newlyweds do? Get it on in the middle of the road, but not before saying "Cheese!" Cheese indeed.

Image credit: Shutterstock
Not the rolling pin! 9 of 25
Hubby's getting schooled by a pregnant rolling pin beating. Again.

Image credit: Shutterstock
Ribbons in the sky 10 of 25
What do you mean you don't perform light acrobatics in unison at sunset? Sucks to be you.

Image credit: Shutterstock
Titanic rip-off 11 of 25
"I'm flying!" she says with her feet planted firmly in the sand while a man stands behind her wearing a suit for some unknown reason.

Image credit: Shutterstock
Look at our new house 12 of 25
We're so happy to be in our brand new house sitting back-to-back relaxing with our freshly brewed coffee in matching mugs even though we have yet to unpack the coffee maker, mugs, or coffee.

Image credit: Shutterstock
Rubber ducky you're the one 13 of 25
Why wouldn't we wear our adorbs scuba gear in our bathtub built for two? Close your eyes, rubber duckies!

Image credit: Shutterstock
Women are scary 14 of 25
This husband is totally afraid of his 110 pound wife and her weapons of nag destruction.

Image credit: Shutterstock
He likes to play dress up 15 of 25
It's true, just check out this image. Not only is this straight man happy to be shopping, he's actually dressing his appreciative wife in a smart career separate. Fabulous!

Image credit: Shutterstock
He brings breakfast in bed 16 of 25
What do you mean your man doesn't bring you breakfast in bed with a little daisy vase? He must not love you.

Image credit: Shutterstock
What does she have that I don't? 17 of 25
A man comes home to find his wife making out with another woman. Hate when that happens.

Image credit: Shutterstock
Pity party animals 18 of 25
Duuuuuude, we like to party in the snow with big bloody gashes on our head because we're so freaking hardcore.

Image credit: Shutterstock
Boss lady 19 of 25
Stop your sniveling and take that box upstairs, you emasculated piece of man meat!

Image credit: Shutterstock
In the white room 20 of 25
No one discovers they're pregnant in their perfect white bed while wearing all white with their matching white-wearing partner. No one. Soon their bundle of joy will be barfing and pooping color into that sterile space.

Image credit: Shutterstock
Baby Daddy 21 of 25
Mr. Striped Sweater seems oblivious to the fact that his girlfriend is knocked up by some troublesome dude. Where's Maury?

Image credit: Shutterstock
Not creepy at all 22 of 25
Honey, let's compare bellies while I look super creepy and hold pink baby booties. (We can tell by the look in her eyes she's planning her escape.)

Image credit: Shutterstock
We argue over the contents of a piggy bank 23 of 25
How will we ever pay the mortgage of this gorgeous house with custom cabinetry with only $15.23 in your piggy bank? When you said you had savings, this wasn't what I was expecting.

Image credit: Shutterstock
We like robes 24 of 25
We like fluffy white robes...outside...as we snuggle robe against robe.

Image credit: Shutterstock
Once a cheater 25 of 25
Uh oh! Roller-haired apron-wearing housewife caught her man cheating because he was too lazy to wipe the perfect kiss marks off his face. Poor wifey had to bust out the boxing glove.

Image credit: Shutterstock

For the most amazing use of stock images ever (no really, ever), check out From Love to Bingo. Stock photography has never been so worthy of your time; trust us!

What are your thoughts on stock photography?

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More on Strollerderby:

15 Sweet Ways to Show Him Love

10 Reasons Gettin’ Busy is Good For Your Health

I Put “10 Ways to Perk Up Your Relationship” to the Test

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