Saturday morning, 6am.
Trix, Lucky Charms, or Cap’n Crunch?
These are the big decisions of one Monica Butler, age 9.
Sometimes she’d sail the milky cereal waters with the Cap’n but most of the time she was a Lucky Charms girl. It was the call of the marshmallows that always got to her. And damn if the Cap’n had more crunch than was generally comfortable on a human mouth … the roof of her mouth felt sore for hours after every session with the diminutive sailor.
Older brother Brandon? He was a Trix man for sure. But most of the time these kinds of decisions didn’t have to be made as there was generally only a giant plastic bag of generic Fruit Loops in the cabinet. Those Fruity-O’s weren’t fooling anyone. Add a splash of the powdered milk we had to resort to until the next batch of food stamps arrived and nobody was all that excited about breakfast time.
But, as soon as the morning line-up of cartoons kicked on, generic cereal and powdered milk were all but forgotten. By the power of Grayskull, those cartoons made everything better.
However, as I’ve recently discovered, Hollywood has come along and tried to ruin the naive purity of these gems from my childhood. The adorable Strawberry Shortcake is much sexier now. Smurfette will forever be linked with pop tart Katy Perry and, what with Tupac recently performing at Coachella 16 years after his death, holograms aren’t just the creation of Jerrica Benton and her futuristic holographic computer, Synergy, but a very real thing.
Oh well. Step back in time with me, won’t you, as we reminisce about a simpler era when cartoons didn’t sport cleavage and the scariest thing on the small screen was Gargamel plotting against the Smurfs or Dr. Claw maniacally laughing after growling: “I’ll get you Gadget. Next time!”
You can also find Monica on her personal blog, The Girl Who.
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