Many women would likely agree there’s a price to be paid for beauty. Then they wrestle on their first pair of Spanx and decide that if any friends really dislike them because of their back fat, they were never really friends in the first place.
Spank, push-up bras and other spandex-laden materials designed to pull us in and push us out in just the right places are great, unless your ultimate objective is to breathe or bend down. In which case they’re awful.
The thing is, they used to be way worse. Like a-southern-belle-from-another-century-who-needed-a-team-of-big-burly-men-to-sew-her-into-her-corset kind of worse.
Be happy you didn’t live in the 1940s and weren’t made to feel like you needed to wear one of these bras or corsets:
Mirror, mirror on the wall 1 of 13This angle really isn't the fairest one of all.
My fat is right here, you say? 2 of 13Thanks for pointing that out, because apparently she's the only woman on the planet who isn't acutely aware of the exact location of each of her flaws.
Pregnant or a few pounds overweight? 3 of 13What's the difference? This corset will silence anything that was once living inside you anyway.
Conehead 4 of 13Low lights, high beams.
Before and after 5 of 13More oxygen before. No oxygen after. But hey, at least you can't bend over anymore.
One up, one down 6 of 13Muuuuuuuch better.
A few inches off your waist 7 of 13A few cracked ribs. A crushed lung or two.
No matter; that's why God gave her a few of each.
It’ll cure that bulge 8 of 13That frown, on the other hand, will need way more than a corset.
T&A 9 of 13Teeth and abs. What did you think it meant?
Lose the bulge 10 of 13And maybe get a new hairstylist.
Back fat begone 11 of 13If only it were that easy.
Spirella Garment 12 of 13When you care enough to harness with the very breast.
One is right, one is wrong 13 of 13But neither is optimal if breathing is ultimately the goal.
All photos used with permission from Retronaut.co
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