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Country Wants to Ban "Gay" SpongeBob and Teletubby "Losers"

Who, ME?

Criminals and perverts.

That’s what a new study says children will turn into if they watch certain cartoons.

Poor SpongeBob. He’s soaking up a lot of negative talk lately.

First, came this report which said even just a few minutes of the spongey fella and his best starfish friend could affect the attention spans of little ones. Last week SpongeBob was on the list of cartoons that will keep your kids awake at night.

Now, the Ukraine is considering censoring several cartoons, including SpongeBob Squarepants and the Teletubbies, because a recent study labeled them a “real threat” to children.

As Yahoo reports, the Ukraine’s National Expert Commission for Protecting Public Morality released the report, which attacks several U.S. and international programs as detrimental to the country.

So, what exactly does “detrimental” mean?

The study quotes psychologist Irina Medvédeva as saying that children aged 3 to 5 years old, “pull faces and make jokes in front of adults they don’t know, laugh out loud and repeat nonsense phrases in a brazen manner,” after viewing the shows.

What? Children under five pulling faces, making jokes, repeating nonsense words and laughing? In front of adults they don’t even know, no less?

THE HORROR.

SpongeBob isn’t the only guy on the chopping block. The Ukrainian paper Ukraínskaya Pravda reported that Family Guy, Futurama, Pokemon, The Simpsons and Teletubbies all face censorship because, as the report says, they are “projects aimed at the destruction of the family, and the promotion of drugs and other vices.”

But wait! There’s more!

Some of the accusations leveled against the programming in the study:

  • SpongeBob Squarepants: “gay”
  • Teletubbies: “Deliberately aims to create subnormal (men), who spend all day in front of the television with their mouths open swallowing all types of information,” and promotes the “psychology of losers.”
  • Shrek: “containing sadism”
  • South Park: “reincarnation propaganda”
  • Japanese Anime: “A clear example of sexist propaganda”

As reported by Yahoo, the study concludes the cartoons are “a large-scale experiment on Ukrainian children” to “create criminals and perverts.”

Right? I mean, who wants SpongeBob hanging around gaying up the place? I, for one, always knew those no-good Teletubbies wouldn’t amount to much. And don’t get me started on that sadistic Shrek bastard.

Ukraine should stick to positive programming, like how awesome their government is all while painting any opposition opposition negatively. That will most definitely create a society of well-rounded individuals, don’t you think?

 

More From Monica on Strollerderby:

Dispatches From the Parent ‘Hood: Top Tweets ‘O’ The Week

Why I Hate Barbie: See Her Proportions On A Real Woman (Photo)

6 Questions Every Parent Should Ask Themselves

You can also find Monica on her personal blog, The Girl Who.

 

 

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