Giving my kids something new to aspire to is champion eater Tim Janus, who is now holds the crown for emitting the World’s Longest Burp. The World Burping Federation, which is apparently a thing, awarded the title to Mr. Janus after a single burp that lasted 18.1 seconds.
Prior to this particular dream coming true, Mr. Janus has broken world records for eating:
- Tiramisu: 4 pounds in 6 minutes in 2005
- Cannoli: 26 six-inch cannoli in 6 minutes in 2006
- Tamales: 71 in 10 minutes in 2007
- Burritos: 10.75 eighteen-ounce burritos (12.1 lb) in 12 minutes in 2007
- Ramen Noodles: 10.5 lbs of noodles, using chopsticks, in 8 minutes in 2007
- Fried Pork Rinds: 14.3 oz. in 6 minutes in 2008
- Nigiri Sushi: 141 pieces of sushi in 6 minutes in 2008
- Boneless Buffalo Wings: 7.719 lbs in 12 minutes in 2010
- Cupcakes: 42 cupcakes in 8 minutes in 2011, which I don’t think I could match even during my worst PMS.
Yeah, the pork rinds thing makes it all less disgusting, right?
Here’s Mr. Janus with the actual winning burp, and then discussing his “technique,” which involves downing an entire two-liter bottle of soda right before the contest.
Dare to dream, kids.
(Photo Credit: Wikimedia Commons)