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Father of the Year Pleads Guilty To Tattooing 3-Year-Old Son

Tattoo

The little boy said the tattoo did hurt a little bit

A man in Georgia who committed an “egregious” crime got off with nothing more than a fine and probation. His toddler son will have a tattoo by which to remember the experience.

Earlier this week a judge ruled that Eugene Ashley must pay $300 and stay out of trouble for a year after he gave his son a tattoo on his shoulder that read “DB,” which stands for “Daddy’s Boy” in 2009. Math isn’t my strong suit, but I think that would have made his son just a year old at the time.

It took a year after the fact for Ashley to get arrested for being a moron, and it was because an official from the Department of Child Services visited their house and noticed a baby with a tattoo. In Georgia, it’s against the law to give a tattoo to anyone under the age of 18. By my math (which, again, isn’t that good), that includes 1-year-olds.

Ashley wasn’t prosecuted for his abhorrent deed because the district attorney’s office said it would be too tricky to rely solely on the toddler’s testimony.

In his defense, Ashley said he was drunk and didn’t remember doing it. Thankfully the little boy now lives with his uncle, who said the boy recalls the tattoo hurting “a little bit.”

Do I need to say it again? Just because mostly everyone can before a parent doesn’t mean everyone should become a parent.

Anyone want to go in with me on starting a fund so the kid can eventually laser off the tattoo?

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