Is J. Crew Pushing the Gender Envelope By Showing a Boy With Toenails Painted Pink?
Does this look like the face of liberal, transgendered identity politics?
To some people (like me), it seems innocent — and even cute — enough: a photo of a mom and her young son laughing adorably as she paints his toenails hot pink.
The image appeared as part of a J. Crew ad campaign that was emailed last week to customers. The featured mom is J. Crew’s president and creative director, Jenna Lyons, the boy is her son, Beckett, and the shade of pink is called Essie. The point of the ad was to highlight a few of Lyons’ favorite products.
The picture’s caption reads, “Lucky for me I ended up with a boy whose favorite color is pink. Toenail painting is way more fun in neon.”
Cute, right?
To me — yes. But not to everyone, apparently. Particularly if you’re connected to the Fox News family, apparently.
“This is a dramatic example of the way that our culture is being encouraged to abandon all trappings of gender identity,” psychiatrist Dr. Keith Ablow wrote about the ad in a FoxNews.com Health column.
And a woman from the Media Research Center agrees, calling the ad, “blatant propaganda celebrating transgendered children.”
Come again?
The Media Research Center woman further argues that Beckett is being exploited as “the façade of liberal, transgendered identity politics,” and that Jenna’s indulgence in allowing Beckett to paint his toenails could “make life hard for [him] in the future.”
Say what?
It’s hard to know where to start. Is there anyone besides me who is genuinely shocked — shocked — when you realize that we’re not more evolved as a society that the sight of a boy of any age with painted toenails is made into a big deal by anyone? Whether Beckett is secure in his boyhood or if he has one too many female hormones, why shouldn’t his choice to paint his toes be as celebrated as much as it would be if he were a she?
What, exactly, is going to be hard for him later in life by this expression of cheerfulness with his mom? If it turns out he’s gay or transgendered or heterosexual, isn’t is fabulous to know in any possible scenario that he’s supported not only by his mom, but by a major corporation that celebrates what makes people happy, no matter their sexual or gender orientation? And why would anyone possibly think that painted toenails on a little boy are really a front for “transgendered identity politics?” I mean, how much free time do these people have on their hands?
P.S. – If Lyons and Beckett are, indeed, purposefully abandoning the trappings of gender identity, more power to them. What’s wrong with that, anyway? And if it turns out that Beckett is transgendered, give me a single reason why he shouldn’t be celebrated. Just one.
Do you think there’s something wrong with a mom letting her son paint his toenails pink — or any other color — in public or private?
My twin boys loooove pink. It’s because it’s so bright! And I’m sorry, but if they laughed at me painting their toes, I’d do it in a heartbeat. How can our society take an innocent thing and make it ugly? Why can’t it just be a picture of a mom and son having fun? Why does it have to represent anything other than that? Ugh. Stuff like this makes me want to crawl in a hole.
Forget the toenails, look at this boy’s hair. It’s too long! (JUST KIDDING!) What a bunch of tight-ass losers at FOX et al. All colors for all people and let folks do what makes them happy as long as they don’t hurt others!
The thing that always amazes me is that the people who say they are concerned because it will make things “difficult for the boy later” are the actual reason things could be “difficult for the boy later.” If there is nothing wrong with a girl with pink toenails there is nothing wrong with a boy with pink toenails. It hurts no one.
Ha! My son loves to paint his nails and toes! And by some mysterious process, he and his sisters have decided that black, blue, green and Justin Beiber purple sparkly hearts are for BOYS, while pink, grey, white and gold are for GIRLS. Red, yellow and orange are up for grabs.
Exceptions are made if you are wearing Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, Griffyndor or Slytherin house colours!
Whatever the gender politics of this, I wouldn’t pose with my kid for such a picture in such a “controversial” way. (And, seriously, it had to at least cross this woman’s mind that some people would think that it was weird, at the least. I’m sure she’s not a moron.) What about when this boy’s classmates inevitably make fun of him for “acting like a girl”? It looks to me like she thoughtlessly put her son in a situation that could be tough for him, just so she can prove how hip and cool she is. I let my sons dress up in princess clothes, but I wouldn’t publish photos of this so that *they* wouldn’t have to deal with the fallout of a topic that they don’t understand at all.
@Chilaura — If I had to take a guess, it would be that Beckett lives somewhere highly evolved in which a boy painting his toenails will not be ridiculed for it. I also think calling the ad “controversial” does nothing but feed into the notion that she’s doing something wrong by painting his toenails, and I don’t think she is.
@Chilaura: I would not have thought twice about taking that picture. In my community that’s not controversial and I am pretty shocked it would be anywhere.
My five year old son recently went to swimming lessons with painted nails. When one of the boys at swimming told him that “only girls wear nail polish” he calmly replied that “nail polish is for anyone who wants to wear it” and explained that it isn’t just for either sex. After the lesson he and I chatted about how anyone CAN wear it, but it is more common on girls. He decided not to take it off for school the next day, where the only comments he got were “cool nails” from some of the other kids, boys included.
@Meredith: Wow, your “highly evolved” couldn’t possibly be any more condescending, could it? And besides that, regardless of how “highly evolved” the parents are, I’m guessing that at least a few of their kids won’t be, whether it’s now or a few years down the road.
As far as the word “controversial” goes: I put it in quotation marks! Which indicates that I’m using that word in a somewhat different way than its strict sense. Obviously, some people have found the image to be controversial; not all will. As I said in my comment, I let my boys dress up in girl clothes; I’m not one of those “unevolved” people who is going to freak out over every possible incidence of gender line-crossing. My only real criticism is that she put her child out there in a public way in an ad that she had to know was going to get (or had a possibility of getting) some negative feedback. But maybe her kid should just suck it up on whatever negative feedback he receives, since his mom is so open-minded and progressive?
My sons love to wear toenail polish, especially my older son. We’ve had many, many people imply that he either is gay, or will become gay because of it. It truly is shocking that anyone would give voice to these ridiculous opinions. I used to try to converse about it intelligently, but it’s pointless because those people are usually homophobic freaks who value conformity and group acceptance more than many other qualities. I finally asked one of them how much pink toenail polish it would take for them to s**k d**k. Well, you can imagine the logic breakdown that brought on.
@Chilaura — I agree with a debate over whether her decision to put her child in such a high profile ad was appropriate, but only if the debate were the same whether her child were a girl. If it’s because he’s a boy and he’s wearing nail polish, I don’t find the argument any more productive than what was discussed at Fox News.
@Chilaura – are you planning on teaching your kid to bow to ALL peer pressure, or just idiots who think only girls wear nail polish? Cause that should make for some interesting teenage years.
No, she’s probably planning to shelter them in a homeschool environment.
Wow, if some people are going to bash this kid for wearing pink nail polish, we’re far worse off than I imagined. And if that’s the case, then I doubly applaud this mom and her son for being brave enough (brave enough! For a boy to wear nail polish in 21st century USA!! Good grief!) to take this picture. This isn’t “My Son is Gay,” it’s a boy in some pink nail polish. Who gives a crap??? Oh right, Fox news. I guess there wasn’t anything else to get their panties in a wad over that day. What a bunch of ridiculous stupid moronic idiots.
No, she’s probably planning to shelter them in a homeschool environment.
You clearly know very little about homeschooling. It’s a rare day my kids are not out and interacting with people. Because they are homeschooled, they get to interact, on a daily basis, with a wide variety of people from all walks of life. Yesterday, they dropped off garbage at the dump and metal at the recyling depot. We spent an hour at each place, and they got to operate an electromagnet. Today we are going to Home Depot to learn about how colors are combined to make all the different paint shades. An assistant manager will be available to help the kids pick out new paint colors for their playhouse. People are fabulous in this town and will take time to explain to kids how things work. Next week we are learning how to decorate cakes (private class for our homeschool group) and we are helping the historical Fort do a spring clean-up.
That’s one week! Yeah, I guess your’re right GP. Totally sheltered.
Alright, alright, I get it. My sister was homeschooled. I am familiar with it. It’s fine, but it does certainly have its limitations. The things you describe sound just fine and wonderful but don’t really address the issue of peer interaction that we were discussing. And, uhm, I don’t plan on homeschooling but could do things like that, too…
Oh brother! Both my boys enjoyed getting their toenails and fingernails painted as preschoolers. It’s got nothing to do with being transgender. What complete morons! How can anyone listen to a damn thing on Faux “News” with a straight face?
“I finally asked one of them how much pink toenail polish it would take for them to s**k d**k.” @LAM. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!
@Andrea, what you described also doesn’t address any actual academics, which is the part I find scary. I know tons of people who homeschool, but they follow well considered and chosen curriculums on a variety of topics. I shudder to think that people consider taking their kids to the dump and hardware store to be “homeschooling.” Yikes.
@GP, I’m sure ChiLaura’s kids will be sheltered at the local Catholic parochial school replete with ruler wielding nuns.
Linda, my five year old can BUILD you an electromagnet and describe every element on the periodic table using real world examples (except for the assumed elements, course). My nine year old is doing linear algebra and studying Grade 12 biology. And we have no curriculum. They choose their own. That’s unschooling, and it would seriously blow your mind to know what my kids choose to learn.
Dear god, can you women read?! I get it that my opinions are generally uncool, but your apparent lack of ability to read what I actually write makes me wonder if you’re stupid or intentionally obtuse. I’ll go with the latter.
I questioned the mother’s judgement in putting her underage son in an ad which some people were sure to find controversial. As for me, my kids are still young, but I’ve pretty much decided that hair color and nail polish wouldn’t be battles worth fighting, if they were to become an issue. Maybe it’s not my preference for my boys to make themselves up like girls, but I’d rather they wear nail polish than engage in a host of other behaviors.
@LAM: Your response was awesome, and sort of inspiring. Way to go.
@GP and Linda: Would you put your kids in Chicago Public Schools? Laughable. Public schools are well and good until you’re actually stuck with the really, really shitty ones. It’d be great if the local and federal gov’ts could actually provide me with real options here in Chicago, but they don’t. My options are: Shit public school; tuition we can’t afford for private; or homeschool. What would you do?
@Linda – Thankyouverymuch, I’ll be here all week.
@Andrea. Yeah…. BS. LOL. Unschooling is a complete crock.
@LAM, You are a total rock star! My son is 6 and loves when I paint his toes. He’s is as rough-and-tumble-dirt-and-bugs BOY as you can get. I also let him go to dinner or Target in jeans, a Jim Morrison tee, a Spider-Man mask, Batman cape, and a top hat if he wants. I want him to be his own person. I saw this story on Jenna and Beckett when it was originally sent via email by J Crew. I, like I would assume Jenna, didn’t give it so much as a thought. I just thought, ‘They’re so cute. I like that color… Should use my Chanel one like it on my next pedi.’, and moved right on. I don’t see why anyone would have a reaction any different. I’m a creative person with a creative job who lives a whimsical life… in Ohio. Do I know this kind of judgment exists, of course! But I have apparently successfully blocked other people’s ignorance out since it never even occurred to me that it would cause any controversy. I firmly believe people who sit back and judge people who are obviously happy do so because they’re miserable. I don’t hate Fox News, but I do think they love to appeal to the ugly and unhappy when they run out of interesting things. There’s plenty to report right now, getting bored people worked up about about interesting peoples’ stylish lives shouldn’t be one of them.
Seriously? I had no idea people could get upset about something so innocuous. How on earth do they summon any energy when something genuinely difficult or upsetting happens?
Its 20011. Who cares. My sister and I used to “make over” my brother (he was ten years younger) when he was a 3-6 year old kid, and he loved it because it was fun, he was being lavished with attention from his older sisters and he just liked pretty/bright things at that age. We also took many photos because it was just too precious no to. He is now almost 20, athletic, brilliant, and straight. We wouldn’t care if he was gay anyways, why is that even an issue. Too many kids lose their innocence and creativity by parents and adults who try to force upon them their own skewed ideals of how things should be.
The ONLY reason that this picture was published is that Jenna Lyons wants to show that’s she’s hip in order to move more product. The statement she’s making with that picture is “Look at me!!! Look at me!!! I’m sooooo open-minded!!!!”
Her son is merely a prop for her to gain street cred for J Crew with the liberal sect.
As a father I was annoyed when my wife wanted to paint my sons toes. The same way I would not want my young SON wearing a dress, or womens panties I would not want him carrying a purse or painting his nails. This is associated with being female period. I do not think it is healthy at this age to do that and confuse issues. No one cares about the color, nor do people care about what people do in their own homes in private. However this does appear to me to be intened to push a blatant agenda. Btw I VOTED for Obama support the right of a woman to choose and am for civil uniions and gays in the military.. so do not put me in a conservative box for disagreeing with those loudest here.
“And if it turns out that Beckett is transgendered, give me a single reason why he shouldn’t be celebrated. Just one.”
Ok, well here is one. If it turns out that he is transgendered, maybe Beckett should be the one to decide when he wanted to let it be known amongst his community and his friends that this is his lifestyle. Some would say that he deserves the right to make his own decisions about this, and not when he is five years old being used to make a political statement for his mother’s company.
@Phoodoo — Who, besides Fox News (and you), says that nail polish on a boy is a political statement? Sometimes painted toenails are just painted toenails.
painted toenails are just painted toenails, and they’re not healthy, as nail polish contains phtalates. Phtalates are known to be amongst endocrine disrupting chemicals, and they’re aspecially threatening to small children. Even a small, but consistent exposure to such chemicals causes hormonal imbalances in youngsters and adults, thus causing feminization of males. Interesting coincidence, huh? Worth mentioning. I would not use nail polish myself as it is highly toxic, let alone applying it to a child of mine, boy or girl it does not even matter.
I recall seeing that topic or something like that before. I was initially put off towards painting little boys nails or toenails, but when I looked at the picture of Beckett and his mom my thoughts were more on the lines of “That’s so cute!” Honestly I don’t have kids, (not of age yet), but I do have a six year old male cousin (more than actually). I, myself, I believe that kids are kids. They don’t know about every stereotype out there so why not let them experiment while they’re young? Why not let them have fun while they are unaware of the amount of gender based stereotypes floating in the world? My cousin knows what’s for boys and girls, but who says you can’t have a little fun? My brother and I played with, and shared, each other’s toys. He even wore one of my dresses when we played dress up at a young age. Now, he’s a hormone-fueled teenager and as straight as a boy can be. Not to mention he’s also been taken under the wing of the stereotypical society that we live in. Nail polish is nail polish. As long as the kid isn’t tasting it, no one should be making that big a deal about it.
I think it’s disgusting, and a gross disrespect of the boy’s manhood. She ought to have far more respect for her son’s body, than to exploit him like that for profit, and her own agenda.