Episode 3 of Charlie Sheen’s web show “Sheen’s Korner” just went live for a very brief and nonsensical 11 minutes. In the first minute of the show, Sheen dropped a handful of f-bombs. Sheen’s hair was a disaster, the bags under his eyes could suit him for a flight around the world – solo – and he was smoking like a fiend. He’s likely drinking booze, too, since I saw the top of a bottle that looked like the type that holds liquor. Sheen mimicked chugging at one point.
Thank God the custody hearing between Sheen and Mueller originally scheduled for tomorrow has been cancelled, because I’m not sure Sheen can put together a coherent sentence at this point.
During Episode 3, Sheen was on the phone with Bob Maron again, talking about being in the “middle of a movement.” His “winning” shtick already seems old, especially when it’s so obvious Sheen’s about to crash from his high. Sheen once again had trouble with his connection to Maron, leaving him “foiled by phones and trolls,” yet this time Maron seemed to want to distance himself from Sheen, mentioning more than once that he was trying to decipher Sheen’s isms like everyone else. I can’t help but think this would be brilliant if it was performance art, but Sheen’s meltdown is all too real. At one point he said, “I’m gonna reach out to the founder of Amazon to sell my book, Apocalypse Me: The Jaws of Life,” adding, “If you buy ten copies, I get one free. If you buy 11, you get them all. Everybody wins.” At least he still has a sense of humor?
Sheen did talk about marriage and family a bit, saying, “Marry a tree, because the other type of marriage didn’t work out for me, so I’m just gonna marry a tree.” (I think it might be best if you stay away from marriage altogether, Charlie.) Surprisingly, Sheen did not use his 11 minutes on air to talk about being fired from Two and a Half Men.
As the world watches Charlie Sheen meltdown publicly, his father, Martin Sheen, is not the only person out there who still desperately wants to help Charlie. Witches and warlocks in Salem, Massachusetts held a magical intervention on behalf of Sheen this week, saying that he summoned them with his use of the words warlock, goddesses and high priest. The Boston Globe reports, “The intervention involved a “healing circle,” which took place at Crow Haven Corner, a witchcraft store on Essex Street yesterday afternoon.” Owner Lorelei Stathopoulos told reporters, “You do a circle with love in your heart. He’s a wonderful actor… he should be helping the world.” Or at the very least, helping himself regain access to his children. When witches you don’t know are trying to heal you, you know you’re too far gone.