I’m pretty laid back, I’ve been told. My philosophy really is live and let live and I rarely get involved in anyone’s business. The last thing I want is to be told how to raise my kids so I do not presume that anyone would want to hear the same from me.
But there are some things I see on a daily basis that drive me out of my mind, and I really wish parents would stop doing them!
What are your top parenting pet peeves? Share them with us in the comment section below!
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Cold Babies
I cannot stand seeing babies in strollers when it’s 10 degrees out who have no gloves, hat or scarf on, yet are sitting stationary (and freezing), while mom is covered head to toe and running down the block, building up a sweat.
Danielle Sullivan writes for Babble Mom and Babble Pets. She is also a freelance parenting writer, authors a monthly health column for NY Parenting Media, and maintains a personal blog, Some Puppy To Love. Danielle lives in Brooklyn, New York, with her husband, three children and numerous pets.
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I agree with three points unconditionally, comments on the other two:
Out late- how do you know it’s not a special occasion? They may be coming home from a family member’s big event! Granted, MOST of them probably aren’t.. but imagining a decent reason might help you from getting frustrated.
Chastising infants: OK my baby is 5 weeks old, and while I’ve not yet resorted to chastising him, I’ve certainly found myself saying things like, “For the love of god please go to sleep…” and just this morning (by which I mean yesterday… I’ve not slept yet)
As I was saying, just this morning, my husband had to work very hard not to laugh as I shouted, “Ew, gross! Stop it!” For the record, the baby boy that was shooting poo on me and everything else in range didn’t seem bothered in the least by my yelling.
One more time (it’s my phone messing me up, not sleep deprivation. I think.)
Obviously its not OK to scream at a baby, or to pretend that he can actually control his actions, but hey, cut us some slack. We’re new at this, and don’t you remember how exhausting and overwhelming it is?
Yep! Agree with all of those. I can also add – being at a group with mums and babies/small children, where a mum is totally unaware of what their child is doing, and seems to be expecting every body else to keep an eye on them!
My toddler goes to bed at midnight and wakes up at 11:00 am like clockwork. He’s cheerful and always well-rested, as are we, and it works fine for us. I have to say that it never occurred to me that I was being judged for having him out at night, but hey. Whatever makes YOU feel better about YOUR parenting.
I know lots of toddlers who are naturally night owls. Their patents struggle with getting them to bed by midnight! I figure if you have one of those, why not go out at night with them? Those lucky parents. I am naturally a night owl, but my kid is the opposite. My morning lark and I are often out and about by 6am.
I find it hilarious that you open up your article with how amazingly laid-back you are and then you bring on the judging. Fess up and admit that you think all your decisions are the right ones; and everyone else is doing it wrong. Bring on the JUDGEY, ladies!! It’s what makes this the funniest site on the internet.
What about all the young school age kids (5 and up) whom I always see out at my Chicago supermarket at 10pm on school nights, with both parents? Sorry, yeah, I judge these people. Why can’t one parent ever stay home with the kids and put them to bed? Their kids must be exhausted at school and therefore can’t learn well, all so they could go food shopping.
Parents who refuse to make even the tiniest effort to comfort a crying baby. When I see women pushing screaming babies down the block, completely oblivious to their babies anguish, it makes my blood boil. I understand colic sucks, but that does not give you license to just ignore an uncontrollably sobbing infant. Absolutely not. Most of these women seem to be embracing the “let them scream until they pass out from exhaustion” school of not-parenting, and I seriously hate them for it. I cannot abide cruelty to an infant. That just makes you a bad person, as far as I’m concerned. Zero excuses are acceptable. Now there’s judgey. Top that one!
Biggest pet peeve: Parents who are looking at their iPhones and/or texting while their kids are playing on the playground/eating at a restaurant/talking to them/etc.
I keep my infant up late and let her sleep in late. Works for us with our family’s schedule. However when school begins for her things will change.
What I hate more than seeing understaffed babies are overdressed babies! I’ve seen so many newborns with sweaters and pants with a blanket this summer while it’s 90 degrees out! Overheating a baby is so dangerous.
So long as it’s not hypocrisy, & she’s not making the other people uncomfortable by confronting them in public (unless they are doing something obviously unsafe.illegal) what’s the harm in being judgmental? We’re wired that way, so we can choose what we’d not do. So long as we keep it under control.
I agree with hating to see cold babies-my Squidgelet was born in February, in Vermont, so I pretty much didn’t go outside, except to go straight to the car I made my husband heat up beforehand, for a good solid two months (can you say insane cabin fever)? Now, it’s summer in Portland Oregon, & he’s pretty much naked most of the time, & still turns up sweaty sometimes despite my best efforts! The fun never ends.
“So long as it’s not hypocrisy, & she’s not making the other people uncomfortable by confronting them in public (unless they are doing something obviously unsafe.illegal) what’s the harm in being judgmental?”
Yes, yes, yes!
I agree with most of the points except the out late. I hate seeing school-age children out late on a school night during the school year, but even that could be a non-issue if the kids are homeschooled, otherwise who cares unless the kid is asleep on their feet or something. It could be a special occasion like a birthday or a family wedding, or just a natural night owl kid who sleeps til noon. With the iPhone at the park, I am guilty of that, but my son is 8 and I am a pretty free-range parent. The only reason I even accompany him to the park anymore is because he has to cross a very busy street to get there, otherwise I’d just let him walk there alone with his friends. I did at his age. He already roms the neighborhood in a 2-3 block radius of our house quite successfully.
I remember an simpler time when we had a thing called paragraphs that we used to separate our thoughts. They weren’t flashy, but they got the job done, and when you used them to share your pet peeves, you didn’t create new ones in your readers.
This summer…Infants, especially newborns to 6 months at the public pool/sun while an older sib plays for hours. Also, screaming and whining children (elementary and pre-K age) at the pool throwing tantrums while their parent ignores them and they disrupt everyone else out of total frustration.
I don’t think it’s the going out in public that is the problem- its when your toddler is visablly tired or throwing a tantrum that is the problem! I was at WalMart one night and this young child, probably 3 or 4, was throwing the mother of all tantrums. Enough to where other people were looking at each other and not understanding why the mother was letting this go on. Screaming at the top of her lungs repeatedly for about 15 mins. Maybe that child should have been in bed instead of at WalMart at 10pm?
i agree on all. but i have taken my kids out late sumtimes. like to a bazar or if we are at a amusement park. when my youngest son was 8months and younger he was really cranky he had acid relfux and colic on top of that he had tortoclis i spelled it wrong sorry. So i would get frustrated with him. he would go to sleep by himself any kind of sound would wake him up or if he was awake he would scream. it would take me a hour at the most to get him to fall asleep. but i wouldnt yell at him. i have said 2 him come on already and what not though.
I agree with most of the points except the one on kids out late! I have few friends that have different work and life schedules than the average family. They work nights so the child is more on their schedule. As long as the child is getting enough sleep who cares what time of day they go to bed! I also agree don’t send you kid to school it they are sick but with two working parents and only so many sick and personal days if any its hard to do that! A child getting sick is not the worse thing in the world. In fact, battling germs actually does boost immune system health. You know the world would be less judgmentally if people would actually try to walk in the other persons shoes for once.
I have to be honest, I highly dislike the photo of the baby attached to this article with the beer can and cigarette! I consider myself to be a person with a good sense of humor, but the photo is simply NOT funny, and certainly NOT cute! I realize that the photo was choosen to emphasis a point that some of the choices that parents make for their children can be absurd. The photo, however, is still exploitation of a child. That, I can not support!
Is anybody else disturbed by the picture preceding the article, with the baby holding a beer can & an adult posing to light up the baby’s cigarette? Really???? And the caption says “I gotta admit this photo is pretty cute.” Whaaaat? Cute? Seriously? Disturbing and concerning on many levels.
Maybe instead of thinking the worst for all your scenarios you could instead give people the benefit of the doubt for why they’re acting like that. Thats what I do since I don’t personally know the person or their situation and thinking negatively about others has no benefit for me. Probably the only scenario I can agree with is the speeding around schools. No matter the rush putting others in danger is not cool. From a logical standpoint if the parent got in an accident they would really slow themselves down, completely counterproductive to wherever they’re rushing to. Everything else though I can rationalize possible outcomes where the parent is put in a situation that looks bad to an outsider that is unaware of the circumstances.
You missed our biggest one (I think) – people who smoke in cars with the windows up and their babies/children/pregnant spouses in the car with them. Like the PP, I can rationalize possible scenarios for most of the other things mentione where the parent looks bad but has a justifiable reason – except maybe the speeding/texting in a school zone – but seriously…I’m pretty sure everyone is aware by now *not* to expose children to smoke. And yet…
i agree with a lot of your statements. also i agree with the suggestion that people smoking in the car with children is just right stupid. as well i also agree that this picture, while yes trying to prove a point, is simply outrageous!
Some parents can’t help having the kids out late at night. As long as they’re understanding when they are cranky at midnight and don’t yell at them then you have no right to judge, things happen in the middle of the night that you can’t control. As far as kids being sick at school, they can only miss 9 unexcused days here, and I can’t afford to take all of them to the doctor every time they have a sniffle, they go to school or I go to jail. Or I could take them to the doctor every time and they don’t eat for the month. Judge that Ms. judgey Mcjudgey pants.
Wow, lot’s to think about. I admit I initially emphatically shook my head yes to everything in the article but I admit I have yelled at my babies out of frustration and I can see the point about the children out late. Did want to say something to Amber about her Walmart comment…I agree 105% with you. Wanted to tell you though that it doesn’t have to be late at night. I work at Walmart and it is amazing the number of children who scream, yell, cry, etc. ALL THE WAY through the store!!! Drives me crazy! I have started counting the number of tantrums per day to the point my coworker finds it amusing and agrees! Do children save it up till they come to Walmart? Do parents pinch their children as they walk through the doors? What?…lol!
Just off the top of my head, my biggest pet peeve when it comes to parents and their children is when parents swear at their kids or even in front of their kids. Awful!
I agree about the swearing too Michelle. One day I was at Walmart (of course) and this mom was growling “F**K you, you little B****H!!”. Could not believe she was using that kind of language out in public anyway and so loudly but then I turned around and realized she was talkiing to her toddler in the cart!!
I cannot stand when people judge others! Oh and when people wrap babies in blankets when it’s 100 degrees outside. Sure, cold and hot babies isn’t acceptable if it’s due to the caretaker’s negligence, but I was expecting to read something like “spanking” and not “being out too late.” Just the other night, I had to take my mom to the emergency room and by the time my husband got our son home and in bed, it was after 11PM. Granted, we didn’t yell at him to stay awake, or anything else, but just don’t be so quick to judge. It is just not nice (that’s what I tell my 4 year-old).
No one is perfect, and everyone is intitled to their own schedules, but honerstly, think ahead all you mothers! Late sleeping schedules and late wakings for your child will throw them off and it will be more of a hassle for you to control the rest of their day. Think about when they have to start school, how early they’ll need to be up, and when they get older. School will always start early no matter what age your child will be. And their learning abilities will be altered because of their lack of disapline and awareness throughout their day. Start early while you have control of it! Maybe parents can’t admit it, but they say “their child” has a late schedule when its really the parent being lazy and setting negative examples for their children and family. Women, we need to be good stewards and show maturity as adults when raising our children and be the positive examples as hard working women we were called to be. Sorry, I tell it like I see it. And I’m no better or worse than a hypocryte. I’m just surfacing a few issues we also have when we tend to point our fingers at other parents.
i understand that most ppl like to voice there opinion but i’m a mother o 3 with one on the way we live on a ranch in the country and i have had my kids out after 3 some mornings and on sundays we may not come in the house til 10 pm and i do make sure my kids have all they need and most of what they want my biggest pet pee is that ppl who judge others or the way they do things.
all children are diffrent ask any dr they will tell u some cry for no reason and are unconsolable how the parent handles it is not my business . it is those who act like they do no wrong that wrongs others
Some of you obviously don’t have children. If a single mother works night shifts and has to pick her child up from the sitter at midnight, how is that anything but amazing?? The parent who truly doesn’t care, is out at midnight withOUT them.
As for the being on a cell phone while the child is eating/playing/talking. ARE YOU SERIOUS?? So I am only ever supposed to check my cell phone after 9pm when my children are ASLEEP?? Because that is the absolute ONLY time of day when they are not doing at least two of those three things.
My pet peeve is bad grammar. Also, people who are obviously adults and can not spell. But most of all, people who speed down the highway, driving like maniacs with a baby in the car.
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I agree with three points unconditionally, comments on the other two:
Out late- how do you know it’s not a special occasion? They may be coming home from a family member’s big event! Granted, MOST of them probably aren’t.. but imagining a decent reason might help you from getting frustrated.
Chastising infants: OK my baby is 5 weeks old, and while I’ve not yet resorted to chastising him, I’ve certainly found myself saying things like, “For the love of god please go to sleep…” and just this morning (by which I mean yesterday… I’ve not slept yet)
Hit publish by accident.
As I was saying, just this morning, my husband had to work very hard not to laugh as I shouted, “Ew, gross! Stop it!” For the record, the baby boy that was shooting poo on me and everything else in range didn’t seem bothered in the least by my yelling.
One more time (it’s my phone messing me up, not sleep deprivation. I think.)
Obviously its not OK to scream at a baby, or to pretend that he can actually control his actions, but hey, cut us some slack. We’re new at this, and don’t you remember how exhausting and overwhelming it is?
I hate when babies have no socks on in cold weather!! Hats too!!
Yep! Agree with all of those. I can also add – being at a group with mums and babies/small children, where a mum is totally unaware of what their child is doing, and seems to be expecting every body else to keep an eye on them!
My toddler goes to bed at midnight and wakes up at 11:00 am like clockwork. He’s cheerful and always well-rested, as are we, and it works fine for us. I have to say that it never occurred to me that I was being judged for having him out at night, but hey. Whatever makes YOU feel better about YOUR parenting.
I know lots of toddlers who are naturally night owls. Their patents struggle with getting them to bed by midnight! I figure if you have one of those, why not go out at night with them? Those lucky parents. I am naturally a night owl, but my kid is the opposite. My morning lark and I are often out and about by 6am.
I find it hilarious that you open up your article with how amazingly laid-back you are and then you bring on the judging. Fess up and admit that you think all your decisions are the right ones; and everyone else is doing it wrong. Bring on the JUDGEY, ladies!! It’s what makes this the funniest site on the internet.
What about all the young school age kids (5 and up) whom I always see out at my Chicago supermarket at 10pm on school nights, with both parents? Sorry, yeah, I judge these people. Why can’t one parent ever stay home with the kids and put them to bed? Their kids must be exhausted at school and therefore can’t learn well, all so they could go food shopping.
Parents who refuse to make even the tiniest effort to comfort a crying baby. When I see women pushing screaming babies down the block, completely oblivious to their babies anguish, it makes my blood boil. I understand colic sucks, but that does not give you license to just ignore an uncontrollably sobbing infant. Absolutely not. Most of these women seem to be embracing the “let them scream until they pass out from exhaustion” school of not-parenting, and I seriously hate them for it. I cannot abide cruelty to an infant. That just makes you a bad person, as far as I’m concerned. Zero excuses are acceptable. Now there’s judgey. Top that one!
Biggest pet peeve: Parents who are looking at their iPhones and/or texting while their kids are playing on the playground/eating at a restaurant/talking to them/etc.
I keep my infant up late and let her sleep in late. Works for us with our family’s schedule. However when school begins for her things will change.
What I hate more than seeing understaffed babies are overdressed babies! I’ve seen so many newborns with sweaters and pants with a blanket this summer while it’s 90 degrees out! Overheating a baby is so dangerous.
No one can top you being a judgmental countess, Andrea.
Really? Wow! Thanks!
You haven’t a clue how welcome you are.
So long as it’s not hypocrisy, & she’s not making the other people uncomfortable by confronting them in public (unless they are doing something obviously unsafe.illegal) what’s the harm in being judgmental? We’re wired that way, so we can choose what we’d not do. So long as we keep it under control.
I agree with hating to see cold babies-my Squidgelet was born in February, in Vermont, so I pretty much didn’t go outside, except to go straight to the car I made my husband heat up beforehand, for a good solid two months (can you say insane cabin fever)? Now, it’s summer in Portland Oregon, & he’s pretty much naked most of the time, & still turns up sweaty sometimes despite my best efforts! The fun never ends.
“So long as it’s not hypocrisy, & she’s not making the other people uncomfortable by confronting them in public (unless they are doing something obviously unsafe.illegal) what’s the harm in being judgmental?”
Yes, yes, yes!
I agree with most of the points except the out late. I hate seeing school-age children out late on a school night during the school year, but even that could be a non-issue if the kids are homeschooled, otherwise who cares unless the kid is asleep on their feet or something. It could be a special occasion like a birthday or a family wedding, or just a natural night owl kid who sleeps til noon. With the iPhone at the park, I am guilty of that, but my son is 8 and I am a pretty free-range parent. The only reason I even accompany him to the park anymore is because he has to cross a very busy street to get there, otherwise I’d just let him walk there alone with his friends. I did at his age. He already roms the neighborhood in a 2-3 block radius of our house quite successfully.
I remember an simpler time when we had a thing called paragraphs that we used to separate our thoughts. They weren’t flashy, but they got the job done, and when you used them to share your pet peeves, you didn’t create new ones in your readers.
Seeing a preschooler with a pacifier.
This summer…Infants, especially newborns to 6 months at the public pool/sun while an older sib plays for hours. Also, screaming and whining children (elementary and pre-K age) at the pool throwing tantrums while their parent ignores them and they disrupt everyone else out of total frustration.
I don’t think it’s the going out in public that is the problem- its when your toddler is visablly tired or throwing a tantrum that is the problem! I was at WalMart one night and this young child, probably 3 or 4, was throwing the mother of all tantrums. Enough to where other people were looking at each other and not understanding why the mother was letting this go on. Screaming at the top of her lungs repeatedly for about 15 mins. Maybe that child should have been in bed instead of at WalMart at 10pm?
i agree on all. but i have taken my kids out late sumtimes. like to a bazar or if we are at a amusement park. when my youngest son was 8months and younger he was really cranky he had acid relfux and colic on top of that he had tortoclis i spelled it wrong sorry. So i would get frustrated with him. he would go to sleep by himself any kind of sound would wake him up or if he was awake he would scream. it would take me a hour at the most to get him to fall asleep. but i wouldnt yell at him. i have said 2 him come on already and what not though.
I agree with most of the points except the one on kids out late! I have few friends that have different work and life schedules than the average family. They work nights so the child is more on their schedule. As long as the child is getting enough sleep who cares what time of day they go to bed! I also agree don’t send you kid to school it they are sick but with two working parents and only so many sick and personal days if any its hard to do that! A child getting sick is not the worse thing in the world. In fact, battling germs actually does boost immune system health. You know the world would be less judgmentally if people would actually try to walk in the other persons shoes for once.
I have to be honest, I highly dislike the photo of the baby attached to this article with the beer can and cigarette! I consider myself to be a person with a good sense of humor, but the photo is simply NOT funny, and certainly NOT cute! I realize that the photo was choosen to emphasis a point that some of the choices that parents make for their children can be absurd. The photo, however, is still exploitation of a child. That, I can not support!
Is anybody else disturbed by the picture preceding the article, with the baby holding a beer can & an adult posing to light up the baby’s cigarette? Really???? And the caption says “I gotta admit this photo is pretty cute.” Whaaaat? Cute? Seriously? Disturbing and concerning on many levels.
Maybe instead of thinking the worst for all your scenarios you could instead give people the benefit of the doubt for why they’re acting like that. Thats what I do since I don’t personally know the person or their situation and thinking negatively about others has no benefit for me. Probably the only scenario I can agree with is the speeding around schools. No matter the rush putting others in danger is not cool. From a logical standpoint if the parent got in an accident they would really slow themselves down, completely counterproductive to wherever they’re rushing to. Everything else though I can rationalize possible outcomes where the parent is put in a situation that looks bad to an outsider that is unaware of the circumstances.
You missed our biggest one (I think) – people who smoke in cars with the windows up and their babies/children/pregnant spouses in the car with them. Like the PP, I can rationalize possible scenarios for most of the other things mentione where the parent looks bad but has a justifiable reason – except maybe the speeding/texting in a school zone – but seriously…I’m pretty sure everyone is aware by now *not* to expose children to smoke. And yet…
i agree with a lot of your statements. also i agree with the suggestion that people smoking in the car with children is just right stupid. as well i also agree that this picture, while yes trying to prove a point, is simply outrageous!
Some parents can’t help having the kids out late at night. As long as they’re understanding when they are cranky at midnight and don’t yell at them then you have no right to judge, things happen in the middle of the night that you can’t control. As far as kids being sick at school, they can only miss 9 unexcused days here, and I can’t afford to take all of them to the doctor every time they have a sniffle, they go to school or I go to jail. Or I could take them to the doctor every time and they don’t eat for the month. Judge that Ms. judgey Mcjudgey pants.
Wow, lot’s to think about. I admit I initially emphatically shook my head yes to everything in the article but I admit I have yelled at my babies out of frustration and I can see the point about the children out late. Did want to say something to Amber about her Walmart comment…I agree 105% with you. Wanted to tell you though that it doesn’t have to be late at night. I work at Walmart and it is amazing the number of children who scream, yell, cry, etc. ALL THE WAY through the store!!! Drives me crazy! I have started counting the number of tantrums per day to the point my coworker finds it amusing and agrees! Do children save it up till they come to Walmart? Do parents pinch their children as they walk through the doors? What?…lol!
Just off the top of my head, my biggest pet peeve when it comes to parents and their children is when parents swear at their kids or even in front of their kids. Awful!
Yes, and I agree with Anon…smoking with children near by or in the car is absolutely terrible.
Yes, one more thing. What is up with that picture? Does that baby actually have a cigarette in his mouth and is holding a beer? So not funny.
I agree about the swearing too Michelle. One day I was at Walmart (of course) and this mom was growling “F**K you, you little B****H!!”. Could not believe she was using that kind of language out in public anyway and so loudly but then I turned around and realized she was talkiing to her toddler in the cart!!
I cannot stand when people judge others! Oh and when people wrap babies in blankets when it’s 100 degrees outside. Sure, cold and hot babies isn’t acceptable if it’s due to the caretaker’s negligence, but I was expecting to read something like “spanking” and not “being out too late.” Just the other night, I had to take my mom to the emergency room and by the time my husband got our son home and in bed, it was after 11PM. Granted, we didn’t yell at him to stay awake, or anything else, but just don’t be so quick to judge. It is just not nice (that’s what I tell my 4 year-old).
No one is perfect, and everyone is intitled to their own schedules, but honerstly, think ahead all you mothers! Late sleeping schedules and late wakings for your child will throw them off and it will be more of a hassle for you to control the rest of their day. Think about when they have to start school, how early they’ll need to be up, and when they get older. School will always start early no matter what age your child will be. And their learning abilities will be altered because of their lack of disapline and awareness throughout their day. Start early while you have control of it! Maybe parents can’t admit it, but they say “their child” has a late schedule when its really the parent being lazy and setting negative examples for their children and family. Women, we need to be good stewards and show maturity as adults when raising our children and be the positive examples as hard working women we were called to be. Sorry, I tell it like I see it. And I’m no better or worse than a hypocryte. I’m just surfacing a few issues we also have when we tend to point our fingers at other parents.
i understand that most ppl like to voice there opinion but i’m a mother o 3 with one on the way we live on a ranch in the country and i have had my kids out after 3 some mornings and on sundays we may not come in the house til 10 pm and i do make sure my kids have all they need and most of what they want my biggest pet pee is that ppl who judge others or the way they do things.
all children are diffrent ask any dr they will tell u some cry for no reason and are unconsolable how the parent handles it is not my business . it is those who act like they do no wrong that wrongs others
Some of you obviously don’t have children. If a single mother works night shifts and has to pick her child up from the sitter at midnight, how is that anything but amazing?? The parent who truly doesn’t care, is out at midnight withOUT them.
As for the being on a cell phone while the child is eating/playing/talking. ARE YOU SERIOUS?? So I am only ever supposed to check my cell phone after 9pm when my children are ASLEEP?? Because that is the absolute ONLY time of day when they are not doing at least two of those three things.
Some of you people really are something.
My pet peeve is bad grammar. Also, people who are obviously adults and can not spell. But most of all, people who speed down the highway, driving like maniacs with a baby in the car.
A toddler with a pacifier is not causing any harm to anyone.
Spoken like a real mother who knows what having kids is all about, all families are different.