I’m not even sure why the Girl Scouts are even trying, at this point. I mean, why not just sit back and coast on the awesomeness that is Thin Mints or Samoas?
Yet the organization is trying to one-up itself with its latest cookie creation: Mango Crèmes with NutriFusion™
The tropical-inspired, Oreo-style, sandwich cookie has mango filling slathered on vanilla and coconut cookie shells and, in spite of its glorious cookie-ness, is touted as being chock full of vitamins hence the trademarked “Nutrifusion.”
Apparently Nutrifusion is the name of an ingredient in the cookie and the name of a company that, according to its website, created a “scientific process that…when added to foods and beverages, supercharges their nutritional value.”
To borrow a played out term from last year, “My favorite Girl Scout Cookie is the Mango Cremes With Nutrifusion™” SAID NOBODY EVER.
So yeah. They’re saying the new Mango Creme cookie is said to have nutritional value. Take the term with a grain of salt, believe me.
As Shine from Yahoo reports, William J.H. Grand, the head honcho over at Nutrifusion is specifying what it all means. “”The product has NO chemical process,” Grand tells Shine. “It is 100 percent natural and consists only of fruits and vegetables.” He also states that Nutrifusion, and its process of dehydrating and powdering fruits, doesn’t affect “taste or functionality of the products it goes into and is 100 percent natural.”
The company website states that “NutriFusion™ is not intended as a replacement for eating raw fruits and vegetables. Rather, we target processed foods with the aim of enhancing the nutritional profiles of foods that dominate the human diet.”
Anyone eating a cookie, even a nutri-infused cookie with the intention of replacing their fruit and veggie intake deserves a heart attack.
According to ABC Bakers, three mango cookies provide 15 percent of your Recommended Daily Intake (RDI) of Vitamin B1 and 5 percent RDI of Vitamins A, C, D, E, and B6. They also claim the cookies “have all the nutrient benefits of eating cranberries, pomegranates, oranges, grapes, and strawberries.”
Anybody see mango on that ingredient jamboree? Where’s the mango?
Seriously though. Let’s call a spade a spade. The cookie still has a truckload of saturated fats and is only slightly healthier than your usual go-to Girl Scout flavors. According to The Huffington Post “roughly three Mango Cremes are equivalent to two Tagalongs, based on saturated fat intake.”
I get that the Girl Scouts are trying to do something good but the whole thing reeks of PR bullsh!t. Nutrifusion, my ass. If I’m going to eat a cookie, I want a cookie. Don’t try to dress a cookie up in carrot clothing. You’re just giving a bunch of folks desperate for an excuse to inhale a cookies a reason to double their order. It’s a cookie. Let it be what it’s meant to be: unhealthy, sugary and fattening. And then we should all exercise some self-control and only eat two or three.
Or a whole sleeve in one sitting if it’s a box of Thin Mints. Because DUH.
They should award badges for most Thin Mints consumed in one sitting. Forget NutriFusion™. That’s the kind of PR I’m talking about.
You can also find Monica on her personal blog, The Girl Who.
Read more from Monica on Babble:
- They’re Baack: 25 Terrifying Characters from Your Childhood
- 15 Unintentionally Scary Characters For Children
- 5 Baby Name Trends Shaping Up For 2013
- 2012 In Photos: You Don’t Need A Pro or An Expensive Camera To Get Awesome Photos of Your Family