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Don’t be surprised when your homey calls you “buzzin” at 12 am on a Friday night and is confused about how sleepy you sound.
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-2/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-2
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-2/
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Don’t assume that same friend will be awake or coherent when you call back to chat during Saturday morning cartoons.
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-3/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-3
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-3/
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Do remember that even though you and your girlfriend might both discuss how to deal with nipple chaffing, she didn’t get hers from nursing a teething baby.
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-4/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-4
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-4/
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Don’t say, “You’ll get it when you have kids.” She might not have kids. She might not get it. You can fight about it later.
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-5/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-5
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-5/
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Do be wary if your 30-year-old bachelor friend offers to take your adorable toddler to your "Mommy and Baby" yoga class.
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-6/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-6
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-6/
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Don’t invite single friends over for a BBQ unless they really enjoy playing whiffleball and sipping from a keg filled with apple juice.
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-7/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-7
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-7/
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Don’t bring your kids to their BBQ unless you are ready to explain to your 5-year-old why he can’t have Jell-O shots.
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-8/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-8
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-8/
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Don’t pack your kid's favorite red juice when going to your friend’s house because it WILL end up being poured or spilled on their white carpet, white sofa, or white dog (true story).
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-9/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-9
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-9/
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Do pack your kid's food for the visit. Shockingly, most single grown-ups don’t have a freezer stocked with chicken nuggets and tater tots.
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-10/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-10
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-10/
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Do refrain from openly snorting when your friend explains how their non-existent kid will NEVER do blah blah blah (what your kid does).
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-11/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-11
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-11/
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Don’t look at them with envy when they recount all the places they’ve done the dirty in their apartment — including their walk in closet, kitchen counter, and the chair you are currently sitting on.
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-12/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-12
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-12/
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Do get out of the chair.
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-13/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-13
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-13/
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Do keep the laughter to a minimum when your friend tries to relate to your parenting woes by describing an interaction with her dog.
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-14/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-14
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-14/
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Don’t write detailed articles about your friends on popular parenting websites.
http://www.babble.com/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-15/
keeping-child-free-friends-childless-15
http://www.babble.com/mom/relationships/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/
/mom/keeping-child-free-friends-childless/keeping-child-free-friends-childless-15/
It’s worth noting that not all single and/or childless people are sex-crazed, irresponsible, alcoholic party animals who only throw parties with strippers and jello shots. Or that all parents leave the beer out of their parties in favor of kegs of apple juice and wiffle ball… This isn’t even stereotypical, it’s just dumb. I don’t know who your child free friends are, but they sound like they’re about 21 years old and have no concept of being a responsible adult (parent or otherwise). That may be part of your problem…
It bums me out that so many articles that pertain to “how to interact with your childless friends” imply that those friends are such immature people. It’s arrogant to assume that just because they are childless doesn’t mean they don’t want anything to do with children. Some of those childless people are couples who are quietly wishing and hoping and trying for a baby. Some have lifestyles that keep them too busy. Some simply cannot afford it. Some just aren’t interested in having children of their own-although they may love being ‘auntie’ or ‘uncle’ to your kiddos. This article makes it sound like the effort to maintain friendships after a major life-shift is one-sided. Both the friend who has children, as well as the one who does not need to consciously work together to continue a meaningful bond. I realize that this article was meant to be funny, but it just came across as mean-spirited.
Obviously there should be some sensitivity and awareness on both sides (childfree and parents) but if you were friends before either of you had kids, then there should be a bond there that transcends life’s changes. This article makes it all seem so black and white (childfree couples are alcoholic nymphomaniacs who have a distaste for children and parents are smugly condescending jerks). This is far from the truth. I’m sure the author wrote the list with tongue firmly in cheek but perhaps she needs to make that a bit more explicit.
Really? Baby yoga? Nipple chafing? Let me tell you all the places I did the dirty after we did jello shots at a BBQ? What was the intended purpose of this piece and who was supposed to read it? Who is served by taking a potentially intriguing idea, using stereotypes to create an us against them tension that barely exists, and then reaching (REALLY REACHING) for cutesy and funny, and failing? If you want thought provoking content about lifestyle choices and challenges relating to parents and the childfree, VISIT WHYNOKIDS.COM and “Why No Kids?” on Facebook.
Wow, I was wondering if I was the only parent for whom almost none of these things pertain and was feeling all guilty and weird about the fact that my life didn’t completely end after procreating (because apparently it should have). After reading the comments I feel better knowing that I’m not alone.
great article. thanks for writing!
what is up with all these lame list “articles” babble? is this what’s passing as parenting writing these days?
How completely inane. Who writes this shit?
Thanks everyone for your thought provoking and serious comments.
As a childless friend, I thought it was very funny and some were really true… my fav’s are #’s 4 & 9! P.S. I just ordered a white desk, lol!!!
Relax people, it was cute!
WOW! Firstly, we are all reading this same article on “Babble” correct? Or did I mistakenly check into the “Westboro Baptist Church” blog again. My point being that some of these harsh comments are extremely close-minded & are serving to remind me why I dislike most people. Truthfully, I find the comments more close-minded & “black-and-white” than the article itself. Take it from one of those “single (check), alcoholic (check), nymphomaniac (check) and proud of it pals. I believe that coming from the perspective of the person who wrote the piece, they realize these stereotypes do not apply to ALL who would be reading it. That being said…this article rings true for me. And shame on you for assuming that the author blindly thought this segment would tickle everyone pink and make them shit rainbows. I agree with your right to voice all of your opinions, but save your energy for something more worthwhile…like your kids. Get offline and off facebook because face it – your not single anymore and you’re not having nearly as much fun as ME! Good day sir.
Aug 18, 3:58 pm (by the way) is from Maria Snyder. Thats S-N-Y-D-E-R.
very funny , witty and creative !!
The article made me chuckle, but the comments are hysterical. Who goes on a parenting website and curses in the comments at the writer? I’m looking at you Lily…. talk about inane, your comment lacks substance AND any signs of intellect. Well, on the bright side..Ill never again take my sense of humor for granted.
You can still have childless friends! You just can’t barbecue together. Easy!
The only thing to really remember is:
When you and your friends catch up, don’t talk constantly about your children. Your childfree friends don’t care all that much. They want to know about YOU.
Some of this is funny but I cannot stand being painted as a stress-free, irresponsible, alcoholic, promiscuous, self-centered bitch with disposable cash and all this free time just because I have chosen to never have children. I have cut out numerous friends with kids because they have said AWFUL things to me about my childfree status.
Wow. People are taking this entirely too seriously. I got quite the chuckle out of this article and I know my childfree friends would too. They know they’re not nymphomaniac alcoholics, so why bother being offended by that. I adore my childfree friends (and sister). They give me the opportunity to go out and have grown up fun as well as show up to a toddlers b-day party because they are my FRIENDS.
Seriously? I’d like to say this is a cute article, but I can’t imagine the average age of the circle of friends involved is who inspired this! I’m 29, and as the only non-married, childless woman in my circle of friends, I have to admit that I haven’t met any of these criteria since I was 21. Though I will admit to occasionally thinking my dog has more than prepped me for some of the craziness of parenting. Pretty sure a 65lb dog experiences worse explosive diarrhea worse than any infant or toddler. Just saying.
seriously? what an article…..but this one is much better and a great read…read more http://is.gd/Yo5fib
This was hilarious! Lighten up people, not everything has to be serious. And the chair thing really cracked me up