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Should This Student's Haircut Lead to Suspension?

It's all this guy's fault what with his fancy skillz on the hardwood.

Here we go. Another example of school officials losing their damn minds over nothing and sending down harsh punishment because they’re just “following policy”.

It happens all the time. The kid who told a friend he thought his teacher was cute was promptly suspended for inappropriate behavior. Or hey! Remember the girl who may have saved her friend’s life by loaning her an inhaler during a bad asthma attack and was then expelled? Oh! Oh! And the kindergartner who was cuffed and taken to the cop shop after a tantrum in the principal’s office? That was a really excellent example of school and police officials hard at work following policy.

Enter middle school student Patrick Gonzalez. As reported on Yahoo Sports, the Woodlake Hills Middle School student is such a fan of Spurs star Matt Bonner’s basketball playing that he decided to shave a picture of the player in his hair cut. But the haircut, while completely innocuous, could land the boy in suspension.

Here’s a photo of the haircut causing all the commotion:

The horror!

Gonzalez faces an in-school suspension today if he doesn’t figure out how to alter the image, which, I guess means shave his head bald? Is that preferable for the school officials who are forcing Gonzalez to change his cut? In -school suspension? Which is, as we all know, totally the worst because you can’t go home and watch TV.

Apparently, yes. Because the image is so distracting it could incite riots and whatnot. As school official Aubrey Chancellor says students can’t wear anything that people support. So, like, a shirt that says PEACE or I Love the President of the United States is out? Supporting the president is bad?

Because he’s so funny I’m going to reprint Kelly Dwyer’s (from Yahoo) response to the whole thing below:

You hear that, Texas schoolchildren? Whether you support spurs or cowboys or even Spurs or Cowboys (two teams that obviously play against each other several times a year for the World Finals of Stanley Bowls), shaving a rather benign image of a fan friendly forward that wears New Balance sneakers during pro basketball games seems like the least offensive infraction we can possibly imagine.

Especially when the hero in question was an Academic All-American at college, one who “never received less than an ‘A’ as final grade in any class throughout his academic career, until he received a ‘C’ on a chemistry exam in college, which led to a final grade of a ‘B.’”

(No word on if Bonner’s ‘C’ and ‘B’ marks were unduly influenced by a classmate featuring an image of Sam Perkins shaved into his head.)

We don’t know the entirety of this story, or Gonzalez’s history. Perhaps he was caught selling three-pointers in the parking lot outside of the school last month. Maybe he was previously suspended for telling a teacher to “square your feet” and “get your elbow under the chalk” as she attempted to teach her class. It’s possible that he served a detention earlier in the year for drawing a three-point arc on the inside of a textbook.

What do you think? Is the response to the haircut a ridiculous overreaction or something that has to be done?

Image: Twitter.com/@Grace__White

You can also find Monica on her personal blog, The Girl Who.

Read more from Monica on Strollerderby:

GET OFF ME: Study Reveals Top 10 Things Couples Argue About in the Bedroom

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One Million Mom Homophobes at it Again, Outraged Over Ad Featuring Lesbians

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