It’s Time To Stop Calling Us “Mommy Bloggers”
That’s it. Enough.
As tired as I am of the topic of who mom bloggers are and what they should be called, after hearing the disrespect drip from the voice of a male technical journalist during a podcast today, I think the time has come for us to lose the term “mommy blogger” and instead use “mom blogger”.
Despite the fact that it was a few mom bloggers who coined the phrase and that many others followed by naming and branding their blogs as “mommy blogs”, the term is now too often used to condescendingly categorize all moms who blog.
I believe we need to put a stop to the use of the term “mommy blogger” and encourage people to instead use “mom blogger” and to only use it when accurate.
That means a woman who is a mother, who blogs predominately about being a mother can be called a mom blogger.
Conversely, a woman who is a mother and blogs about photography, design, technology, cooking or anything besides mothering is NOT a mom blogger – and I don’t care how many babies she’s pushed out. Those babies do NOT define her any more than the sperm that spawned his offspring defines President Obama as a “daddy politician”.
As Catherine pointed out that the term mompreneur is valuable to describe “a business that is rooted in her experience of motherhood, such that the ‘mom’ angle is absolutely relevant and even central to the business and its marketing”, the classification of “mom blogger” is useful when the blogger is writing about motherhood.
For years, Janice and I have politely suggested that the term “mom blogger” is more respectful and appropriate than “mommy blogger”, but now I’m shouting it.
The genre of mom blogging has proven it’s power and those who want to dismiss it as unimportant and less worthy than other forms of blogging need to open their minds and recognize that they are making uninformed, disrespectful judgments.
I do not want to hear men or women, journalists or otherwise, categorize an entire industry of women who are using technology to share their stories, opinions and knowledge as inferior “mommy bloggers”.
Yes, some women blog about the joys and challenges of parenting young children. Yes, some of them refer to themselves as “mommies”. Some of them even use the term “mommy” in the names of their blogs.
But the term “mommy” — unless it is used by small children or by mothers to refer to themselves in relation to their own children — usually drips disrespect.
Sure in past, Janice and I have used the term “mommy blog” and we have optimized for it and we had never been personally offended by it, but now we’re wondering if it is possible for us all collectively to rebrand the genre.
Could we as a community try to help retire the term “mommy blog”? When referring to the category of blogs written by moms and that are about being a mom, call them “mom blogs”.
Please leave a comment and tell us…
- Do you personally feel offended by the term “mommy blog”? Do you refer to yourself as a “mom blogger”, “mommy blogger”, “professional blogger” or some other classification of bloggers such as “design blogger”?
- Do you think some people use the term “mommy blog” in a disrespectful way and have you personally experienced – either reading or hearing – someone using the classification negatively?
Completely agree! I hate being invited somewhere because I am, as they say, a “mommy blogger”, which technically I’m not. That’s why I named my club the Mom Bloggers Club. Wouldn’t it be completely different if it was the Mommy Bloggers Club. Yipes!
I am not a blogger, but I am a mother. I don’t think there is anything disrespectful, inferior or unimportant about the term “mommy”. I also don’t think changing it to “mom” will make any difference to the people who have negative opinions about the genre.
It’s much easier to say “mommy blogger” than it is to say (or read in your head) “mom blog” because the m and b consonants are too similar in sound to be so close to each other. The words roll off the tongue easier if you have a y in between the last m of “mom” and the b of “blog.”
Personally, I prefer mom blogger but it’s not a big deal to me one way or the other overall.
It IS a big deal is when I HEAR someone say or use the term “mommy blogger” in a condescending tone…as if moms lost everything that made them intelligent human beings in the delivery room. (I can “assume the best” in the written word, but I pick up voice intonations very clearly.)
“Alright, mommy bloggers. Let’s gather up…” (basically, so that I can tell you what I want you to write about on your blogs…) annoyed me to no end at a recent NYC event. It had the opposite of its desired effect, because I will never use or recommend the product. (You had to be there. The words alone were harmless. It was the combination of the tone, the look and the gestures that made me wander if the speaker thought that she was dealing with some school girls!)
Oops…that should be “that made me wonder” (not wander)…
I refer to myself as a mommy blogger and I fine if other people do too. Why? Because I’m a “mommy” and all that it entails from parenting little ones to cooking, cleaning, managing the household, etc.
The other day my 4 year old daughter called me “mom” and I almost cried. I’m not ready to go from mommy to just mom.
That said, I’m working on getting myself out of the “mommy blog” world entirely and embracing the “foodie blogger” side of me.
@Jennifer James, Yes I am so glad you named your group Mom Bloggers Club!
@Grace, Thank you for sharing your opinion. And I understand that the change to “Mom” may not make a difference to those who have a negative view of the genre, but I think at least it doesn’t give them that extra edge of disrespect when they say, “momMEEE bloggers”… sometimes just the sound that people put on those two letters “my” drive me crazy.
@MLE, I suppose the other does roll off the tongue better, but I don’t think of it that way because it irritates me if I try to say it. LOL
@Kimberly, Oh yes, it is ALL about the tone!!!
@Cat, Oh I am definitely NOT ready for my girls to change from calling me Mommy to Mom… that will break my heart. But they are really the only people I need calling me Mommy. LOL
Thanks Ladies!
~ Susan (5 Minutes for Mom)
Im gonna have to agree with Grace’s comment above. It doesn’t matter what term you use to describe yourself. If the word blogger is in there instead of journalist then you better be prepared for some people to treat you as “less than” in the media world. And by ‘some’ people I am referring to people like the man you heard on the radio. I hate to say it but there is a certain amount of bloggers (mom, food, design, etc.) out there that act as if every brand should bow down at their feet to get to their readers. It’s those groups of women that have caused the sneers and eye rolls when you use the term mommy blogger. If you’re trying to change perception then maybe we need to change the conversation from termanology to how we handle ourselves professionally. Cause when it’s all said and done we can only change ourselves in the end and hope that others follow suit.
Kate
RetroModernMom.com
If you’re talking about the word being used to lump all moms who blog into one group for the sake of criticism, then I’m not sure I see the difference between using the word “mommy” or “mom”. Same thing. Also, why can’t we all be called what we *ourselves* want to be called? What if a woman wants to embrace the term? And finally, groups of people in the past have had a lot more success with overcoming prejudice by taking ownership of the term, or “taking it back” and using it to their own advantage. Blogger, mom blogger, mommy blogger, just own it.
I agree. Mommy blogger has been branded as condescending from those outside of the community. But re-branding? Good luck. How long have feminists being trying to re-band?
I personally do not see much of a difference between Mom and Mommy. If you are going to push to rebrand then I think you need to steer away from the “Mom” all together. I blog about my child, my marriage and my faith but I define myself as a Christian Blogger and not a mommy blogger because I have been gearing my blogs around my personal faith lessons of the time. If people call me a Mommy Blogger I will not be offended. They can call me whatever they like. I do not get paid to blog. I do it because I enjoy it. If people do not like what I write then they can just not read it. And if they simply do not want to read it because I am a mom then it seems like they have mommy issues of their own that they need to work out and it is not my problem. But that is just my two cents
When I’m discussing blogging in a professional capability–which I do for my job–I use the term “parenting blogger” or “parenting author.” It may be considered overkill, but it certainly delivers more respect (and with that, money) for the writer.
I could easily let myself be defined by labels. However, I don’t and you should not either. I blog, and I am a mom. I have a business blog and a personal blog. I could care less if someone called me a mommy blogger even while dripping venomous, vitriolic, ignorant comments. I do not give them the power to affect my mood or my day. I am proud to blog, to share the gifts that I have been given with others, to be the best me that I can be. Be blessed and be at peace.
Do not give your power as a positive writer and force in the blog community to some eeejit, high minded, fool as they say back home. It just isn’t pretty.
I define myself as a craft blogger mainly. The blogs you define as mom blogs I refer to as parenting blogs (are they any less relevant to a dad?). I agree that the term mommy blogger can be used condescendingly as well as the term mommy, and I refer to myself as a mum rather than a mummy (sorry I have to revert to Aussie), except in direct relation to my kids.
I do not like the term “mommy blogger”, not at all. I’ve heard it used disrespectfully, but more than that, it irks me that we slap a cutesy term in front of everything a woman does. My kids don’t even call me “mommy”, for Pete’s sake. I don’t want other people to call me mommy!
I personally prefer the term “parent blogger”. It’s gender neutral, it’s descriptive and it feels a whole lot more respectful to me. That’s what I’ve chosen to call myself.
FINALLY! I’ve always been uncomfortable when the word “mommy” is thrown around unless it comes from the mouth of a small child or a mother referring to her relationship with her children. I definitely like the sound of “mom blogger” much better.
Go Paige…Go Paige…
I go with Texas Blogger. I can’t be put in a square peg! I’ve tried, I’m too round. rofl… The term doesn’t bother me but the difference it makes in my mind…Mommy = mother of little ones and Mom = your kids are in the 1st grade now and are too cool to call you Mommy, Mom is much cooler.
Well, considering the name of my blog, I am obviously fine with the term. I agree that the term “blogger” is used more condescendingly than “Mommy blogger”.
Instead of fighting for a more grown-up sounding version of Mother, why not embrace the term instead? My children DO call me Mommy and I AM a blogger and I DO write about THEM. Shockingly enough, I think that makes me a mommy blogger. I may morph into something else as they grow older and my blog becomes less about them, but that’s in the future when I have more time. (am now laughing maniacally at the thought of “more time” HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!)
http://tracey-justanothermommyblog.blogspot.com/
I am not a fan of “mommy blogger” and I honestly just prefer “blogger.” Plain and simple. I’m a mom, I’m a blogger, but I blog about a lot more than being a mom, so I don’t think I need to be defined as a mommy blogger.
Personally, it doesn’t bother me to be referred to as a mommy blogger….as long as people acknowledge that I’m MORE than that. That I’m more than a mom. I would prefer to be called a “writer” over a blogger, because even though I don’t have anything in print, that’s what I am. If we’re getting into the terminology debate, I think that the word “blogger” stems an entirely different realm of criticism from skeptics. In their opinion anyone can be a blogger…when in reality they don’t know how much work goes into the content and creativity of our sites.
Can I just be called Blogger? I’m comparatively new to the blog world, but on my site I write about parenting, mom stuff, my kid, my dog, recipes, running, health & fitness and even throw in some jokes or random lists or a movie review that resonates with my readers. However, I understand the need to be categorized so that a blogger’s target audience can find them because let’s face it, there are a LOT of blogs out there.
That said, the only thing that I find offensive in connection with the term ‘mommy blogger’ is when you visit a site describing itself as a mommy blog (or mom blog, for that matter) and find nothing but button after button asking you to click and buy. No actual written words. /facepalm
In my opinion that just makes all bloggers look bad.
Tracy
scribblesaurus.blogspot.com
It doesn’t matter to me the title.
I’ve used the term mommy blogger. Who cares what a podcaster says they can only make a mom /mommy blogger feel belittled if we let them.
My daughter is just 9 months old ( almost in a week) She can’t talk obviously but when she does if she calls me mommy I will not correct her I’ll just smile and say “Yes baby?”
To each their own but like I said who gives a rats hoo ha about some male Pod caster? If the best thing he can do with his podcast is cut down women, that says alot about him.
And frankly his opinion doesn’t really mean anything to me.