On the night before my wedding I sat down to write my vows. The words seemingly poured from my heart and onto the computer screen as I stroked the keys stopping momentarily to wipe my tears. My words were honest and true and symbolic of the promise I was going to make to the man I believed I was destined to grow old with.
When times get tough I often take a moment to remember my vows, occasionally revisiting them and reliving the feeling I felt the day I tightly gripped a folded piece of paper in my hands, straining to see the words through my eyes foggy with (happy) tears. They remind me why I made the decision to make a commitment to my husband. Just days shy of seven years since the day when I first laid eyes on him, two years since I said I do, and I still mean every word. I know two years isn’t a long time to be married but I don’t take my vows lightly. Even so, I admit that some days I have to look a little harder so that I can see past challenges, imperfections (both mine and his), and frustrations and see my husband for who he is, the kind loving man I entrusted with my heart and the heart of my child.
In a poll conducted by 60 Minutes/Vanity Fair men and women were asked about their vows, their answers revealing which parts in particular were harder to keep. Your reality the day you say “I do” may be very different from your reality months or even years after you venture down the aisle to wedded bliss. According to the poll, for us women the hardest part to keep is that part that says “for better or for worse.” There is a saying that goes something along the lines of “If you can’t love me at my worst you don’t deserve me at my best” and yet for many women loving their spouse and sticking by their spouse through the worst part doesn’t seem to come all that easy. As for men, while “for better or for worse” wasn’t the hardest vow for them to keep, it did rank second.
So what is it that makes it so hard for people to want to weather life’s storms with their significant other? Nowadays it is easy to leave, to give up, and move on. While for some of us divorce isn’t an option and we fight and make it work knowing that sometimes life serves us a serving of “worse” from time to time but we hold on because eventually, hopefully, somehow the better will come. I imagine many of us have had moments when we questioned our choices in life, including our relationships, but then we remember that people are human and we find it in us to be thankful our thorns have roses.
So tell me, why do you think “for better or worse” is such a difficult vow to keep? Find out the number one vow men have a hard time keeping as well as additional poll responses over at The Huffington Post.
Photo Source: iStockphoto
Read more from Krishann on her personal blog His Mrs. Her Mr. Krishann is also a contributor for The Conversation and The Conscious Perspective. Follow her on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest.
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