My older daughter is turning 4 next week and we’re in the throes of solving the complicated puzzle that is figuring out a birthday gift she will enjoy thoroughly while simultaneously not making a hazardous garbage dump out of our house.
Kids’ toys can be messy, loud and irritating. But at least they’re not as painful and downright dangerous as they were in the ’50s and ’60s.
I’m quite thankful for my privileged parent problems circa 2012 (i.e. Should we get her the toy kitchen with the sleek stainless steel appliances or the chic retro kitchen that doesn’t include the fake microwave) and not the real-life problems of parents from more than half a century ago who were battling things like chronic back injuries and nuclear emissions as a result of their kids’ toys.
Here are just a few of the toys that I’m grateful aren’t in stores today (probably because the employees of the stores that carried them were parents, and those parents were killed as a result of these toys):
Daddy Saddle 1 of 8Spurs not included.Thank you, God.
Atomic Cloud Chamber with Projector Illuminator 2 of 8Oh, it'll be exciting alright.
Uranium Board Game 3 of 8Like Candy Land, only radioactive and deadly.
Atomic Energy Lab 4 of 8Performs over 150 exciting experiments! Most of them are safe! We think!
Geiger Counter 5 of 8Fun with nuclear radiation emissions!
Giddyup… and ouch! 6 of 8Prescription painkillers sold separately.
Atomic Train 7 of 8It's left the station.
Hopefully you aren't on it.
Uranium Rush 8 of 8Exciting. Electric. Deadly.
Good times for the whole family!
All photos used with permission from Retronaut.co
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