With only 17% of marriages actually being considered “happy” it’s no wonder more than half of marriages are ending in divorce. A recent Your Tango survey of counseling professionals revealed the number one indicator of divorce. So why is it that so many marriages don’t last? Continue reading for three signs, including the number one sign your marriage may not make it.
1. You’re Not Making Marriage a Priority
Not spending time with your partner is said to be a sure way to cause your marriage to end. You get your car regular oil changes to ensure it keeps running, you water the grass so it doesn’t die, and you go to the gym regularly to stay physically fit. But what do you do to keep your marriage intact? It’s no wonder a marriage where no effort is being made in order to sustain it will end.
2. You Had Cold Feet Before You Said “I Do”
Those pre-wedding jitters might be an indicator that “til death do us part” is not accurate in the case of your marriage. Experts say that having cold feet is a strong indicator that a marriage will fail. If something doesn’t appear right, before saying “I do,” it is very likely that it will worsen over time.
3. You Don’t Share the Same Values
Sure opposites tend to attract but that doesn’t mean they stay together. According to the survey, differing values about children, money or sex were found to be the number one “predictor of divorce.” When couples aren’t on the same page on issues such as when to start a family or not in agreement or on the same page when communicating with their children misunderstandings, conflict and even manipulation can occur.
With regards to money, opposing financial views and an inability to “negotiate” when it comes to such views, can result in ongoing marital discord. Dilemmas often arise in situations such as when one person is irresponsible when it comes to spending money and the other is focused on saving in an effort to prepare for the future.
Finally, differences in values related to sex, which can lead to sexual rejection, whether it is you rejecting your spouse or them rejecting you, can result in a marriage coming to an end. Experts describe “sexual conflict” as destructive. At the end of the day it seems both men and women want to be desired by their spouse on both a physical and emotional level.
The good news is that with some work it is possible to work through these issues and perhaps reach a state of marital bliss or at the very least, improve the relationship between you and your spouse.
Do you agree with the experts?
See the rest of the reasons why couples divorce over at YourTango.
Photo source: iStockPhoto
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