When You Want To Be Her...5MinutesForMom
It has been one of those days. And at midnight, it is still not over.
I am exhausted, overwhelmed and discouraged. I try to catch up with my inbox, my workload, my parenting duties, but as soon as I am finished one task, three more fill its place.
I look up from my chaos and wonder how they are doing it? Why can’t I get as much done in a day as she does? Why can’t I write as fast, stay as focused, be as successful?
What am I doing wrong?
Jealousy swirls around me, threatening to take over. I want the job she just landed, I want the traffic she gets, I want the income she makes.
Susan phones and I unload my stress on her, “I just can’t get everything done!!! I feel like such a failure — why can they get so much more done in a day then I can?!?”
After I dump out paragraphs of frustrations and fears, Sue starts to talk, to bring me back to reality.
And as she talks, I begin to write this post in my head — because I want to let you know that we all feel overwhelmed and hopeless at times.
This parenting gig is hard enough, but then we add in being entrepreneurs, bloggers, writers, business women. Some days it can be too much. Some days it feels like everyone else is handling the stress better than we are.
But the truth is it is hard for every one of us.
And considering that most of us are over-achievers and perfectionists, driven to succeed, not just for the sake of success but because it is our instinct, we are in a constant state of pushing ourselves.
Some of us have more support at home than others. Some of us have additional health challenges that complicate our lives. But none of us has it easy.
There is no easy.
So, when you look at “her” and see her success, her perfect life, her endless energy — let me tell you the truth. Let me bring you some of “her” reality.
- She has worked for months, sometimes years, without pay — promising her husband that one day it will be worth it, while she pushes down her fears that he might be right.
- She has worked all night long, while the rest of her world slept.
- She has felt overwhelmed and exhausted. She has been tempted to quit.
- She has been sure that she is the only one struggling and failing. She has looked enviously upon others’ success.
- She has felt torn and guilty as she juggles motherhood and work. She has questioned whether she is making the right choices.
- She has earned every penny and more that she will ever make — and she deserves all of her success.
Yes, she is the same as you. She has pushed through the same challenges and emotions. And she still is.
But you know the best part? When she succeeds, we ALL succeed!
Because, each time a blogger is respected, recognized, and compensated fairly, that opens opportunities for other bloggers — for you!
So, when you feel jealous or even bitter, remember that she has sacrificed more than anyone on the outside will ever know — and that her success means success for the entire community.
At times, we all feel jealous, we all feel frustrated, we all want more. It is normal.
But we don’t have to stay there.
We can celebrate her accomplishments, respect her sacrifices, and move forward with our own success.