Are Old New Dads better Dads? They take some flak for being too old for intensive
toddler-care, and the very oldest may well not be around when their kids reach
key milestones. But many Old New Dads say they feel "renewed,” and
that they are more relaxed and more interested in family life than they were
(or might have been) while scrambling early in their careers. Long work days
are less appealing now. Many also say they feel wiser and more reflective with
their kids; and that as they start to be more aware of their own mortality, they
focus more appreciatively on their children. Indeed, some of them love it to
no end. When you're an Old New Dad, the joys of family life go on well
into your sixties — and the stages of retirement and empty-nesting, which can
be a downer, are shrunk, or eliminated altogether.
Old New Dads trigger huge commercial and social implications. First, they are
likely to be richer dads. The baby industry should be aware of this new crop
of parents eager and able to spend on their kids. And for the toddlers themselves,
it means access to wealth and privilege that children born to young struggling
parents may never have.
At the same time, these children are also part of an uncharted social experiment.
For so long, we have studied the problems of teen pregnancy that we have neglected
the opposite end of the spectrum — even though in 2001, the number of children
born to fathers over 40 was practically equal to the number of children born
to mothers under 19.
And while older Moms have lots of support groups, Old New Dads are a forgotten
lot, left to fend for themselves with little guidance, books, or organizations
serving their needs. AARP, take note — Old New Dads may join you at 50,
but a growing number of them still have kids in elementary school.
In 2001, the number of children
born to fathers over 40 was practically equal to the number of children born
to mothers under 19. (Click on image to enlarge)
All of this has major implications for our society and its support systems. Old
New Dads need to work longer, and retire later, in order to pay for college tuition
and other expenses of child rearing later in life.
They need a whole new series of less physical, and more mental, activities they
can do together with their kids of all ages.
Old New Dads are likely to be bigger consumers of energy drinks, and parent support
books, since they will be doing a lot more carpooling, and less golf, than their
Empty-Nesting peers.
The children, who are more likely to be only children or caboose kids, will need
other people who can do the kinds of things younger Dads generally do, like sports
and vigorous games. On the other hand, the children will have older role models
— which may make them less interested in beer and more interested in wine, less
interested in driving fast and more interested in driving safe, and less rebellious
and more conservative in outlook.
We may also need to rethink our aging-parent support system, since many older
parents will now need help before their kids are able to provide it.
Old New Dads also become a new political force. Already in the U.K., divorced
Dads have become militant in seeking their parental rights, making worldwide
headlines by breaking into Buckingham Palace.
Finally, if it is generally thought that voters in their twenties focus on personal
opportunity, voters in their thirties and forties focus on family issues, voters
in their fifties and sixties focus on college tuition and retirement, and voters
over 65 focus
on social security and health care, then Old New Dads completely disrupt that
progression. Now they would be all about kids in their forties and fifties, college
tuition
in their sixties and seventies, and, well, beyond that, they're not focused on
much at all.
This essay was adapted by the authors from a chapter of their bestselling
book MICROTRENDS: The Small Forces Behind Tomorrow's Big Changes (Twelve, 2007).
©2008 Mark Penn, E. Kinney Zalesne and Nerve Media
