I may look dumb. But that’s just because I’m often confused. And confusion, my friends, should never be mistaken for stupidity. Unless, of course, the confusion is over something easily understandable. Like simple math. But if the confusion stems from something genuinely befuddling? Like, say, the contemplation of the obvious crush my wife’s OBGYN has on her? Now, that’s a different story.
I know what you’re thinking. I’m overreacting, right? Surely my wife’s OBGYN views her just like any other patient. Nope. I’m quite certain that he’s got a little somethin’-somethin’ for my wife. And here 5 reasons why I’m so sure.
- 1. He Never Addresses Me: Not talking holiday cards here, folks. Addressing as in speaks. He never speaks to me. Nor does he ever make eye contact. Even if I ask him a question, he answers while looking directly at my wife, as if she’s the one who asked him. Excuse, me, Doc? Could you at least pretend like you know I’m here?
- 2. He Gave Her His Contact Info: No big deal, right? Right. No big deal at all. Um, except that in all that info he doled out, he included his home number. Dude. Why don’t you just go ahead and ask her what her sign is?
- 3. All The Touching: Caroline’s last pregnancy spawned the summer months. And he often touched her legs while reminding her of the importance of sunscreen. Wait. Are we on the wrong floor? Because we need an OBGYN, not a dermatologist. At one point last pregnancy, we learned that our baby girl wasn’t gaining anywhere near as much weight as our boys were. “Why is this happening?” Caroline had asked. “Not all parts of the placenta are created equally,” he answered as he gently rubbed my wife’s calf. Wait, the placenta’s not in the leg, is it? “You see,” he continued, “your daughter is not getting the same amount of nourishment that your sons are.” Will rubbing Caroline’s shapely leg fix that?
- 4. All the Compliments: This guy is a compliment machine. He squeezes more in a 30-minute consultation than I do in a week. Many of them pertain to how lovely he finds my wife to be. I heard your wife’s hot, too, Doc. Too bad she’s too old for me.
- 5. Invasion of Personal Space: Caroline’s OBGYN is not afraid to get all up in her grill when asking her how she’s doing. Talk about a cologne check. His stare locks into hers a little longer than I might expect. Helloooo. Still right here, Doc.
Here’s the kicker though. Not only am I aware that Caroline’s OBGYN is into her, I’m absolutely 100% good with it. Here are 5 reasons why.
- 1. He’s Never Crossed the Line: There are two things of which I’m 100% certain. First, Caroline’s OBGYN does, indeed, fancy her. But second, it’s more in the way of how a teacher would fancy a favorite student. My tongue-in-cheek jokes are just that. Jokes. He’s never once crossed any type of line. At all.
- 2. He’s Doing His Job: You know what every great OBGYN does for his or her patients? Provide them with confidence. Make them feel better mentally, even if they don’t feel so great physically. So when Doc rattles off a compliment about her looks — good for him. Every pregnant woman should hear that she looks beautiful far more often. Because every pregnant woman is just that.
- 3. We’ve Been Through A Lot With This Guy: You’ve no doubt noted that this isn’t our first time with this particular doctor. As such, any affinity he feels toward Caroline is well founded. The triplet pregnancy was a very difficult one. She was on bed rest for the final 9 weeks. Five of them were in the hospital. If he treats her intimately, it’s because they are intimate. And through that intimacy, genuine affection has developed. Both have served her (and our entire family) quite well.
- 4. Favoritism Encouraged: I don’t know about you, but I’m aware that I’m getting good service from someone whenever he or she makes me feel special. Doc does just that with Caroline, and as a result, we know we’re more than just a name on the chart to him. He’s proven it time and time again. And we’re incredibly thankful for that.
- 5. He’s Part of Our Family: Do you know what the first thing Doc did when he saw us during our initial appointment a few weeks ago? He hugged Caroline. The second thing? He hugged me. Doc ushered us through one of the most complicated 36-week mazes our lives have ever known. And at the end of it came three healthy, beautiful and miraculous bundles of joy. When we found out we were expecting yet another child, Caroline was relieved to know that Doc would once again take us under his wing. I was, too. He’s like family to us. Caroline loves him. And I do, too.
What about you? Do you have a good relationship with your OBGYN? Wouldn’t you agree that a strong bond between doctor and patient during pregnancy is critical?