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7 Crazy Misconceptions I Had About Pregnancy, Birth, and Babies

I’m a huge advocate for knowing about your rights and your body. Especially after the really rough experience of losing my twins, and the way that I tried to learn all that I could during my tough pregnancy with Bella. I feel like you need to know what your body is doing in order to be the best advocate for yourself.

But.

I didn’t always know much about how things worked.

Let me clarify – I had very little knowledge on how anything to do with babies, pregnancy, and birth worked. At all.

So I thought I’d write my past “ideas” down, give everyone a little laugh over the stupidity that comes from not paying attention. (To be fair, some of these also came from a really basic sex ed class mixed with teenage assumptions.) These are all things that I really believed, and until I decided to start to learn more about my body, I wouldn’t have known any different for a long time. The doctor that saw me when I was first pregnant? Poor thing! She must have thought that I ate a lot of glue as a child.

Here they are in all their uneducated glory, my misconceptions about pregnancy, birth, and babies before I had kids:

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  • Snap Goes the Umbilical Cord! 1 of 7
    Snap Goes the Umbilical Cord!
    Yep. Honest to goodness. I thought that the umbilical cord was part of my body (STOP LAUGHING) and once the baby was born it simply snapped back inside me to get ready for another pregnancy.
  • What *is * that? 2 of 7
    What *is * that?
    Every month something happened with my body. And I wondered what it was. An infection? Was I just weird? Turns out? Ovulation. Pretty important time for making a baby.
  • Breastfeeding isn’t Real. 3 of 7
    Breastfeeding isn't Real.
    I never thought of breastfeeding. In fact, I never saw anything with a woman doing it, so I figured it wasn't something moms did. I mean some, but since my great aunt used Carnation Condensed Milk to feed her kids in the 50's (I can't grasp this concept anymore) - then it must be irrelevant. I DO wish I had known how painful it could be. Even doing it right. O_o
  • Pregnancy – the Anytime Thing 4 of 7
    Pregnancy - the Anytime Thing
    I thought you could get pregnant at anytime of the month. After all, why was I taking birth control all month long if I wasn't ready to go at any moment? So imagine my shock when I found out it was like 3 days a month (give or take).
  • What is a Placenta? 5 of 7
    What is a Placenta?
    I wasn't sure what a placenta was, what purpose it served, or (hold on now) if every woman had one during her pregnancy. I thought maybe women had it that needed a little extra something for their kid.
  • Snippity snip. 6 of 7
    Snippity snip.
    I didn't know that there were circumcised and uncircumcised boys. I just thought - everyone looked the same. Imagine my shock as a nanny when I went to change an (uncircumcised) little boy's diaper and thought perhaps he needed medical attention. Pronto.
  • What’s a Uterus like? 7 of 7
    What's a Uterus like?
    I wasn't sure what a uterus was, but I had a pretty good idea it was a round ball that waited for a baby to be planted in it. By something. Or other. Sex ed fail.

 

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Diana blogs on raising a toddler daughter and the loss of her twin boys on the aptly named Hormonal ImbalancesSmaller glimpses into her day are on TwitterFacebook, and Pinterest.

MORE FROM DIANA:

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The most age-inappropriate baby gear… EVER
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10 hilarious ways to announce your pregnancy

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